I just got kicked from a dungeon because of the sounds my Lala makes when she attacks

I've had a nice sit-down and have decided the reason listed for expulsion is too asinine to be the entire reason.

Either the snippet of conversation posted is presented out of context, or there was an underlying issue. Most likely candidate would be underperformance, since the "accused" couldn't talk about it directly so they just made up nonsense on the spot.

The fact that the conversation exists as a screenshot at all likely means the op went all the way to the point of adding someone on another server to their contacts, then harassed them when they were out of dungeon, demanding an explanation for why they were kicked.

Ultimately, at least two other people (perhaps three) simply didn't want the op in there, and no amount of tos or report fudgery would make them want to keep them around.

SE is powerless when a party doesn't want a player around, so take the L and move on.

Majority vote is a proper dismissal.

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Originally Posted by HyoMinPark

If you think that’s aggressive, then I don’t know what to tell you.

Telling someone to please learn the difference between excusing/defending an action and someone offering advice that says “don’t let it get to you” is not an aggressive statement, nor is it me trying to act like the “forum police” or their “parent”. It’s me telling them to politely learn/see what the difference is.
Ironic that you want to accuse me of policing though when you ignore the rest my post just to make a comment on my word choice or the way I phrase things.

I apologize that I’m not good at sugarcoating, and that my word choice comes off as aggressive.

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Imperative sentences are by nature commands from the speaker to the subject. ("Do your homework." "Take the trash out." "Eat your vegetables.") These imply the speaker have some semblance of authority to be issuing a command to the subject. ("I, as your parent, am telling you to do your homework.") There may be no intention of authority, but it implies it all the same.

Just like when I took cpr training, when they train you on the auto defib, the instructions are not to shout out to a crowd of people for someone to call an ambulance... the directions are to very clearly point at someone and say, "Call 911." You assume and assert authority on the situation.

Even if there was no issue with what you meant, I was specifically referring to your choice of words.

Going by the spirit of what you meant - yes, people should be able to easily tell the difference between defending an action and offering advice.

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Originally Posted by HyoMinPark

I just want to ask you: do you think everyone that ever has an issue with a duty—be it with Vote Dismissal or something else—should make a thread to vent? Or should they just not post it in the thread dedicated to venting and commiserating where plenty of forum posters can and will still see their post? And sympathize/offer advice?

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I'm going to make an edit to your question: do you think everyone that ever has an issue with a duty—be it with Vote Dismissal or something else—should be able to make a thread to vent if they feel the need to.

I absolutely do think that. Would I want to read them? No, but I don't set the forum's guidelines or standards. If people DID do that, than I expect something would be done about it - like making a separate forum for it, if/when the need justifies it.

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Originally Posted by WaterShield

... and you are?

Coming across a bit aggressive yourself.

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You know - this is absolutely fair. I apologize for my aggressive choice of wording.

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Originally Posted by AxlStream

Don't take this the wrong way but I think you need to take a breather. You'll end up with a cramp with that amount of mental gymnastics.

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The only cramp I'll be ending up with is doing my part a community member, writing out Support Desk complaints for players who clearly are in the wrong. Something we should all be doing and something I can clearly tell you don't do.

13 pages for something so simple.

Did it bother you? report it. Let the GMs handle it and carry on with your day.
It didn't bother you? Carry on with your day.

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Originally Posted by Noitems

Think about yourself yes, but remember it's an online game, meaning thousands upon thousands play it together. You may not see them again, but chances are someone else could be subjected to the same behavior which they may not have the same idea as you. If you think it's wrong, and it's listed under the Prohibited Activities, you should report it. Not asking for an entire essay like this conversation we're having here, just do your part in making the community better.

Here's a line right from the same page
"Other obstruction of play
This means all other behavior that deliberately obstructs another person's game play by some means."
Your example above falls into that category and you feel that one proper action is to just ignore it? Same reasoning as above.

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I did in that case. Made the report, requeued, moved on. In other instances were I get trolled, I grumbled for a second, and then went to do what I set out to. I didnt sit on it and get angry or let it consume my thoughts. Thats all there is to it. Again, you can either sit on somethign and let it eat you up or you can just say "Screw it" and move on to doing more productive things.

