Warning for "Grief" Tactics?!

[LianaThorne]

Tagged wrong, woops.

[SturmChurro]

"If they die it's their fault."

PSA: Standing and watching someone die is your own fault. If you aren't trying to help in some form, I would consider that griefing or just that you have a severe lack of understanding of how to heal.

You try healing a player who stands in aoes one after the other, runs mechanics into other players, runs a stack marker alone to the edge of the arena, gets pushed into spikes, stands next to a tank with a tankbuster, backflips off the side, gets pushed off the side, stands in an instakill mechanic (LoTA, Amon, etc.), etc. Yes, it is their fault.

Anyway, my post history itself confirms that I do actually heal players, when I state things like "having to resort to cure 2" - this means I have used up every single other heal, and I have resorted to casting heals to keep members of my party alive.

[LianaThorne]

You try healing a player who stands in aoes one after the other, runs mechanics into other players, runs a stack marker alone to the edge of the arena, gets pushed into spikes, stands next to a tank with a tankbuster, backflips off the side, gets pushed off the side, stands in an instakill mechanic (LoTA, Amon, etc.), etc. Yes, it is their fault.

Anyway, my post history itself confirms that I do actually heal players, when I state things like "having to resort to cure 2" - this means I have used up every single other heal, and I have resorted to casting heals to keep members of my party alive.

I do. I main Sage and before 6.0 was an AST main. I make every effort to keep people alive, even if they're stepping in stuff. New people exist and need to learn mechs. Some people haven't been around in a while and forget things. I don't think anyone has the brain power to remember every dungeon perfectly. What's your point?

By standing and watching them die, it's your fault. If you try to help and they still die, then it's theirs. If you do nothing, again, that's griefing to me or shows you have a severe lack of understanding of what healing actually is. You kinda have to put in effort.

[SturmChurro]

If you try to help and they still die, then it's theirs.

Exactly what I have been saying! I'm glad we can agree.

[TaleraRistain]

You try healing a player who stands in aoes one after the other, runs mechanics into other players, runs a stack marker alone to the edge of the arena, gets pushed into spikes, stands next to a tank with a tankbuster, backflips off the side, gets pushed off the side, stands in an instakill mechanic (LoTA, Amon, etc.), etc. Yes, it is their fault.

I've healed all of that and more and I really don't see the big struggle in having to do our role when our party is less than perfect. Does it matter that it's their fault? Not to me. Maybe you just don't have the mentality for being a healer in groups with random matching where unexpected things can occur.

[SturmChurro]

I've healed all of that and more (...)

Uhh.. I don't see how when the player instantly dies in the majority of the examples I gave.

(...)even if you were to ever find out i'm not convinced you would accept it. your issues seem more fundamental aka you just... don't seem to be a good person in general.

No. You want to know what the real issue is? People who pretend to be a good person.

[VirusOnline]

No. You want to know what the real issue is? People who pretend to be a good person.

Hmm
people who pretend to be a good person is an issue, but that isn't a good excuse to be able to take some time out and evaluate our behaviour good person, inbetween person, or bad person
whether we did something bad or not and get blamed for it how we handle our reaction to that and the emotions connected to it is the most important event to processing events that are mentally impactful to us
so please, take some time to process even if you weren't in the wrong

I think that's a good way to look at it. Generally you can tell who is actually trying and who isn't. You would think if someone was putting zero effort in and wanted a free ride, they'd like being dead on the ground so they don't have to do anything.
If people are complaining about no raises, it probably means they are frustrated at not getting to participate.

Reminds me of a time when I as healing.
My rule is look this is DF, I'm not over here trying to optimize (as a sch of all things anyway ; _ ; ), idc if swiftcast is up or not if someone dies they gonna get raised as soon as I can safely do so.

6/8 of our party is dead and the other healer be over there trying to grind out glare as if his life depended on it.
The moment I tell him to help raise he literally says he's waiting for swiftcast and to mind my own business.
It is literally me and him alive and he wants to wait 60s to raise someone. You could raise 6 people in less than 60s

even events like this I have to emotionally process

[Senn]

Reminds me of a time when I as healing.
My rule is look this is DF, I'm not over here trying to optimize (as a sch of all things anyway ; _ ; ), idc if swiftcast is up or not if someone dies they gonna get raised as soon as I can safely do so.

6/8 of our party is dead and the other healer be over there trying to grind out glare as if his life depended on it.
The moment I tell him to help raise he literally says he's waiting for swiftcast and to mind my own business.
It is literally me and him alive and he wants to wait 60s to raise someone. You could raise 6 people in less than 60s

even events like this I have to emotionally process

were you partying with OP by any chance?
lol but yeah, that sounds pretty bad. It's good of you to raise when you are able to for reasons already discussed (new/returning player, trying out new job, or just being really unlucky that day. people make mistakes)
I can't imagine waiting for a 1 minute cd to raise 6 other people.

[VirusOnline]

were you partying with OP by any chance?
lol but yeah, that sounds pretty bad. It's good of you to raise when you are able to for reasons already discussed (new/returning player, trying out new job, or just being really unlucky that day. people make mistakes)
I can't imagine waiting for a 1 minute cd to raise 6 other people.

i feel like its actually quite a common behaviour that I see in PF/DF, and usually by those sporting that crown
it can feel embarassing when someone is left dead on the floor and a healer purposely doesn't raise them - it can feel like a powerplay and in other situations that might be spicey but i'm not over here trying to solo the floor and i won't let other ppl solo the floor xD

When I was new to the game I was a summoner. Yes I had the raise spell but I had totally forgotten I had it. Being a DPS and mostly solo player I had never really needed to use it UNTIL one day in a MSQ dungeon things went south and I had people screaming for me to raise the healer. My first thought was "I am a DPS I dont have a raise" then I remembered raised the healer and ate some humble pie for being an idiot. LOL

Understandable, esp as a sprout
even I have days i forget Im a healer/rdm and people die off and i just pikachu

[Myrany]

Reminds me of a time when I as healing.
My rule is look this is DF, I'm not over here trying to optimize (as a sch of all things anyway ; _ ; ), idc if swiftcast is up or not if someone dies they gonna get raised as soon as I can safely do so.

6/8 of our party is dead and the other healer be over there trying to grind out glare as if his life depended on it.
The moment I tell him to help raise he literally says he's waiting for swiftcast and to mind my own business.
It is literally me and him alive and he wants to wait 60s to raise someone. You could raise 6 people in less than 60s

even events like this I have to emotionally process

When I was new to the game I was a summoner. Yes I had the raise spell but I had totally forgotten I had it. Being a DPS and mostly solo player I had never really needed to use it UNTIL one day in a MSQ dungeon things went south and I had people screaming for me to raise the healer. My first thought was "I am a DPS I dont have a raise" then I remembered raised the healer and ate some humble pie for being an idiot. LOL