I've fallen in love...with an NPC

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Originally Posted by Theodric

Me. I can't stand him. There's plenty of men in the game I'd happily go for if they were real - Ardbert, Regula, Varis and Hien to name but a few.

Let me put it this way:

I laughed and cheered when Emet-Selch fired his gun at the Exarch. It's just a shame it didn't take.

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On one hand I absolutely love him and want to know why you dislike him *that* much

On the other hand, that's about how I feel about Minfilia, sooo... guess I can't judge much lmao

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

I am actually incapable of telling if this thread is an sh*t post or not - it certainly reads like one. Are you actually serious, like true love serious? If so go hang out with your husband or something, that ain't healthy. Just like those relationships where people fall in love with objects - not healthy.

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What so bad about it? Because its not what is done normally? There was a time where certain sexual orientations also counted as sickness. Let people be in love with whatever they want as long as it does not hurt another human being.

Also nothing wrong imo with feeling things for NPCs. Isnt it the purpose of such stories to immerse yourself in it? Would you say its strange or unhealthy too to cry in stories, to feel something for those people?

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Originally Posted by Alleo

What so bad about it? Because its not what is done normally? There was a time where certain sexual orientations also counted as sickness. Let people be in love with whatever they want as long as it does not hurt another human being.

Also nothing wrong imo with feeling things for NPCs. Isnt it the purpose of such stories to immerse yourself in it? Would you say its strange or unhealthy too to cry in stories, to feel something for those people?

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What do you mean? If they're truly and indeed serious about being full-blown in love - which hopefully they're not seeing as they're married - it's unhealthy, as in psychologically unhealthy. Example, in the past this leads to depression and suicidal tendencies as you are not able to fully be with the person you love because they do not exist. This can also lead to common issues regarding obsession traits where the person becomes addicted to the game and must contain constant contact with the character, or some form of them. As one can imagine such behaviour results in estranged relationships. I'm hoping it's a crush or something, not a full-blown emotional love affair - I can never tell with people these days.


' Would you say its strange or unhealthy too to cry in stories, to feel something for those people?'
No, I'm not saying that. Don't put words in my mouth or assume what I mean. The only thing I touched on was 'true love'* not other emotions such as sadness, anger - etc. Most stories do not have you falling head over in love with a fictional character that a) doesn't exist b) can't be interacted with outside of a video game or the media they're portrayed in c) can't actually return the feelings with how the story is currently portrayed. Having emotional attachment is one thing, having a 'husbando' or 'wifu' in the game is the same, but there's a distinct line. Hence why I'm honestly confused if this is a 'sh*tpost' because the way OP has written it makes it sound like the emotional attachment is on par or close to their actual partner in real.

There was a time where certain sexual orientations also counted as sickness.
Also, dude - do not equate the suffering of LBGT into the same level as 'I may be in love with a fictional character' being LGBT is not equal to 'I love my body pillow' or 'I'm in true love with a figment of someone's imagination.'

Anyway; if you're just crushing OP as everyone does these days when it comes to a fictional character and not actually in the true love, in a romantic sense - which should be something you should talk to your SO about by the way - that's all good. I think Emet is lovely and has a great personality and an amazing back story. Cute as well.

*True love, meaning an attachment that goes beyond a crush and is romantic, it's what you would have with your SO or in a more platonic sense, family and very close friends. Thought I've give an explanation since the word 'Love' is often overused these days to the point it has lost its meaning and impact. To the point that it will invoke huge emotional distress if something happened to that person, mourning, depression, etc.

Love is for suckers. Feo Ul and I have an " understanding".

Besides I'm not really sure if they are my waifu or husbando.

Objectum sexual for a npc. Interesting. Though I believe objectum sexuals (people who fall in love with objects) also express sexual desires towards them.

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Originally Posted by Ayuhra

I mean who among us that have played through the MSQ are NOT in love with the Exarch?

People who say they aren't are lying.

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I don't

I don't hate him, I don't dislike him, but I don't have a feeling of love between me and him, not even the feeling of like

I like Thancred, I like Haurchefant, I like Sidurgu, I like lord Edmont, I Like Gosetsu, I like Urianger, I like Solus, I like Gaius, I like Raubahn, I like Nero, I even like Karasu and Hancock. Just don't develop a feeling for Crystal Exarch.

I have a few NPC "crushes" if you can call them that, basically my husbandos like many other people have waifus.

