It's near impossible to find a good group through the Duty Finder. Maybe then you wouldn't get so many "impatient tanks"
Guess I'm just asking too for much from randoms...

Esuna takes 1 second to cast [...]
yet, being alone makes it almost impossible to do both, dispel and heal - e.g. wall in ampakeep

I'm in Europe and haven't noticed any delays.
heard from others that they've similar probs to mine - just sucks to dodge AoEs when using a cast

I am assuming you're using the Duty Finder.
Correct

Stoneskin [...]
Ofc I use stoneskin prior to a fight and whenever there's mana and time left for it - I'm not dumb

MP usage is really not that bad. [...]
Again, I'm not stupid and know the benefits of shroud

Just make sure you utilize our tools. [...]
...

not the first time I'm playing a healer in a MMO
1000signs as a maximum is pretty annoying...