rDPS only exists in FFLogs.
In game, it has no impact on your personal performance. I understand if you allies don't take advantage of the buff, it lowers the value of a DNC.
Outside of it, you just provide a buff and you wouldn't know how much it would contribute, simply that stacking them is good.
That's your job, you deliver the buff at the given time. What happens next is not your control, not impacted by your skill level.
rDPS is a metric used to measure your contribution to the group, not your worth.
What if you get the jobs on the lower end in your team, what if you get WAR, MCH, RDM, RPR? The rDPS will be lower, can you still say you're "punished" for it?
But when the comp includes GNB, DRK, SAM, MNK, BLM, you're "rewarded" for this choice?
rDPS isn't a good metric to evaluate a player skill.
I'm also still standing on my point, you can and must compare them.
Gear distribution is a player choice, feeding melee is a strategy, feeding a melee and buff it with dancer is a strategy one step further.
Feeding a MCH isn't a viable strategy. I don't need numbers to explain this point as we know aDPS and rDPS.
Ask yourself "why are the melee fed in the first place? Why is the dancer partner on the fed melee?"
You get the answer: because Melee gets better value out of gear and Dance partner gets additional value out of someone's else gear.