-Eynzarh. Who I made and right now he's at level 60.
-Gosetsu. I got his name saved on a Roe, but it's impossible to make one look like him. Might just use the hat that the NPC uses to cover his face.
-Raubahn. Can't even come close to him since he's pretty burly. So he's the husbando that I can't play around with.

They aren't really aren't any serious attachments. Sometimes I mentally pair them up with one of my characters and jot down a short story of them to flex the creative muscles or write down something fluffy when the depression/ptsd hits. Writing is a pretty good outlet!

Just like me and Daddy Zenos...But then I have underline daddy issues and should properly seek psychiatric help...

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

What do you mean? If they're truly and indeed serious about being full-blown in love - which hopefully they're not seeing as they're married - it's unhealthy, as in psychologically unhealthy. Example, in the past this leads to depression and suicidal tendencies as you are not able to fully be with the person you love because they do not exist. This can also lead to common issues regarding obsession traits where the person becomes addicted to the game and must contain constant contact with the character, or some form of them. As one can imagine such behaviour results in estranged relationships. I'm hoping it's a crush or something, not a full-blown emotional love affair - I can never tell with people these days.


' Would you say its strange or unhealthy too to cry in stories, to feel something for those people?'
No, I'm not saying that. Don't put words in my mouth or assume what I mean. The only thing I touched on was 'true love'* not other emotions such as sadness, anger - etc. Most stories do not have you falling head over in love with a fictional character that a) doesn't exist b) can't be interacted with outside of a video game or the media they're portrayed in c) can't actually return the feelings with how the story is currently portrayed. Having emotional attachment is one thing, having a 'husbando' or 'wifu' in the game is the same, but there's a distinct line. Hence why I'm honestly confused if this is a 'sh*tpost' because the way OP has written it makes it sound like the emotional attachment is on par or close to their actual partner in real.

There was a time where certain sexual orientations also counted as sickness.
Also, dude - do not equate the suffering of LBGT into the same level as 'I may be in love with a fictional character' being LGBT is not equal to 'I love my body pillow' or 'I'm in true love with a figment of someone's imagination.'

Anyway; if you're just crushing OP as everyone does these days when it comes to a fictional character and not actually in the true love, in a romantic sense - which should be something you should talk to your SO about by the way - that's all good. I think Emet is lovely and has a great personality and an amazing back story. Cute as well.

*True love, meaning an attachment that goes beyond a crush and is romantic, it's what you would have with your SO or in a more platonic sense, family and very close friends. Thought I've give an explanation since the word 'Love' is often overused these days to the point it has lost its meaning and impact. To the point that it will invoke huge emotional distress if something happened to that person, mourning, depression, etc.

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I can't believe concern trolling like this gets liked, be honest. It weirds you out. And being weirded out is the underlying sentiment behind a lot of bigotry. You don't care about this person's mental wellbeing so stop acting like you do.
I went back and re-read the OP and yeah they're a little out there. But this crap gets brought up everytime someone wants romantic sub plots and we'll never get something similar to what's in bioware games because people have these weird hang ups over fictional romance.

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Originally Posted by Kobalos

Just like me and Daddy Zenos...But then I have underline daddy issues and should properly seek psychiatric help...

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I like Zenos because on an official character development level he and WoL are pretty much the same. They're both living weapons that go where needed and he resonates with the typical player's motivations to continuously seek out stronger opponents and bigger fights. And yeah he has a great english VA, so glad i didn't get suckered into using the jp vo's haha

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

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For what it's worth, I kind of ???'d at first too because there is a level where it gets to be unhealthy. But then I kind of stepped back and thought about the context, what OP's actually doing in practice, and what language is being used.

Maybe I'm off-base, but this kind of reads to me like someone who might not be as experienced with fictional crushes getting hit with it for the first time at a later age than most folks.

I mean, when I was a teenager I got stupid dramatic about fictional crush stuff. That experience gave some context though and things kind of mellowed afterward. Some was hormones sure, but honestly it still probably would have caught me off-guard if it happened for the first time when I was older.

To some degree, part of the joke about husbandos/waifus is that they get taken way too seriously lol. It's why people act mortified if someone says "your waifu is shit". So taking it in that light plus the impression this is a normie (so to speak) who's experiencing this for the first time, it becomes not as worrying I think. A regular person who otherwise didn't know this is a thing might assume it's in line with object-marriages or whatever because the concept is novel. In practice though it's more like people swooning over Mr. Darcy or something.

