What we actually do is be the best murderhobos eorzea has ever seen
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Ysayle is probably the best argument to Hydaelyn not being a primal, because if the Echo was sign of being tempered why would she let one of her own take advice from the Ascians? She ended up doing quite a bit of damage during her ARR appearances that go against Hydaelyn's wants after all. As well on the Warriors of Darkness, that wasn't Hydaelyn winning, that was a weakened Hydaelyn focusing mostly on the source (which matters the most) and still not being able to do nearly as much as she would want even taking into account letting her chosen do what they will via free will.
As for Shiva and Thordan, Ysayle summons Shiva with none of her followers around, only other Echo users. If all primal summonings result in non-echo summoners being tempered it wouldn't apply to that situation. If I remember correctly we never see any of her followers present for her summonings. As for Thordan its highly implied he gained the Echo via the Ascians similar to the Sahagin that did in...2.2 I think? The Heavensward do NOT have it though, and atleast one of them is/was "blessed" (tempered) by him to keep their more violent tendancies in check for his plans and I believe atleast one more was temepered because his loyalty was considered at risk.
As for peaceful/non-aggressive primals, the two we know of both realised their continued existance was bad for the planet. One elected to have us kill him. The other made a stable time loop that resulted in it being removed from time and thus could never be summoned in the future while also being unable to gather any more aether then its mere existance already had.
Well you need the Echo to turn into a Primal like Ysayle and Thordan do. So either he got it form the Ascians (as we know they are able to gift it as well), or he got it from Hydaelyn. Either way he has it.
To answer the question simply: No. She is not a Primal, she is where primals come from. To be more precise, its her aether that makes up the primals, hence the need to destroy any primals that pop out. Now, if someone were to use Ascian methods to summon the mother crystal, you would not get Hydaelyn, you would get a whole new primal, that would be your primal Hydaelyn.
You might be asking: Hydaelyn in itself is the source of aether for the whole planet, why is one small primal such a big deal? Its because most of Hydaelyns aether reserves are in use supporting the "reflections" that make up the seal for Zodiark. You could also argue that, the moment Zodiark was born and then split from Hydaelyn, it split the whole of the planets aether in half.
Well, that is my understanding of it at least. :P
I wonder... Earth could be a primal too.
lol
*does the Get Fantasy dance in a jacket made out of soda cans*
I guess the real question now is, how much free will do we have? Is our tempering somehow more advanced, because of Hydaelyns immense age and power, which gives us the illusion of choice and will?