Friends list and Blacklist help

[ThatQEDguy]

I believe the blacklist and friends list needs to be looked at asap. As they stand, they open up people to being stalked and put more power into those would-be abusers.

If you are mutual friends with someone and you suffered abuse from them, as soon as you unfriend and blacklist them, you haven given them a ton of power over you. Whenever you unfriendly someone, it only does it for your side. You will still be on their friends list until they remove you. The only thing the blacklist does is the following:
Sending tells
Teleporting to your house/apartment/FC(From your menu)
Joining your PF
Trading
Inspecting your adventure plate

Things unconfirmed, but possible:
Porting to your house/fc if you use someone else's port list


Here is what they can do(if prior friends):
See your online status(includes duties you're in or other worlds)
See your search info
Request melds/repairs
(If following) lodestone info
Join parties if someone else is leader

Additional info:
If you were Eternal bonded with someone and you rescind the bond, It only does it for your end. Their ring will still work to teleport to you. This is unacceptable regardless of what mindset Yoshi P has.

I know some suggested ways to combat this is to report them. But it's very hard to prove that someone is stalking you if you port to the same area. They could easily say they just happened to go there for a unrelated reason. It's also hard to know if any action was taken since generally, you don't get any notification if anything was done.

The only way to be rid of someone attempting to stalk you is to completely move Data Regions since DC travel is a thing now. This should not be a thing still yet it still is. I understand that Yoshi P doesn't want to do it because of a JP mindset, but he needs to come to terms that bad people play this game and he needs to protect players.

I really hope I'm not the only one that sees this as an issue.

Q: When I delete a person from my friends list, I want my character to disappear from theirs, as well!

Yoshida: That would lead to the problem of “Why did he delete me?” and might cause trouble, so we didn’t do that on purpose.

Full interview:https://gamerescape.com/2019/01/04/y...-yoshi-p-walk/

[Ayan_Calvesse]

Footnote; if you unfriend someone they cannot teleport to your home.

I think the problem is that people need to stop paying so much attention to what others are doing by "existing" I seen this prior where folks complain about being stalked because the person whom they met at the Limsa aetheryte; still day after day appears at said Limsa aetheryte after their interactions have soured. Reality is the game by large and away has a handful of places where folks meet up; so if you meet someone there - then its likely they will continue to exist there regardless how you feel; which can appear as stalking. People tend to run in notoriously small circles.

That said ABUSIVE behavior should be reported such as if they keep spamming you with trades; all the Blacklist does is stop them from interacting with you. The only thing they can do that is really potentially abusive is request melds and repairs; but again thats documentable and reportable. As for "Join parties if someone else is leader" if that was not the case I could see how that could easily be abused; you not liking someone should not exclude them from PF simply because you both have the same goal - especially when some DC's have very small PF's during certain hours.

I disagree that punishing players based on the feelings of another is in anyway fair; that said I do agree that Blacklisting should immediately remove you from someones friends-list. As should it not permit any sort of Teleport to function such as EB.

[Rueby]

I've been stalked in real life and online for years before, luckily the in real stalker went to jail for a time but the experience left me really shaken. I think once a friend of mine told me how the friendlist system works I lost all motivation to add people and socialize out of fear that I might get stalked again. I understand that not everyone will turn into a stalker but the fear remains. I'd like some control over who sees my location in game, I don't wish for that information to be so readily accessible. The concept of removing someone and them being able to monitor where I am is horrifying.

I'd love to get the rewards from marriage cermony but I'll never be able to handle the teleport ring (dubbed stalker ring) ever.

The blacklist system doesn't even work as it should, I remember I had a huge fall out with someone and it happened on discord, when I went to blacklist them ingame after removing them I couldn't. The blacklist system that somehow encourages you to physically seek (pseudo-stalking?) a player to blacklist them or if the player is offline- tough luck.

I honestly sometimes wish for an appear offline feature that functions just like being online but shows you offline on people's friendlist.

I've honestly read about a stalking situation that went unresolved for a long time in this game (I think it was posted in these forums too)...It won't really deter someone who wishes to go out of their way to stalk you but it'll offer huge peace of mind for some people to not have their location so readily accessible in case things go south. It'd also be nice if you can opt out of being visible in the Player Search function....but one can dream.

I'd love for the friendlist and blacklist system to be more robust and give players agency over their information. Once someone has your lodestone URL, you're also done. It doesn't matter if you name change, your URL is fixed (as far as I know).

[Broxit]

I completely agree with you. My friends and I are going through something very similar. There was a person removed from my friend's FC becuase of the level of drama they caused, and have been sending harassing and even some threatening messages to my friends and FC leader. This person goes to lengths to continue this behaviour such as making new characters just to spam these messages and immediately logs off and deletes the messages. Reports to square enix have been sent consistently since November of last year and it clearly has not rectified the issue.

SE keeps suggesting to blacklist and report. What good is the blacklist if they immediately delete a level 1 character? I am sure they have some of us on thier friends list although we removed them from ours. We asked SE to remove our names from thier list and they said no as it would go against their privacy policy to "tamper" with someones friends list. I guess the safety of the community is not covered anywhere in thier policy although they say they take harassment "very seriously". They have seen plenty of screenshots of what is being said and still doesn't seem to make a difference.

The door remains open to harassment and threats due to a flawed policy and system. What about OUR privacy of not wanting OUR names on someone elses friend list any longer? Why doesn't blacklisting someone do that automatically? Name change? Well, they can still figure it out.... This really needs to be fixed.