It's important to compartmentalize and to remember that a fictional character, as much as you might adore them, will never have the same depth as a real human being. When you know and are confident in this, it becomes a different kind of love and pretty innocuous.

Cant wait for the parody of this thread on a certain subreddit.

My only crush is my character and... somehow Feo Ul. So weird! Yeah I know :p

Feo Ul... it all because to the warning she gives to her sisters about my inventory. Sound fun to me :D

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Originally Posted by brasteir

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I never said I found it weird, I said it was unhealthy - and it has been proven to be unhealthy with the points I've put forward. Though, now that we're here. Yes, I find it weird and illogical to love something that doesn't truly exist, that can't give you affection back outside of the original programming without intervention, and finally not be able to respond or give you what you seek that is the key to a healthy relationship. If you think I'm trolling because I find a relationship that has zero positives other than a sense of one-sided satisfaction that can't be pursued without causing mental diress then that's on you. Stay in the clouds, bud and stop projecting.

P.S I also never said anything that would imply that I actually cared. I wrote that post as I do with all my posts, scientific and lacking most emotion. Only the last part has even a hint of it and that certainly doesn't go out of the way to show my 'concern.' I'm more interested in if this is a troll or not. Unless you're referring to the LBGT stuff, then yes, I do care. Because I'm a part of it.

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Also, fictional romance. Hi, I romanced Morrigan DA:O, in DAII I romanced Merill. In Mass Effect I romanced Liara. In Fire Emblem, I'm planning to go after Claud. In Cyberpunk I'm planning to romance everyone I can. I also have a crush on Emet, and Hwoarang & Steve from Tekken. When I was a teenage girl I fangirled over Cloud Strife. So, guess that sinks your straw man argument. You can romance fictional characters in games, 'wifu' and 'husbandos' it's another thing to actually develop a relationship that's so intense that you are, as in yourself and not the character you created, in true love with them. So, again. Don't assume you know my motives.

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Originally Posted by Jaywalker

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I thought so as well, the wording was something that was rather intense and thus had me thinking that it was a troll. Everyone has these sorts of crushes, it what happens when a lot of our entertainment is from fictional characters. However, there's a line where a simple crush and the likes become unhealthy and an obsession. Again, if this isn't romantic love - then go ahead. If it is, then I'd ask why on earth this would be on par with the relationship they have with their SO.

Anyway, I'm still of a mind to think it's a joke post or something. Some good quality bait.

tldr: I don't mind people romancing chars in games with their characters or crushing. I do find it unhealthy and weird when someone gets obsessed and develops romantic and 'true love' for a fictional character.

I don't see anything wrong with this.
Even if a character is fictional they still have a personality and an appearance which can be attractive to some.

My longest crush was (and probably still is) a game character. Not FFXIV but still a fictional character nontheless.
I also had a huge crush on Papalymo when I was playing ARR and my bf was admiring Aymeric for the entire HW :'D

Unless someone is completely obsessed with a character I don't think it's strange to be attached to one.

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

pretentious snip

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"Proven" uh huh using projection on your part. Just because you'd develop depression doesn't mean the OP would. So uh yeah "Hi!" get lost.

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Originally Posted by Jaywalker

For people into ladies it's waifus.

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Excuse you. I'm gay and I have a dozen Waifus.

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Originally Posted by brasteir

"Proven" uh huh using projection on your part. Just because you'd develop depression doesn't mean the OP would. So uh yeah "Hi!" get lost.

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Lol bye~ 10/chars

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

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Lol you might be right, I've admittedly lost my touch with ID'ing troll posts over the years. Seen too many legit weird people. Figure if it is a troll post might as well laugh at that too, like getting caught in an April Fool's prank.

If it's sincere, hopefully OP manages to keep things light and fun with the fictional nature in perspective. Fantasy's fine, just need to remember it's a fantasy.

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Originally Posted by Lumivyory

I don't see anything wrong with this.
Even if a character is fictional they still have a personality and an appearance which can be attractive to some.

My longest crush was (and probably still is) a game character. Not FFXIV but still a fictional character nontheless.
I also had a huge crush on Papalymo when I was playing ARR and my bf was admiring Aymeric for the entire HW :'D

Unless someone is completely obsessed with a character I don't think it's strange to be attached to one.

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Yeah I mean I get like there are some people out there who'd go and burn down a building because their favorite character was killed off but like some people are getting way too dramatic to try and appear like an authority on "healthy behavior". It's really lame.

