People who don't raid should really stop trying to make statements about how raiding is or how the community behaves, it's legitimately fatiguing and the baseless things they authoritatively spout can be discouraging to newer players who don't realize the source is probably intentionally misrepresenting things.
To bolster Forte's point,
I have a meme alt that I pentamelded in Tenacity materia because it was cheap and available. I have been savage raiding on it in pugs periodically for like 2 months, and haven't received so much as a comment concerning my gear. If you are competent and consistent, no one is seriously going to care about your substats.