New Player Etiquette

[Glitchima]

I'm firmly on the side of 'just communicate' which, to me seems relatively easy, but i also understand that might be troublesome for others. I've been the insecure tank at later dungeons purely out of anxiety, I've also been the insecure and later confident healer, and a generally confident DPS, so I've tried out most roles. As a DPS, I've never had an issue with a tank playing more timid. As a healer, I've never really had a problem with a tank being a little slow, or a little bit silly, or a little bit uncaring in regards to their gear or mits or whatever. Idunno, I think if I spot a tank being unsure, I've told them when I was a healer they are free to pull more if they feel comfortable, but I've also had zero issue with them politely declining, or even not saying anything in chat.

I have anxiety, but I love MMOs very much. I know I'm not the only one who is like this, and I understand some of the critique given by other players who feel as though they don't owe anyone their time if they think the dungeons are going too slow. I think in a way, everyone has a point, to some extent? I dont' think anyone's necessarily wrong for feeling this way, I've definitely encountered some people who didn't know what job stones were in like. Stormblood content. It just happens. I'm not in a rush, but others might be, but again, I think the point is to try and meet people where they're at, if you can. I think if people leave it's their prerogative, but I also disagree with the idea that others are playing wrongly because of these things. You don't know them, you don't know why they play the way they do, you can only make an assumption, and I don't like judging people so harshly based on how many mobs they pull in a dungeon.

I believe that if you find the party members to not be working out for your playstyle and you don't want to deal with it, then by all means leave. But I think it's also okay for them to consider it an unnecessary thing to be fussed about as its casual content, I just don't think it's cool to act in any way that dismisses people and how they play and make arbitary numbers on when they think they should have been good enough to know better, ex 'If you are in Endwalker you should know by now how to play your job' etc. I feel like all of this should have a bit more merit if this person suddenly entered, idk, savage? I would find it funny still but at least in that case you could genuinely ask them to maybe figure out how to play their job properly and learn what mitigations are.

i feel like my words are mostly resorting to sounding like "we should all get along" so it kind of sounds a little naive, but I believe the best player etiquette is to always try to communicate first before having any immediate expectations because you truly never know what's going on with your party members when you're in queue with total strangers.

[Themarvin]

This isn't a "OMFG NEWBIES BEHAVE" but a: Seasoned players chill out a bit.

I'm not a newbie, but one of my partners is a long time Fiesta online vet, WOW vet etc -- He just started a couple months ago, and is now ALMOST in mid Endwalker (first half).

First of all you are a new player, being at that part of the content having played the game only make you a small fraction of the game, listen to people, pull it all if they tell you so, they know better and even if it go wrong, it would be a lesson learned that you might need to use your cool downs and more as well, embrace that.

Having played wow, has nothing to do with FFXIV, if people tell you to go for more do it, worst that can happen is a fail and unlike wow we will have a laugh of it instead and saying lets try again but try a different approach with the same amount of mobs, going wall to wall is what we do here most of all.

Seasoned players can tell you alot, it does not mean that there is not toxic people, they are everywhere, though to my experience much less in FFXIV, meaning it is rare I actually have to report someone for going totally overboard, being now, old or veteran.

EDIT:
Being new means you can actually learn quite a few things from someone else, who has played the game for years and endured all the changes and challenges, to be able to listen, should be your ultimate first goal and if you are in doubt of things, just ask.

[Nyastra]

My gripe is with story/job skippers.

I don’t mind wall-to-wall pulls—I know I can heal them just fine. But running Aurum Vale (of all places) with a tank who dies repeatedly because they don’t know how to tank, despite having that job at level 100 and others mid-level, is beyond frustrating.

I wasn’t even healing this time—we had another healer, clearly new, which is totally fine. But how are we supposed to handle situations like this? The tank kept pulling every mob in sight, refused to use cooldowns, and the healer simply couldn’t keep up. This, of course, frustrates the healer: they’re new, everyone keeps dying, and as the healer, it’s their job to keep the party alive. Meanwhile, the tank is just… facerolling the keyboard, running headfirst into the same problem again and again.

A dungeon that should take, at most, 10 minutes ends up taking 30 because, apparently, nobody can be bothered to use… I don’t know, braincells or something. I can draw no other conclusion than that they’ve job-skipped or MSQ-skipped—because if you actually played the story, you’d know where to go in Aurum Vale and how to tank properly.

I’ve been playing for years, and I still don’t understand why Aurum Vale in particular always seems to bring out this exact scenario—people throwing themselves headfirst into a wall over and over, hoping somehow the outcome will change.

[Shistar]

I don’t mind wall-to-wall pulls—I know I can heal them just fine. But running Aurum Vale (of all places) with a tank who dies repeatedly because they don’t know how to tank, despite having that job at level 100 and others mid-level, is beyond frustrating.

