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  1. #1
    Player
    StormChase's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2024
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    69
    Character
    Baidur Haragin
    World
    Jenova
    Main Class
    Dragoon Lv 100

    DT's Writing: What Could've Been Better

    Some of these points may seem like nitpicks, but I'm not trying to be too negative. I'm saying this because I want to point out ways the writing can improve, and because I think a lot of the genuine issues are misattributed. The vast majority of problems with the writing don't stem from any one character, but from time. There's not enough time to fully flesh out the characters and concepts.

    At its core, Dawntrail's trying to pull off several things at once:
    • Wuk Lamat's character arc
    • Comparing/contrasting both the other claimants and Sphene with Wuk Lamat
    • Krile's character arc
    • Erenville's character arc
    • The Warrior of Light's transition to mentoring
    • Teaching the player about the different cultures in Tural
    • Teaching the player about Alexandria

    These points are really hard to accomplish in just 100 quests without either some or all of them feeling half-assed. It ends up making Dawntrail function like a speedrun from Point A to Point B. The sidequests help somewhat, but there's only so much they can do to supplement the MSQ. And the pacing leads to problems like these:
    • The main party doesn't interact enough with each other outside of what's necessary for the feats and saving Tuliyollal, especially between Wuk Lamat and Erenville. Aren't they supposed to be childhood friends?
    • Every major character's arc is either rushed or barely touched upon.
    • The Warrior of Light's expected to be a mentor but doesn't get many opportunities to give advice beyond a few lines.
    • There's a lot of tell over show in some places and not enough tell or show in other places.
    • Wuk Lamat's outburst happens too early.
    • Missed opportunity for more friction between Wuk Lamat and her family.
    • Missed opportunity for Wuk Lamat to try and fail emulating her brothers' methods.
    • Bakool Ja Ja faces zero consequences for releasing Valigarmanda.
    • Zereel Ja faces zero consequences for abusing his sons.
    • Some of the cultures we see are brushed over (Xak Tural...).
    • The second half may be even more rushed.
    • Alexandria is introduced too late.
    • There's barely any time to get to know Sphene before the heel turn.
    • It feels like Zoraal Ja and Sphene are competing for space as the main villain.

    In addition to this, there's a second problem that exacerbates the first one. The writers feel the need to insert the main Scions into everything, even when there isn't much to gain from their presence. Alisaie and Alphinaud are by far the biggest offenders. They don't need to be in the main party. Everything they learn that could help them with Garlemald, they already knew. Y'shtola and G'raha have some justification for coming back, but the only two Scions (excluding Krile) who feel like they have to be there are Thancred and Urianger, and that's so they can help Koana.
    (24)

  2. #2
    Player
    Zakuyia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2022
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    597
    Character
    Zakuyia Shizyuie
    World
    Zalera
    Main Class
    Dancer Lv 100
    How the hell are we mentoring....when did we mentor we did a bunch of head nodding.... yeah DT story is a mess arcadia is still awesome tho
    (20)

  3. #3
    Player
    Hallarem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2023
    Posts
    958
    Character
    Hallarem Aurealis
    World
    Omega
    Main Class
    Dragoon Lv 100
    Not really a mentor, more like a barely willing mercenary hire, that got tempered by the plot like all the scions.

    A lot of those things couldve been accomplished, but the plot was both rushed and slowed down at the same time. A lot of padding that had no place to be MSQ quests. Just horrid pacing in general
    (17)

  4. #4
    Player
    sindriiisgaming's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2023
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    1,430
    Character
    Sugar And'spice
    World
    Twintania
    Main Class
    Reaper Lv 100
    Wuk lamat never happening would have instantly took the story higher. We needed less about tural and more about the 9th shard
    (8)
    Quote Originally Posted by sindriiisgaming View Post
    your titanmen, hes titanmen IM TITANMEN are there anymore titanmens i should know about?

  5. #5
    Player
    Midare's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2021
    Posts
    336
    Character
    Midare Dare
    World
    Famfrit
    Main Class
    Thaumaturge Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by StormChase View Post
    These points are really hard to accomplish in just 100 quests without either some or all of them feeling half-assed.
    It took 32 quests in the post Shadowbringer quests for me to go from "Oh, who was this guy?... ah right, Elidibus." to "Oh god the poor thing! Let me hug him!!" while bawling my eyes off.

    In 100 quests they couldn't make me like Poochie.

    When you have such a black hole like her, everything else suffers, everything else gets pushed to the bare minimum in favor of that black hole.

