It's a habit that players have picked up, especially in the dungeons of the current expansions, which are almost designed to pull as much as possible. There are arguments that make these pulls objectively better: greater efficiency in terms of AOE for dps; more interesting gameplay for the heal (a question of seniority; but I swear that after a certain time, you'll have tools that will make restricted pulls annoying); and the fact that, for many, these are dungeons that we've done hundreds of times, so we want to do them quickly.
The downside is that this pace makes some tanks forget that the original aim is not to w2w, but to pull as much as they can handle. I'm looking specifically here at those who attack the big packs of Mont Gulg and Ziot with all their defensive cd's on cooldown; or those who run around in level 40-50 dungeons forgetting that these are instances where there are frequently problems because neither healers nor tanks have many tools; or those who forget to look at whether they're with level 90 players, or with sprouts who aren't so geared.
Some recommandation :
- They sprint ? You sprint with them. No question asked, just follow them as closely as a paparazzi following the star whose photos he wants to obtain.
- You will gradually gain instant healing abilities that you can use during pulls. At low level, you can place your regen on the tank, and if necessary stop to cast a short heal (< briefly, remember 1st point).
- Specify at the start of the dungeon that you are new. Too few people have this reflex (out of fear?) even though it should be systematic.
- Learn to prioritize. A dps has just eaten an aoe, but you're already struggling with the tank? So much for the dps. The healer's job is to provide healing, but also to distribute it correctly depending on the teammates present.
-You will notice that you gain a lot of healing tools; don't keep them in case of a hard blow, but use them frequently. FFXIV is a pro-active game, meaning it is designed so that your abilities are used in rotation.
And finally, don't beat yourself up too much. People who chant "get good" tend to forget that in the beginning... Well, it's easy to be lost. A good tank is one that will certainly be able to take as many packs as possible; but it is also the one who will notice that you are new; that you have X job, so X healing habilities at this specific level; and will be able to adapt accordingly and take two packs instead of a full w2w in Stone Vigil.