I've never really found Elitism to be an issue in FF. You can't get in the best LS on the server unless you are up to the challenge, which includes gear. Find a group that is compatible with your level and playtime. I've never seen someone who was actually trying get booted from a pickup group though.

For example in XI, if a SAM showed up to bird camp full timing a Domaru and using a Gondo, he would be laughed at and booted. Because he is literally useless. If they show up with an NQ hauby and Askar pants, no one cares that its not a hauby +1 and kitty pants.

If you joined an AV speed run or Garuda in 1.0 and are wearing full AF you would likely not be invited to go again. You aren't up to the challenge. Throw in a couple relatively cheap double melds and a bit of GC gear and you can at least be worth the party slot. Now if you joined a Moogle PUG in full AF, you'll find no one cares because you can still fill your role in the party.

Basically, don't subject others to your inability to perform if you aren't able to perform. This way you may encounter a few assholes but for the most part if you can do the job no one cares.