ELI5: Why the absolute hell did SE not use Azure or AWS as a temporary solution?

[Rhysati]

They still got to play and didn't get kicked after six+ hours in queue. That's still an improvement over this shit show.

You clearly haven't played it.

Destiny 2 runs on AWS and costs $0/mo.
For Honor runs on AWS and costs $0/mo.
The Division 2 runs on AWS and costs $0/mo.

None of those are MMOs. They all use lobby-systems and instancing.