Server explosion destroys all computers used by SE to update frustrated customers

[Pretzelcoatl]

This just in: They have found the one working computer that everyone has been trying to log into. It was found under a pile of smoldering debris, leaking computer fluid, bloated and throbbing due to being so very full. They plan to perform a risky and invasive procedure on the device, while trying to keep the lucky few people online undisturbed, blithely playing a great video game without a care in the world. It is critical that their computer surgeons are able to retrieve the precious browser cookies, containing the usernames and passwords to twitter and the forum which all SE employees have forgotten, leaving their customers without any updates for the past 20 hours. We will return to this breaking story when something else breaks.

[SethLex]

I'm hooked, keep'em coming!

LE: Don't listen to them, they have no sense of humour at all. It's high time someone threw some irony and sarcasm at this whole thing.