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Originally Posted by Jaywalker

Lol you might be right, I've admittedly lost my touch with ID'ing troll posts over the years. Seen too many legit weird people. Figure if it is a troll post might as well laugh at that too, like getting caught in an April Fool's prank.

If it's sincere, hopefully OP manages to keep things light and fun with the fictional nature in perspective. Fantasy's fine, just need to remember it's a fantasy.

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Exactly, I can't tell anymore! Times we live in, right? This forum, man - opens up the eyes xD

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Originally Posted by brasteir

Yeah I mean I get like there are some people out there who'd go and burn down a building because their favorite character was killed off but like some people are getting way too dramatic to try and appear like an authority on "healthy behavior". It's really lame.

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Hun, I studied Human Biology at Manchester University. We have a two-year course unit module in psychology. What 'authority' do you have?

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Originally Posted by Rivxkobe

Excuse you. I'm gay and I have a dozen Waifus.

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Lol no worries, got a lesbian buddy who has a solid collection of husbandos in her own right. Meant 'into' in the sense of "this is the target of your attention" more than strictly "who you wanna bang". Going nitty gritty on semantics just seemed overcomplicated haha. ;P

I mean, I had a huge crush on Ryan Gosling in The Notebook and his character never even interacted with me. You do you Boo boo.

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

Exactly, I can't tell anymore! Times we live in, right? This forum, man - opens up the eyes xD


Hun, I studied Human Biology at Manchester University. We have a two-year course unit module in psychology. What 'authority' do you have?

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Oh so then you know when you say "proven" you actually you know, provide proof, maybe from the papers you've helped publish? :)

See you when you get back from google lol

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Originally Posted by brasteir

Oh so then you know when you say "proven" you actually you know, provide proof, maybe from the papers you've helped publish? :)

See you when you get back from google lol

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Oh, I'm sorry you mean I have to write them? Pity, just have some articles that already exist. You can trounce my argument if you happen to have also written a paper however, I think that's fair.
Just for you; I'll go there. Link for source.
For further reading Here; it's a paid PDF - if you have a university you may be able to access it.
Revalent material:- Baumeister R., Wotman S., Stillwell A. Unrequited love: On heartbreak, anger, guilt, scriptlessness, and humiliation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 1993;64:377–394

As I know reading huge walls of text are a bit 'iffy' here.
7.Baumeister, Wotman, and Stillwell (1993) reported that 93% of males and females have been previously rejected by an object of passionate love and that 95% rejected someone who had such feelings for them. Romantic rejection has several negative mental health consequences: it sometimes results in homicide and suicide (e.g., Meloy and Fisher 2005; Wilson and Daly 1992) and regularly leads to clinically diagnosable depression (Mearns 1991).

Obviously, in most situations, the romance isn't real and is a scripted scenario between yourself and the NPC. Beyond that, it's fantasy. A fictional character can't return the love beyond its scripting unless you intervene and continue to take on the character yourself, at that point you're romancing your own imagination. In the end the NPC can't return the love or 'feels' the same way about you outside of the setting. You're not the WoL. Thus the love is unrequited - which is on par with 'rejection', as it means that the person rejecting you is not reacquainting that affection. Not being able to get that affection you may crave from the person you love is seen everywhere, today. All you have to do is look up, situations where there's an emotionally absent spouse or parents who do not give their children emotion. Finally, obsessions are obviously dangerous in regards to fiction; see below example. Case 1: Leonid Hmelev and the case of Taylor Gamboa Arronis. I'm not saying that OP is doing this, or will end up like this - but it has happened and is a cause of concern if a person falls truly in love with someone who doesn't exist. Like those guys who are in love with anime characters, or my little pony chars.

Have a read. I'm done here.
Obligatory mic drop.

I have no problem with fictional crushes. (Have had many myself; will have many more before I die, I'm sure.) OP seems to be taking it beyond that, though, with the phrasing being used. Though, that could just be a result of this somehow being the first time they've experienced this phenomena, so... yeah.

I mean, remember he's not real, OP. But enjoy his story. Maybe do consider reading/writing fanfiction about it or something, as an outlet. And of course, enjoy any opportunities we get to interact with him further in-game! :)

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

Just for you; I'll go there. Link for source.
For further reading Here; it's a paid PDF - if you have a university you may be able to access it.
Revalent material:- Baumeister R., Wotman S., Stillwell A. Unrequited love: On heartbreak, anger, guilt, scriptlessness, and humiliation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 1993;64:377–394

Have a read. I'm done here.
Obligatory mic drop.

