Quote Originally Posted by ShivahnuAhnJura View Post
it's gotten to the point in which we are self-sabotaging decent parties with our own toxicity. Innocent questions get twisted into insults
No, I have not experienced this much. If this is what you are experiencing, then I mean no offense, but it sounds like you are doing something that frequently triggers people and it may be worth trying to do it differently.

People spy on others' damage/gear/food/pot usage.
No, I have never experienced this in PF at all. People spy food usage and that's really it. I never see people notice others' gear usually (unless their HP is noticeably low like a Hades Ex party I was in where they didn't even have free artifact gear from The Tempest) and I never see anyone discuss pot usage. In fact, most people in PF don't seem to know what pots are lol! Somehow, many of them get clears despite that.

They know that they can't discuss their damage without getting into trouble, but they do make vague references to it sometimes or just silently abandon the party.
I've had people get so angry after one pull and they bring up their life story about how nobody in party finder can clear and we all suck, bringing a negative attitude to a party that was perfectly alright. (This is mostly M2 Savage from my experience)
I'm trying to think why this would happen in PF so I checked your server. You're playing in the EU. I think that's why. EU is like this, NA is not.

EU players are on average more passionate, more savvy, more sweaty, more blunt and if they have a rude comment to make, they won't hold back despite the rules.

NA players tend to be extremely casual in my experience so they don't notice a lot of this stuff and if they have something rude to say, they often avoid it due to the rules and silently leave the party.

As the other reply said, you can report rude behaviour. EU players often break the rudeness rule because they can't hold back. I hardly play there, but just doing a rare expert roulette, normal raids roulette, trial roulette, leveling roulette, I run into some extremely toxic and awful behaviour in EU that I guarantee I never see in NA ever.