It feels punishing to care about this game

[Caurcas]

On these forums specifically people tend to label anyone with an unpopular, or just strong opinion that goes against the grain a troll. Its base tribalism. Also, while I heavily criticize the game, I've also kept a running sub for seven years now and have put about 7,500 hours into it. I like the game, heck I love the game. Its probably one of my favorite, but as with loving anything when it takes a turn for what you see as a negative or bad path you want to do everything within your power to stop it and let your voice be heard. Reddit, Discord, etc... also have these problems.

[KageTokage]

On these forums specifically people tend to label anyone with an unpopular, or just strong opinion that goes against the grain a troll. Its base tribalism. Also, while I heavily criticize the game, I've also kept a running sub for seven years now and have put about 7,500 hours into it. I like the game, heck I love the game. Its probably one of my favorite, but as with loving anything when it takes a turn for what you see as a negative or bad path you want to do everything within your power to stop it and let your voice be heard. Reddit, Discord, etc... also have these problems.

Yeah...people oft don't seem to realize that the ones who complain more tend to also be the ones that are more passionate about the game and desire for it be as good as possible, rather then just good enough.

[Connor]

The OP is unhappy that players within the community can be rude and passive-aggressive…so people post a bunch of rude and passive-aggressive replies? Kinda proving their point just a bit lol

My advice to OP is - as others have said - that the impression of the game-community you find online (i.e official forums, Reddit, etc) is pretty drastically different from what you’ll find in-game. In my experience playing since 1.0 it’s pretty rare that you’ll be harassed or abuse or otherwise by players while playing, at least in most normal content.

I mean, even at times where someone probably should say something to a party member (E.g ice Mage, healer not touching dps spells, bard that doesn’t sing etc) everyone just get on with it and maybe talk about it in fc chat or whatever lol.

[Lunalepsy]

I come to express how frustrating for me it has been to play this game and engaging with the community.

Opinions are opinions you can agree or disagree it doesn't matter, but this game's community has a weird thing about opinions, atleast when it comes to the NA playerbase. Looking at the forums and engaging in some discord discussions people tend to be either very passive agressive or just very sarcastic, and neither are very pleasant. I've seen a few people here in the forums being polite about their answers but the most prominent tend to be meme responses or just straight up twitter dunking. At one point I started to feel like there was no other way of answering to opinions until I looked through the japanese forums and they are all usually very polite, maybe this forums and other community sides spend too much time on twitter? Im not sure.

Secondly of why its been so frustrating is that I have a lot of complaints about this game and not only does it feel bad having to deal with the passive agressive crowd but there's little to no dev interaction, its as if the devs don't read the forums anymore but then that's not really true either, they are just very picky about what they decide to do. Last crowned post we had was about one msq quest being too hard for the casual crowd, devs seem to not care about a lot of the other complaint posts that get a lot of traction.

It kinda doesn't matter if you have feedback about this game unless it also bothers the casual public it seems, and even tho the healer forums keeps asking to have healers be more than glare mages and general discussion that dungeons feel like a joke especially in old content there's gonna be no answer from the devs about that and anyone who wants to raise its voice is gonna have to put up with a lot of meme or sarcastic responses.

It's hard to care about this game.

You're not wrong! People in this game are very passive aggressive and sarcastic. Tread with caution!

[TaleraRistain]

At one point I started to feel like there was no other way of answering to opinions until I looked through the japanese forums and they are all usually very polite, maybe this forums and other community sides spend too much time on twitter? Im not sure.

You're not encountering a difference in levels of toxicity here. You're running into a culture difference. NA prefer to be open about their insults. JP will say something that seems polite but is just as insulting.

You are going to encounter people who aren't going to respond in the way that you expect or want them to, but that is going to happen in life in general. I agree with the second poster. If it's affecting you that badly, then step away for a bit. Also, keep in mind that even if people don't put their response in the way you expect, it doesn't mean they don't also care about the game. A couple of your phrases are being judgmental in the exact way that you're complaining about, so it doesn't seem that you feel they may also care about the game.

[Theodric]

As someone who has been consistently posting on this forum since the days of ARR? I agree with you.

There is a very vocal portion of the community that simply cannot handle differing opinions or suggestions that the game could, perhaps, do things differently. These same individuals will, in some cases, resort to death threats and campaigns of harassment over something as innocent as liking or disliking the 'wrong' fictional characters. It used to be largely confined to Twitter and Reddit, though in recent years it has unfortunately bled into this place as well.

I'd strongly suggest making ample use of the ignore function. By all means, feel free to take a break every now and then but in my humble opinion nobody should concede to such people by allowing themselves to be driven away. Especially since at times, suggestions made around these parts do end up making it into the game itself.

[SturmChurro]

The forums seem to be the de facto hang out for people that don't particularly like the game. Which is a bit odd really, given you have to pay to be here.

I don't think that's necessarily true. A lot of people who complain or criticize it here actually care about the game.

[Floortank]

Secondly of why its been so frustrating is that I have a lot of complaints about this game and not only does it feel bad having to deal with the passive agressive crowd but there's little to no dev interaction, its as if the devs don't read the forums anymore but then that's not really true either, they are just very picky about what they decide to do. Last crowned post we had was about one msq quest being too hard for the casual crowd, devs seem to not care about a lot of the other complaint posts that get a lot of traction.

I feel you on this. Know that before you read the rest of my reply.

But, there's a few things about your approach you've got to take a look at.

1) The average MMO player is an addict. And the truth of one addict is the truth of all addicts. If you try to get in the way of their fix, or harsh their buzz, they are not going to want to hear what you have to say. I know that is not what you are out to do. You aren't out to take anyone's game away. I'm saying that they will respond to any sort of criticism on the game as a criticism on themselves and their addiction. It is an irrational response, so know that this response really isn't aimed at you or the validity of your opinions. These sorts of responses are indeed intended to completely ignore or deflect from your concerns. They are disingenuous responses, not actual engagement.

2) As an addendum to 1, some of these people will aggressively go out of the way to defend the game with very little credibility by way of logic or game development experience. They do this simply because they feel that it hurts them to see any criticism of the game, as criticism toward the game forces them to consider why they play it. And an addict loses their buzz if they stop to consider how little they get out of it in the first place.

3) People stuck in a pattern of repeating behavior who have stopped having fun a long time ago, are generally miserable people to talk to. This unfortunately covers a lot of the people you're going to meet on an MMO. You will also meet friendly people who are not miserable and burnt out. Only tell your opinions to the latter group, not the former.

4) Lastly, people playing the game must generally be considered as people who enjoy the game, and most people don't put much thought into why they have fun. They just have fun. These aren't the sort of people who are going to be open to hearing about how other people aren't having fun. This can loop back into point 1.

First off, look for friendly people who care about what you have to say before you voice complaints. Not everyone is open to them. Second, look for people complaining about what you also think is worth criticizing and support their arguments with your own experience. Lastly, never be afraid of complaining on a forum. It is what it is for.

Hope things turn around for you.

[Lauront]

These same individuals will, in some cases, resort to death threats and campaigns of harassment over something as innocent as liking or disliking the 'wrong' fictional characters.

Yes, even resorting to blatantly emotionally manipulative language and feigning distress, while projecting their own behaviours onto others. It's quite something to behold.

[Beytran70]

It's pretty much the same in all Forums. The only people who would bother coming here either have something particular to say (good OR bad), enjoy the drama, or just lurk and read.