I had thought it was supposed to be that when you've failed a fight multiple times you get a powerful buff, yet the few times I've made a mistake and failed a fight once (quest instances, I havent lost in a dungeon yet so I'm unsure about that) I get a buff immediately.

This is rather disappointing, I understand that sometimes the help is wanted, but when you mess up once and know you can still win but get a buff right away, it's almost insulting.

I'm not sure if this was intended or not as when this feature was announced it was said to be after MULTIPLE failures, not one.