Quote Originally Posted by Renalt View Post
Sorry I'm having a heard time putting the thoughts and feelings into words so I may get off track.

Anyway people feel SO strongly about things and passion is good but you gotta leave out the hate. None of us are special. What one likes someone else is gonna hate and that's just the way things are going to be. If there is a middle ground I'm sure they are trying to get that up and running. You guys just somehow react as if you have been personally WRONGED and you just hold grudges. I UNDERSTAND that feeling. It feels good to be angry and feel validated in your rage. I've been there. However let me tell you from experience...Rage has a cost and I'm going to tell you what I paid.

Decades ago when I was 18 I had a big fight with my family. My other specifically and I heard what most have probably heard before..."You live under our house, so you live under our rules". Well I said "Understandable. Goodbye" and I left. I was so angry at them ( sorry not going into the why ) and I moved out of state and as far away as possible. I didn't say a WORD to them for years. People in my hometown actually thought I was dead because I popped smoke and vanished with no word and that's the way I wanted it. I wanted to punish them for what they did and I felt JUSTIFIED in my anger. However years go by and my aunt tracked me down while I was at work...

"Renalt. Your mother is dead. Please come home."

I was still angry. I told them I was busy at work and couldn't be bothered with things. So they left. It wasn't until like another 2 years when I reconciled with my family and paid them a visit. I just got home and I was on the couch and for the most part it was exactly the same house. "Oh hey that's a nice vase. When did you get that?" "I got it when your mother died".
Your situation is the reason why I do not cut off my mother; my parents and I (more my mother and I) do not really see eye to eye. My mother is disdainful of my choices in life; my choice to be a traditional wife and mother instead of going to college and working a unfulfilling job. I've thought many times of moving but I'd never actually fully cut her off, even though many would say I should. Kin and Kith, it's an important thing.

Btw I had a cousin who committed suicide. We lived so far from family though; if I had known; I wish I had reached out to him, been a friend at least.