Could you be suffering from Beta Fever?

[ZakarnRosewood]

Ok, I have tweaked the Ad. Hope this includes most of the extra stuff people have mentioned. Let me know if it's good to go for the next phase. The voice recording.

Do you suffer for listlessness at work? When you get home do you turn on a game only to be bored 5 minutes later? Does life seem like it should involve more chocobos? Do you find yourself waking up at night and chanting "Alpha/Beta is NOT an excuse” over and over.

If so you may be suffering from FFXIV withdrawal. Going cold-turkey with a FFXIV addiction is not advised as the FFXIV drug is quite potent and addictive, this may also have been aggravated due to the 'End of an Era' variant.

Symptoms may include, but not limited to:
Checking the Lodestone over and over.
Over-thinking the graphical intensity of grass.
Finding yourself buying clothing in colors that reflect your home in Eorzea.
Over analyzing every detail of info released from the Dev’s.
Obsession over one tiny feature that is still in development.
The assumption the game will utterly fail if you are not listened to.
Inability to focus on real life tasks.

If you believe that you experience most if not all of these symptoms, seek out your nearest white mage. Square Enix's head pharmacists are working hard on a cure, “Soon” they will perform peer reviewed tests of their new drug called 'A Realm Reborn ~ Beta Test Phases 1-4'. This will need to be taken in increasing doses every day for four-five months. This is only meant to temporarily relieve the symptoms until the official release of the ARR vaccine.

WARNING: side effects of the ARR vaccine may include, red eyes, insomnia, lack of personal hygiene, hermit-ization, pressure sores, Weight gain, muscle atrophy, time distortion, vertigo, hyperventilation, loss of consciousness, and anal leakage.

We have no desire to see your real life suffer as a consequence. Don't forget your family, your friends, your school, or your work. Please consume FFXIV:ARR in moderation to prevent complete social degradation.

This public service announcement brought to you by the Eorzean Explorers Society of Balmung.

[Dav]

lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Enkidoh]

Haha, I just noticed you've included text samples from all of us in this thread Zarkan. I love it!

[ZakarnRosewood]

Sweet! Glad you like it! I know i said I would post it Wednesday but it may be postponed, but don't fret. When I have it complete I will post it here and in the FFXIV media thread. But here first!

[Matsume]

Found a new symptome

If you believe that you experience most if not all of these symptoms, seek out your nearest white mage. Square Enix's head pharmacists are working hard on a cure, “Soon” they will perform peer reviewed tests of their new drug called 'A Realm Reborn ~ Beta Test Phases 1-4'. This will need to be taken in increasing doses every day for four-five months. This is only meant to temporarily relieve the symptoms until the official release of the ARR vaccine.

Square Enix's head pharmacists are working hard on a cure, “Soon” they will perform peer reviewed tests of their new drug called 'A Realm Reborn ~ Beta Test Phases 1-4'.

“Soon”

[valetarkus]

OMG Beta! So originally they said Beta would start Mid Feb but now they said they will finally announce Beta during the next live letter which wont be until the 22nd. So My guess is Beta will "maybe" start on the 25th. And i wouldn't be surprised if it was after that. Don't get your hopes up though... They really should have said beta starts near the beginning of March.

[Molly_Millions]

and anal leakage.

Oh Noes!

/10char

[Starlord]

OMG Beta! So originally they said Beta would start Mid Feb but now they said they will finally announce Beta during the next live letter which wont be until the 22nd. So My guess is Beta will "maybe" start on the 25th. And i wouldn't be surprised if it was after that. Don't get your hopes up though... They really should have said beta starts near the beginning of March.

Not " Live letter" it's the " Regular letter" that will be released this week.

[Picoman]

[Teloc]

Hahah....so much win in this post.