This is the point youre missing. Youre expending energy on 'punishing' people and getting invested and upset over it where most of us agree its a stupid thing and its frustrating, but the key choice is to just let it go. This isnt as if they hacked your account, or were volleying slurs and harassment. This isnt them making overt and sustained efforts to prevent you from playing the game. This is a one off over a silly thing that honestly should be chalked up to "Yeah, some people are jerks. Do something better with your time than sit there and be angry."


And honestly, from my perspective and experiences, running to the GMs on minor junk like this doesnt make communities better. It makes people paranoid, shuts down friendly conversations out of fear of insult, or emboldens bad faith people because they get a rise from riling you up. There are playeres who would read this thread, and laugh at it's absurdity and then set out to do it themselves because they know that there are people who will get upset over it. Theyre jerks, but they exist, and this isnt being solved by getting angry over it. All the while everyone else just decides to keep their head down and disengage cause its easier.

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Originally Posted by SpiritMuse

I wish you could just turn off battle cries without disabling voices altogether. I want to hear the emotes, but not all the random screaming that some job/voice combos do during battle.

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I think yelpin' when getting hit is okay but the attack voices are annoying. Mainly beacuse there are only a few sounds that constantly repeat.

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Originally Posted by Noitems

The only cramp I'll be ending up with is doing my part a community member, writing out Support Desk complaints for players who clearly are in the wrong. Something we should all be doing and something I can clearly tell you don't do.

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If I reported every moron I'd encounter, I'd not be playing the game, I'd be filing reports.

I'm a White Mage, not a friggin filing clerk! That's Tataru's Job. :<

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Originally Posted by HyoMinPark

Except it's not. Telling someone "don't let it bother you" is not the same as excusing or defending the actions of someone who does something stupid or mean-spirited. If AxlStream or Melichor or myself had said "What that guy did was fine; not against the rules" - THAT'S defending him. But telling OP to not let it bother them? Not a defense. Differentiate between the two, please.

So what do you do? If you really feel like you have to "take action": report, and then move on. What else can you do? Making a thread that is now 12 pages isn't going to make people stop. Nor will it do anything to the offender.

You can report, vent to your friends, make a post in the Tales of the DF thread, and go about your day. Or you can wallow and let it get under your skin. Which are you going to choose? I'd prefer the first option. People like this guy aren't worth my time

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Except it is, and I already said why. You are still allowing the behavior to occur. Obviously making a now 13 page thread will bring attention to the issue, as it is now 13 pages long.

People like the one OP described aren't worth your time, because you haven't experienced a kick for the reason they were. If catgirls started getting kicked from parties because they were annoying, how would you react then?

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Originally Posted by JBee

Imperative sentences are by nature commands from the speaker to the subject. ("Do your homework." "Take the trash out." "Eat your vegetables.") These imply the speaker have some semblance of authority to be issuing a command to the subject. ("I, as your parent, am telling you to do your homework.") There may be no intention of authority, but it implies it all the same.

Just like when I took cpr training, when they train you on the auto defib, the instructions are not to shout out to a crowd of people for someone to call an ambulance... the directions are to very clearly point at someone and say, "Call 911." You assume and assert authority on the situation.

Even if there was no issue with what you meant, I was specifically referring to your choice of words.

Going by the spirit of what you meant - yes, people should be able to easily tell the difference between defending an action and offering advice.

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While I’m glad that you understand the message behind my message, I think you’re reading way too much into the way I talk. This is just the way I talk. I do not sugarcoat; I come across as very blunt. And that is not me intending to sound like any sort of authority figure. That is just the way I talk, and if it comes off aggressive, then all I can do is apologize.

However, when you have a back and forth with someone insisting “let it go and go about your day” is the same as “what the kicker did was fine; nothing wrong happened”, I think they should learn the difference. Telling them to learn it is not me being aggressive nor am I trying to act as the “forum police”; it’s simply me telling them to learn the difference because there is one. It’s a common trend on this forum through to accuse people of defending actions when they say things like that, though.

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Originally Posted by JBee

I'm going to make an edit to your question: do you think everyone that ever has an issue with a duty—be it with Vote Dismissal or something else—should be able to make a thread to vent if they feel the need to.

I absolutely do think that. Would I want to read them? No, but I don't set the forum's guidelines or standards. If people DID do that, than I expect something would be done about it - like making a separate forum for it, if/when the need justifies it.