I wasn’t even healing this time—we had another healer, clearly new, which is totally fine. But how are we supposed to handle situations like this? The tank kept pulling every mob in sight, refused to use cooldowns, and the healer simply couldn’t keep up. This, of course, frustrates the healer: they’re new, everyone keeps dying, and as the healer, it’s their job to keep the party alive. Meanwhile, the tank is just… facerolling the keyboard, running headfirst into the same problem again and again.

I'm usually the first one to tell the tank to quit being dumb and use his mits, especially if the same thing happens twice in a row. Sometimes the tank will listen and actually pull smaller or use mits, other times I get ignored / I find out the tank doesn't understand English (or whatever the translator spits out when I try to match their launcher's language) / seems they're not reading the chat and just give the sprout healer my condolences :') you poor things.

I’ve been playing for years, and I still don’t understand why Aurum Vale in particular always seems to bring out this exact scenario—people throwing themselves headfirst into a wall over and over, hoping somehow the outcome will change.

There's something in the air in that place besides the toxic gas, I swear.

[Elephantality]

I’ve been playing for years, and I still don’t understand why Aurum Vale in particular always seems to bring out this exact scenario—people throwing themselves headfirst into a wall over and over, hoping somehow the outcome will change.

Probably one of them is similar to mine once. I mostly tank with Warrior, and I got that to level 80. Yet I realize, I should not level that any further. I should level one of the other tanks. So I think, sure I'll take my Paladin, level 50. I get into a leveling dungeon, and it's Aurum Vale! I realize my gear for Paladin was crap. I realized this as mobs were hitting me hard, and eventually the boss. The party is very patient with me, and we finally get past the first boss, but I die at it. At that point, I tell them thank you for trying, but I have to bow out so they can get a tank that is better geared and won't annoy them further. That was embarrassing. So it's possible some hard focused another tank or another class and didn't realize they should probably have watched a video guide on how to tank before trying.

[Nyastra]

Probably one of them is similar to mine once. I mostly tank with Warrior, and I got that to level 80. Yet I realize, I should not level that any further. I should level one of the other tanks. So I think, sure I'll take my Paladin, level 50. I get into a leveling dungeon, and it's Aurum Vale! I realize my gear for Paladin was crap. I realized this as mobs were hitting me hard, and eventually the boss. The party is very patient with me, and we finally get past the first boss, but I die at it. At that point, I tell them thank you for trying, but I have to bow out so they can get a tank that is better geared and won't annoy them further. That was embarrassing. So it's possible some hard focused another tank or another class and didn't realize they should probably have watched a video guide on how to tank before trying.

Fair, but that's self awareness vs just not giving a damn. Whenever I notice something go awry in dungeons, gear is the first thing I check, whether it be the tank or the healer. That determines what can and cannot be done. So for a tank, geared nonetheless, to run himself stupid into the same walls, that's rather aggravating. I was fortunate enough to not deal with this much when I started healing as I always had people to play with who tanked for me and properly taught me how to heal. Our newbie however, doesn't have that luxury. Unless I commit to constantly tanking my way through ARR - DT.

[VeyaAkemi]

I’ve been playing for years, and I still don’t understand why Aurum Vale in particular always seems to bring out this exact scenario—people throwing themselves headfirst into a wall over and over, hoping somehow the outcome will change.

I feel they do it because they have the experience that it does change, not because they magically improved over the last pull, but because each pull will trim down one or two enemies, until it becomes manageable, and they don't seem to understand that's what happening and not that they performed better all of sudden, of course, that can't happen if you are wiping before any enemies die at all.

[Nyastra]

I feel they do it because they have the experience that it does change, not because they magically improved over the last pull, but because each pull will trim down one or two enemies, until it becomes manageable, and they don't seem to understand that's what happening and not that they performed better all of sudden, of course, that can't happen if you are wiping before any enemies die at all.

You are probably right. I usually play ranged dps, so in this case I know I can kite a few mobs down until I absolutely eat the floor. But lord. I'm tired lmao

[SkoNay]

Had this situation yesterday, tank was 50+ and single pack pulling (I forgot which duty). I’m guessing they were newer to tanking? They were not using mits very well and got caught by mechanics. Was it annoying? Yeah. But I qued into leveling so I just sucked it up and did as much dmg as I could. Tank did start to pull more at the end, so yay for them.

What would prolly help the group, is if the tank gave a quick heads up at the start. Something like ‘hey first run of the day, need to warm up’ or ‘haven’t tanked in a while, need to remember the flow’. Just something to set the expectation. Could be difficult if they play with a controller to type all that, but slow tanks shouldn’t see others leaving as their fault, there are plenty of DPS willing to go slower for a clear.

New/learning tanks can always try and make friends with a healer to run too. Let them have the confidence to try bigger pulls and the room to mess up, knowing their healer pal has their back.