My friend who plays a male Midlander was literally able to walk up to Zero and see that her proportions and running animations were the exact same as their character's. Her armor is specifically designed around a male Midlander body regardless of what the wiki says.

Anyway to respond to OP; I really sympathize and in general would love for these type of options to eventually open up too. I've been wanting to play a female character as androgynous as Zero for like, a decade now, and am pretty excited for female Hrothgar since their proportions in armor appear to be the closest I'll ever get.

Unfortunately, I would also temper expectations since it seems like they often do multiple takes with the voice actors for references to your character's gender using he/she pronouns (and this has been the standard since ARR, which means these takes include voice actors that they no longer work with). I feel like the only possibility of a "they" pronoun option ever happening would require people to be awkwardly okay with some voiced cutscenes in previous expansions only using "he" or "she"...