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Umm these things are only tangentially related. Unrequited love is not the same as loving a fictional character, it could be an OUTCOME of loving a fictional character but that's not a given and not proven in any of your sources. Mic drop indeed.
Actually if you could find studies about men who own and live with real dolls, I think that would be way more comparable to loving a fictional character. Thanks hon!

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Originally Posted by Jaywalker

Lol no worries, got a lesbian buddy who has a solid collection of husbandos in her own right. Meant 'into' in the sense of "this is the target of your attention" more than strictly "who you wanna bang". Going nitty gritty on semantics just seemed overcomplicated haha. ;P

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I know. Just wanted to poke fun. :D

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Originally Posted by Alleluia

Are the waifus ladies? If so, Jaywalker's statement still stands.

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They are indeed ladies. I, however, am not... one. lol

And I was mostly just poking fun, I wasn't being serious at all.

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Originally Posted by Rivxkobe

I know. Just wanted to poke fun. :D

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XD All good lol, I'm sure they're top tier waifus all!

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Originally Posted by Rivxkobe

I know. Just wanted to poke fun. :D

They are indeed ladies. I, however, am not... one. lol

And I was mostly just poking fun, I wasn't being serious at all.

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I knew you were jokingly saying it. Sorry, I didn't mean to come off as overly serious either, if I did. Also, didn't see Jaywalker had responded before me, rendering my response redundant. >_>

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Originally Posted by Ayuhra

It's okay I'm in love with Emet-Selch too.

That's who we're talking about, yes?

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Only person it could be. Swoon.

But what about Hien? Don't you respect his scruff? O:

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

I never said I found it weird, I said it was unhealthy - and it has been proven to be unhealthy with the points I've put forward. Though, now that we're here. Yes, I find it weird and illogical to love something that doesn't truly exist, that can't give you affection back outside of the original programming without intervention, and finally not be able to respond or give you what you seek that is the key to a healthy relationship. If you think I'm trolling because I find a relationship that has zero positives other than a sense of one-sided satisfaction that can't be pursued without causing mental diress then that's on you. Stay in the clouds, bud and stop projecting.

P.S I also never said anything that would imply that I actually cared. I wrote that post as I do with all my posts, scientific and lacking most emotion. Only the last part has even a hint of it and that certainly doesn't go out of the way to show my 'concern.' I'm more interested in if this is a troll or not. Unless you're referring to the LBGT stuff, then yes, I do care. Because I'm a part of it.

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I just think you're taking this a bit way too seriously in all honestly, no offense.
Not sure if OP is serious but whatever happens to the love triangle is beyond
the husband, her/him and the anime cat man lol.

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Originally Posted by Mikhaill

I just think you're taking this a bit way too seriously in all honestly, no offense.

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Nah, no offence taken buddy! I more than likely was - it just happens when someone pokes at me regarding it xD. Gotta whip out the science and pretend uni was good for something.

@brasteir shoo already

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

Nah, no offence taken buddy! I more than likely was - it just happens when someone pokes at me regarding it xD. Gotta whip out the science and pretend uni was good for something.

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I don't know how useful it could be for anything if it didn't even teach you about researching material relevant to the topic or how to take important variables into account before jumping to a conclusion. You must've just scraped by.

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Originally Posted by Mikhaill

whatever happens to the love triangle is beyond
the husband, her/him and the anime cat man lol.

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Clearly the only solution here is for OP's husband to become the anime cat man like the many, remarkably patient SO's before him. :P

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Originally Posted by Jaywalker

Clearly the only solution here is for OP's husband to become the anime cat man like the many, remarkably patient SO's before him. :P

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This could actually work, OP should get their husband in on this and do a proper love triangle.

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Originally Posted by Gwenorai

Hey let's pretend getting embarrassed never happened!

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omg lol 10char

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Originally Posted by brasteir

omg lol 10char

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https://www.gifvideo.net/files/photo...tiz-ibarra.gif

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Originally Posted by brasteir

omg lol 10char

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Ok we get it. Quit harassing him.
Instead, let's just have fun with the thought of SO's husband turning into the CE lol.
It needs to be a series too. Probably get an Aymeric/Zenos/Cid/Esitenin/Hien in there so we can have some weird
harem going too LOL.

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Originally Posted by Alleluia

Ahem /clears throat in Hienese

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Oh yeah! Added lol.