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Hmm, that’s not really what I was asking, though. I asked should people make 50 threads about the same thing. And I don’t think they should—because it’s clutter (just look at the healer subforum right now). As I said, though, OP seems new to the OF. So maybe they weren’t aware of the Tales of the Duty Finder thread. I highly suggest posting in there though—and maybe even reading it. Some of the stuff in there is so unbelievable its a bit hilarious.

But again, my issue isn’t with the existence of the thread. It’s with the misconstruction of a single sentence said by someone else—the twisting it into something it never was.

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Originally Posted by JBee

You know - this is absolutely fair. I apologize for my aggressive choice of wording.

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Personally, I didn’t find it aggressive. I just found it funny because it was ironic.

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Originally Posted by TroySoFab

Except it is, and I already said why. You are still allowing the behavior to occur. Obviously making a now 13 page thread will bring attention to the issue, as it is now 13 pages long.

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Except it is not. There is a difference between someone saying “don’t let it get to you” and “what they did was okay”. “Don’t let it bother you” is advice for your peace of mind. If you can’t see the difference between the two statements, I really don’t know what to tell you.

This won’t bring attention to the issue. This thread will not be read by a GM—only a report will. No action will come out of it. It’s essentially people commiserating with a few others jumping all over people who think the OP should not let it bother them for their own sake.

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Originally Posted by TroySoFab

People like the one OP described aren't worth your time, because you haven't experienced a kick for the reason they were. If catgirls started getting kicked from parties because they were annoying, how would you react then?

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I actually already said what I would do in this situation in the same post I first responded to you in—laugh and shrug it off. Because whoever kicked me is a loser I wouldn’t want to play with anyways. I don’t think I’d bother reporting it because it’s not worth my time. I have reported behaviors in the past I thought were more demanding of a report, but someone getting triggered because he doesn’t like catgirls? Well, that sounds like a personal problem.

You’re also acting like this is a common trend. Last I heard, it’s not. People don’t get kicked every day for being a Lalafell or because their character has an annoying voice.


I have been Vote Dismissed before for the silliest of things—explaining mechanics. But the difference there is I just let it go. The dismissal was a blessing anyways. That party was a hot mess.

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Originally Posted by TroySoFab

Except it is, and I already said why. You are still allowing the behavior to occur. Obviously making a now 13 page thread will bring attention to the issue, as it is now 13 pages long.

People like the one OP described aren't worth your time, because you haven't experienced a kick for the reason they were. If catgirls started getting kicked from parties because they were annoying, how would you react then?

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I'd be more concerned about the people that needed 13 pages to know how to deal with a simple issue like this.

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Originally Posted by Alucard135

I'd be more concerned about the people that needed 13 pages to know how to deal with a simple issue like this.

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I'm more concerned with players being removed from parties because of the voice option they picked. I'm also concerned with people defending said action.

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Originally Posted by HyoMinPark

I actually already said what I would do in this situation in the same post I first responded to you in—laugh and shrug it off. Because whoever kicked me is a loser I wouldn’t want to play with anyways. I don’t think I’d bother reporting it because it’s not worth my time. I have reported behaviors in the past I thought were more demanding of a report, but someone getting triggered because he doesn’t like catgirls? Well, that sounds like a personal problem.

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If I'm understanding correctly, you have not been kicked from a party due to your selected race or voice. With that in mind, how can you accurately say how you will respond for being kicked over that. If you spent 20-30 minutes in a 24-person raid, and were kicked at the last boss because your catgirl's voice is too annoying, would you just laugh it off?

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Originally Posted by HyoMinPark

You’re also acting like this is a common trend. Last I heard, it’s not. People don’t get kicked every day for being a Lalafell or because their character has an annoying voice.

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We don't know how often people are kicked for these things, so lets not jump to any conclusions there.

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Originally Posted by HyoMinPark

I have been Vote Dismissed before for the silliest of things—explaining mechanics. But the difference there is I just let it go. The dismissal was a blessing anyways. That party was a hot mess.

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You were kicked for something actively did. I have no control over the battle noises my character makes. You do have control over what you put in chat. With the little context given I don't want to weigh in on this that much though.

Maybe its that tone? /s