are you really comparing not wall to wall pulling to a DPS not DPSing and a healer not healing?
give me a break and buy a clue.
I am most certainly not. Just because you're the tank doesn't mean you get to dictate how the dungeon will go. The party as a whole dictates that. If you have three people, especially the healer, asking you to pull more. Not only is the whole "safe" argument moot, you're placing yourself above the majority because only you matter. I, therefore, have ever right to leave or simply kick you should I opt to do so.
No, I'm comparing being a jerk tank :
to being a jerk DPS or healer.
Dungeons are done in team, if your mentality is "my way or the highway", you're the one deserving to be kicked. Especially if you try to hide that behind doing a "favor" to your healer, that probably would appreciate bigger pulls so to not be bored.
Watch Lulcann go "you are commited for 90 minutes to a duty so I'm gonna make sure you better savor every last second of it" next.
All tanks and all healers can easily do wall to wall pulls on all dungeons at those levels. If they cant do it, they're either undergeared or theyre not playing as well as they could.
If you go in as tank, look at your healers gear and make a judgement - Maybe test the waters by going ham and see if they can keep up, and save your invlun for this pull, not using any other cooldowns, to judge if they can keep up (its also generally best to use inlvun on the 1st/2nd big pull anyway, that way its back up after the 2nd boss atleast for that trash, and you really shouldnt have to use it on bosses.)