    There's your main issue.
    (22)

  6. #6
    Player
    Daralii's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Posts
    2,960
    Character
    Endris Caemwynn
    World
    Coeurl
    Main Class
    Gunbreaker Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by Zakuyia View Post
    How the hell are we mentoring....when did we mentor we did a bunch of head nodding.... yeah DT story is a mess arcadia is still awesome tho
    Characters occasionally said we were mentoring her, though we never actually did anything and she overcame everything completely on her own without actually working to do so.
    (13)

  7. #7
    Player
    Carin-Eri's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2022
    Location
    Old Sharlayan
    Posts
    1,866
    Character
    Carin Eri
    World
    Phoenix
    Main Class
    Sage Lv 100
    Wuk Lamat aside for a moment, I have to say that my biggest issue with the writing was how they handled Solution 9.

    I honestly feel that it should've been kept out of the trailers/cinematics. I spent a good portion of the MSQ wondering when it would bring us to it. And I'll admit, when we did finally get there I was a little disappointed. I mean, the pre-release material 'hyped' it up (and I don't think that's an exaggeration considering the amount of speculation that was generated around it) but when we did reach that part of the MSQ we just kinda.... arrived there. I'm not sure what I was expecting really, but I don't think it was "okay, you can go to Solution 9 now" out of the blue.

    And from what the in-game dialogue suggests, the reason it's called Solution 9 is a complete letdown too! All that speculation regarding the name and it's possible significance. And then we meet an NPC who says "Either way, for we citizens, there's nary a problem that lacks a solution - hence the name.". What a catastrophically boring 'reveal'!

    The map is gorgeous - but, for me, it stands as a testament to unrealised storyline potential.
    (13)
    Last edited by Carin-Eri; 09-09-2024 at 07:42 PM.

  8. #8
    Player
    CaptainLagbeard's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    2,255
    Character
    Rhaya Jakkya
    World
    Odin
    Main Class
    White Mage Lv 100
    wuk having a character arc to begin with might have made the character better.

    Letting other characters actually participate in the story would also help. The WoL is just there to carry the group through dungeons, we have no other role in the DT's MSQ.
    (9)

  9. #9
    Player
    Daralii's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Posts
    2,960
    Character
    Endris Caemwynn
    World
    Coeurl
    Main Class
    Gunbreaker Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by Carin-Eri View Post
    Wuk Lamat aside for a moment, I have to say that my biggest issue with the writing was how they handled Solution 9.

    I honestly feel that it should've been kept out of the trailers/cinematics. I spent a good portion of the MSQ wondering when it would bring us to it. And I'll admit, when we did finally get there I was a little disappointed. I mean, the pre-release material 'hyped' it up (and I don't think that's an exaggeration considering the amount of speculation that was generated around it) but when we did reach that part of the MSQ we just kinda.... arrived there. I'm not sure what I was expecting really, but I don't think it was "okay, you can go to Solution 9 now" out of the blue.

    And from what the in-game dialogue suggests, the reason it's called Solution 9 is a complete letdown too! All that speculation regarding the name and it's possible significance. And then we meet an NPC who says "Either way, for we citizens, there's nary a problem that lacks a solution - hence the name.". What a catastrophically boring 'reveal'!

    The map is gorgeous - but, for me, it stands as a testament to unrealised storyline potential.
    It also quickly became a vassal state of Tuliyollal because Gulool Ja has exclusive control of the murder robots. The fact that NPCs voice their displeasure with this is welcome, though I expect it to be resolved or forgotten very soon.
    (1)

  10. #10
    Player
    Vhana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2024
    Posts
    25
    Character
    Asrais Felstar
    World
    Lamia
    Main Class
    Black Mage Lv 52
    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainLagbeard View Post
    wuk having a character arc to begin with might have made the character better.
    It doesn’t fix anything else, but I don’t understand why they didn’t just use the arc that the story offered her.

    The Rite of Succession, which could be shorter, established Wuk Lamat as a well intentioned but naive optimist. She grows a bit but remains steadfast in that happiness and peace can be achieved with talk and tacos. She gets everything she has ever wanted when she becomes Dawnservant with her brother. Act I ends. Joy and smiles all around.

    We spend unknown time in Shaaloani and the Dome appears. In a matter of *days*, Wuk Lamat goes from living her dream life to being on a quest to kill a sibling and having lost both parental figures. She is not established as a stoic, cool under pressure character who is steeped in years of loss and wisdom. She is a naive optimist - that has just lost everything to betrayal. Her world view should be shattered at this point in the story.

    Wuk Lamat learning to choose love and peace and optimism and tacos not out of naivety but in the face of deep loss is a great potential character arc. It’s a shame she didn’t get it, but there was apparently already too much happening to take the time to treat the expansion’s ‘main character’ as an actual person experiencing and responding to the events happening to them.
    (5)

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