"Enhanced Blacklist Functionality" Safety Concerns

[Rueby]

Out of curiosity, is in-game stalking common? How does it start---with (now-former) friends, or strangers? I'm guessing that this is happening more often to women?

I feel fortunate because I've been gaming online since I was a child (so, for about two decades), and although I've encountered all kinds of "interesting" people, I have never been stalked/harassed to this sort of magnitude. Not to make too much light of things, but I feel left out here. Tell them they can stalk and harass me so I can sell them books and workout advice, or at least consider them a legion of adoring albeit confused fans.

I honestly don't wish it upon anyone because the whole 'I don't feel safe anymore' isn't a great feeling to feel and irl stalking usually ends up in the death of the victim because it's not really taken seriously until something 'happens', so in a sense it's a pretty scary thing.

Not on this game but another and it persisted for 4 years on social media. Someone who apparently got attached to me despite only knowing me for maybe a month, decided I was the only love of his life, he followed me around, he'd spam my inbox, he'd create new accounts to try and pretend he's someone else and 'trick' me into talking to him without me knowing. Prolonged messages about if I didn't talk to him he'll game end himself, he infilterated my friend circles and I essentially had to leave it all.

Another in GW2 when I was younger and new, someone took fancy to 'helping' me, I thought he was being really nice then he started to get abusive and obssessive and when I tried to put some boundaries and that didn't work (I blocked him) he started stalking me ingame until I quit for months (luckily he didn't have any social media because I stopped using it).

I really miss the time when I was really social but it's good to remind myself that danger isn't always around the corner. It's really hard for someone who has recently dealt with such things or is currently dealing with it imo...It's nice that SE is trying to give us agency over how our information is displayed; I think it's a step in the right direction.

[Jojoya]

It's nice that SE is trying to give us agency over how our information is displayed; I think it's a step in the right direction.

Which I think is the most important message here.

SE has started the process that many players have been requesting for a few years now. More tools may be added later as they get them developed and debugged but for now, let's make use of the new tools and see how many of our problems they fix and what remains a problem. Then we can make additional suggestions.

For those who are debating if someone can be harassed or stalked if they can't see/hear the other player, the answer is yes. As an example, fueling the rumor mill has been one method used for harassment for a very long time. Too many people can't resist gossip and they aren't always going to stop and think about how damaging it can be. Stalking generally involves the target not even knowing that their activities are being monitored in some fashion.

The problem is that making your character invisible to them will not prevent harassment or stalking from happening. The easiest workaround is to have other service accounts or make friends with those who are also your friends (or at least know you).

Your best defense is to roll your eyes and not let them bother you. 99% of stalkers and harassers are just trying to provoke reactions out of others, and for some reason they've picked you as their target. If you don't react, eventually they'll get bored and move on.

It's the remaining 1% that is the problem, and that 1% is not going to be easily deterred. The harder you try to make it for them to get to you, the more determined they are to continue their "attentions", many times in a stealthier fashion so you can't catch them at it.

But remember this is an online game. As long as their only way to contact you is in game and all they know about you is your character name, you're in no danger as long as you stay smart.

Do not share your character name(s) any place where it might be connected to other online accounts that link to your real life information in some way.
Don't share your personal information with people you only know from online, no matter how well you think know them. A friend today could turn into an enemy tomorrow. Save your personal information for family and friends that you know from real life, that you can go beat up if they give your information to someone else (okay, little bit of a joke but you should get the idea).

The reverse is just as true - no need to share your online character information with people in real life unless they are also playing the game with you. The last thing you need is to have a relative post in social media "oh my cousin RealName also plays that game, their character name is StalkerTarget, maybe you've met them". Suddenly there's a potential way for a stalker to search and find you without your knowledge.

The internet has a scary amount of information that will come up about people these days if you do a simple search. A lot of it is wrong but some of it is accurate. Better safe than sorry - limit that crossover between real life and online life to what's strictly necessary and as secure as possible.

Is this something that's going to happen to everyone? Of course not. Most will never have problems of this nature whether online or in real life. But do you really want to be that one in a million person that it does happen to?

Use common sense. Don't overshare information when it really is not necessary.