Oh I've seen plenty suggest there are no bad apples, or that the bad apples "aren't part of the community" - as if somehow they're not playing XIV the same as everyone else, involving themselves in the game's community by doing so.
And I've also been playing MMOs a long time. Most communities are actually overwhelmingly chill and nice, but once you start getting into particular segments of the community as a whole, you start finding the rancid elements.
This is just as true of WoW - the one time I gave the free trial a try, I didn't see a whole lot of open hostility and idiocy in chat. Does that mean it wasn't there? Nope. Just means it isn't the only thing people will come across, despite what basically everyone who has and hasn't played WoW will try to claim otherwise.
As to open hostility vs passive aggression, I'm just gonna leave Theodric's quote here - he sums it up best:
Considering the sheer insanity I've personally seen in the RP communities on Balmung and Mateus alike, I'd gladly take some open (and reportable!) hostility over this high school drama bull people take part in.