Chocobo Appearance Customisation

[Mijin]

I want to turn my chocobo into a unicorn that craps rainbows. I also want him to fight for me by attacking the enemy with a supersoaker filled with carnosine, and then he will use his eye laser beams to set them on fire and burn them. Then I will feed their toasted remains to my unicorn, and he will get stat bonuses depending on what I killed. He will also have super magic robot repellent armor and a red mohawk and a diamond encrusted eye patch. His name will be Mr. Sprinkles Fireblades the second, but when people ask him his name he will calmly reply "Just call me Snake, Snake Plissken..."