Ya the crit variances never bothered me. I'd make jokes with my static about how we need to restart the fight because my opener didn't crit, but honestly I didn't care that much especially when my non crits were hitting harder than these "auto crits" and nothing was more satisfying than getting those 50k+ crits. Also, as SlickPaws says, the irony of them wanting to adjust variances when we're not supposed to be parsing in the first place is not lost on me.