<sarcasm>
Hey guys, we just founded the Church of Blahawabbel. We have this great monopoly on understanding what life is, and it is that anything that has not been blessed by Blahawabbel is not truly alive. This is confirmed by all our narratives written by us for our own consumption, and accepted by us and everyone who agrees with us and thinks just like us. So logically, all other people-shaped entities trying to convince you that they too are living beings, are really not. Everyone that doesn't agree with our definition must just accept that their place as the mere mockeries of live that they are even if they act in all ways like us living things, and nothing they do or say can detract from our conclusion that they are not alive, because only we write that narrative.
</sarcasm>