Ridiculous 2.0 expections

[AngelicBeing]

I dunno about you guys, but this is getting kinda crazy.

• 2.0's graphics will be so incredible, you can see them with your mind. As a result, even blind people will be able to play 2.0.
• 2.0 will have unprecedented levels of fun. Fun produces laughter, and laughter is the best medicine. Therefore, by the transitive property, 2.0 will cure cancer.
• 2.0 will be hailed worldwide as the greatest game of all time. The massive amount of profit it generates for Square Enix, and the tax revenue generated for the nation of Japan, will lead to the launch date becoming a Japanese national holiday. By popular demand, Yoshi-P will run for prime minister of Japan and win, virtually unopposed.
• Achievements in 2.0 will grant pleasure far beyond a usual sense of accomplishment. With enough achievements, players will be able to transcend to a state of Nirvana.
• The gameplay in 2.0 will feature intense immersion, so by leveling a class or job in 2.0, you will be able to perform all of its abilities in real life. Yes, even magic. 2.0 will teach players to use actual magic in real life. No smoke and mirrors. A disclaimer will run before the game warning players not to destroy their computers or homes by using Thunder inappropriately.
• The UI in 2.0 will be so amazingly intuitive, it will even offer a feature that allows players to control the game by uploading the contents of their brain onto the servers. As a result, you will be able to leave your body and live in Eorzea for eternity.

So what've you guys heard lately?