"Everyone's so open and friendly" is a lie

[Kuya420]

It's called have a civil discussion, or debate. You don't need a fight or argument to get our point across...if you do, you may want to revisit how you respond to different situations and adjust your attitude accordingly. Getting mad isn't the only option available to people.

ok, so what if you try to be nice first, and they ignore, or blame someone else for their own mistake? at what point can you start correcting them, because there are people that think they can do no wrong, and these types, the moment they get called out they get defensive "fine, tank it yourself" when all that was said was to stop jumping ahead when i, the healer was at zero mana and they couldnt be bothered to pay attention to that, when i play tank i pay attention to positioning of the mobs, the healers mana, my cooldowns, so i dont think thats a lot to pay attention to, 3 things that you can look for at a glance, but how should we, with these new policies, deal with people such as these?

[StriderShinryu]

but how should we, with these new policies, deal with people such as these?

Exactly the same way you've dealt with them before? I mean, as SE clarified, the policies aren't at all new. The only addition was a few examples with the actual new stuff being about RMTs and DF use. Plus, GMs who receive reports are to look at the context of the exchange. So if you didn't have any issues before you won't now. If you got in trouble before, you will now.
While it's true that the policy being re-posted may let more know what is and isn't against the ToS, the ToS itself hasn't actually changed in that regard.
If you're going to give direction, even firm direction, be nice about it. If the person on the receiving end isn't taking that direction then you have the same tools to deal with it you've had for years now. Trying to re-state the direction, trying to clarify your position, using vote/kick/abandon, etc.

[Kaurhz]

so.. you say anecdotal evidence doesnt always reflect what everyone else experiences....then proceed to provide anecdotal evidence yourself? the only thing they are trying to say is that people need to be allowed to have civil discourse where you can talk out your problems like human beings, we arent all children that need babysitters watching our every move are we? is anyone here so soft and weak that they cant have a quarrel with a friend and make up? id say you arent friends at all if thats the case because friends argue all the time, sometimes about trivial stuff but they move on from it, its like if you were in your house arguing with a parent, spouse, friend, or sibling, then the police show up to separate you so you dont argue anymore, without being called and yes, sometimes in some situations that can help, but you dont use a sledgehammer on a nail, now do you? thats all, i think thats being said here

The problem with 'civil discourse' in a constructive manner as to create a debate is that a lot of people are unable to separate themselves from the personal side of things, of which you very quickly just harbour an environment where nothing meaningful results from it, barring an adhominem fest.

Not mention the simple fact of the matter of what behaviours you encourage with such leniency around rules. Every community has their own issues, and such things would only create more issues. Rules do exist for a reason, and a perfectly good reason.

In fact I would posit the simple question to you, or anyone for that matter - Do you genuinely believe that the vast majority of a community could openly embrace such a change as to keep conversation even remotely constructive without it turning into a game of insult flicking.

Edit: This of course wrests under the assumption that civil discourse is against the terms of service - Which it isn't unless your purpose of civil discourse is to publicly air your distaste in another person by insulting them or by outright calling their argument stupid. Both of which are counterproductive to any form of dialogue.

[elizeugba]

People exaggerate on this subject on both sides, some say everything is perfect and the community is flawless, other people say it is horrible and toxic.

From my experience, the FF community is pretty good for the most part, and what I mean by "pretty good" is as "pretty good" as it gets, after all, we are humans and there are a lot of ppl out there that are just obnoxious. People create unreasonable expectations that go against human nature. What did you expect? a perfect place where you never saw toxicity? that the game somehow transformed the toxic pieces of sh*t into decent people? All SE can do is enforce the TOS on them, and that's all.

Anyone expecting a perfect community (or near-perfect) is just delusional, it is literally impossible to have that in any community as big as FF or any online game.

If you think FF community is bad you never played FPS games and MOBAs.

[elizeugba]

Let me tell you something, I live in a family where passive aggressive behavior thrives.

Yeah but this is not your family, here you can just leave the group/FC and block them.

[Lunalepsy]

This thread is on fire! So many people :P

[Vahlnir]

This thread is on fire!

[Elladie]

Noone is asking you to out up with anything just saying what your calling unstable,cruel, or trolling isnt thats the joy of gaming there is supposed to be no "normality".

Games give choices you can block,ignore etc a person however you would rather not use the system giving. Instead you use the game makers rules to shove your real life normal bs on people making gaming more and more into everone being the same and drone like behavior.
As I said before people cursing at another is heat of the moment, plus could be stressing over real life bs using the game as an escape.

Maybe if you want normality dont go into virtual things and stay on the sports bs

I'm prone to swearing (something I now need to watch because I have a three year old granddaughter and I mean proper, expressive Anglo Saxon swearing). Burn my hand, yup, I swear. Get annoyed by someone's idiocy at work? Yup, I'll call them a dozen rude words in my head.

IN MY HEAD.

Because they probably didn't mean to be an idiot and just because I don't know them well personally - or often at all after Covid - is absolutely no reason to be rude or offensive.

As far as I can recall, I have never deliberately sworn at another person or called them a rude name. I even apologise to the dog if I swear at her when she pees in the house. So I guess that makes me passive-aggressive by definitions being used here. I think it just makes me polite.

Yeah I'll swear under my breath when someone in game does (insert in game equivalent of idiocy here) but I have too much self-respect (and life experience) to think being offensive solves anything. It just makes things worse. I'll either try to offer a resolution as calmly as possible or I'll walk away.

[Floortank]

People exaggerate on this subject on both sides, some say everything is perfect and the community is flawless,

Literally never seen anyone say this.

Saying the community is good is not saying it is perfect and flawless.

[HyperSMB]

I have found it varies greatly based on the group. Some are amazing and helpful. Others quite pathetic.

I find people tend to act the worst in dungeon wipes (Which to be fair, are exceedingly infrequent). I am weird, I find them refreshing and funny.