"Everyone's so open and friendly" is a lie

[Kyrj]

It's called have a civil discussion, or debate. You don't need a fight or argument to get our point across...if you do, you may want to revisit how you respond to different situations and adjust your attitude accordingly. Getting mad isn't the only option available to people.

And if someone does get mad? Not like it's an emotion that never happens in people.

[Kuya420]

It's called have a civil discussion, or debate. You don't need a fight or argument to get our point across...if you do, you may want to revisit how you respond to different situations and adjust your attitude accordingly. Getting mad isn't the only option available to people.

ok, so what if you try to be nice first, and they ignore, or blame someone else for their own mistake? at what point can you start correcting them, because there are people that think they can do no wrong, and these types, the moment they get called out they get defensive "fine, tank it yourself" when all that was said was to stop jumping ahead when i, the healer was at zero mana and they couldnt be bothered to pay attention to that, when i play tank i pay attention to positioning of the mobs, the healers mana, my cooldowns, so i dont think thats a lot to pay attention to, 3 things that you can look for at a glance, but how should we, with these new policies, deal with people such as these?

[StriderShinryu]

but how should we, with these new policies, deal with people such as these?

Exactly the same way you've dealt with them before? I mean, as SE clarified, the policies aren't at all new. The only addition was a few examples with the actual new stuff being about RMTs and DF use. Plus, GMs who receive reports are to look at the context of the exchange. So if you didn't have any issues before you won't now. If you got in trouble before, you will now.
While it's true that the policy being re-posted may let more know what is and isn't against the ToS, the ToS itself hasn't actually changed in that regard.
If you're going to give direction, even firm direction, be nice about it. If the person on the receiving end isn't taking that direction then you have the same tools to deal with it you've had for years now. Trying to re-state the direction, trying to clarify your position, using vote/kick/abandon, etc.

[Leifei]

It's called have a civil discussion, or debate. You don't need a fight or argument to get our point across...if you do, you may want to revisit how you respond to different situations and adjust your attitude accordingly. Getting mad isn't the only option available to people.

This right here. Couldn't agree more.

[Liam_Harper]

Why be aggressive at all, either passive or argumentatively? People tend to react defensively to aggression anyway, which is counter-productive to achieving any sort of understanding. If you have a problem to resolve it's possible to simply discuss it like adults and work it out. If the person you have a problem with refuses to listen, there are no rules against kicking them and if they react aggressively, the ToS actually works against them.

Basically, you can do fine in life without having to argue or being rude.

[Ryaz]

Why be aggressive at all, either passive or argumentatively? People tend to react defensively to aggression anyway, which is counter-productive to achieving any sort of understanding. If you have a problem to resolve it's possible to simply discuss it like adults and work it out. If the person you have a problem with refuses to listen, there are no rules against kicking them and if they react aggressively, the ToS actually works against them.

Basically, you can do fine in life without having to argue or being rude.

Yep, saw this in an MSQ roulette of all things last week. One of our tanks accidentally provoked Ultima and the other tank went off on him for it. Like verbal attacks, calling him trash, etc. Then the other tank responded defensively as expected and and used a curse word. They both could have that could have gotten banned despite the first guy starting it.

All over a provoke in an MSQ roulette. One of the easiest instances in the game. The rest of the group couldn't believe it.

[KizuyaKatogami]

After having been here since June or July I can say this is the biggest lie that this game's player base tells and I am sick of it. This entire problem is promoted by the heavy handedness of this games harassment policies, making it impossible to have fights and arguments in a attempt to resolve problems that instead encourages passive aggressive behavior that is just as detrimental if not worse. At least when there is fights and arguments people know where another stands, what the problem is instead of attempting to ghost and being child like. If someone has done something wrong, no matter how petty one may perceive it no one is allowed to be critical.

I am absolutely disgusted, and I hate this concept of people wanting to talk, be social and make friends one minute but without warning having done nothing people suddenly refuse to speak. It's flat out hypocritical and disingenuous.

I agree with this 100% in all the years i’ve been playing and it’s why i have a firm stance that this game is no less toxic than WoW is, it’s just a different breed. WoW toxicity is more blunt whereas 14’s toxicity is more with the passive aggressive behind your back kind of toxicity which is just as bad if not worse imo. It doesn’t help either that recent policies are just so strict in what you can say or do and that a lot of people in this community have paper thin skin and are incredibly sensitive as to the point if you even try to give any form of advice they take it as a personal attack and harassment. I don’t see it changing anytime soon sadly enough.

[Xaruko_Nexume]

I don't think the OP is wrong, having also started in June. But I also don't think it's a bad thing. There was this group of players I met that seemed like such good friends on the surface but underneath it was like an episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey meets the Tutors, or Mean Girls haha. The amount of backstabbing, fake smiles, cheating and lying is astonishing. I've witnessed two real life relationships end over drama in this game since June lol.

I STILL prefer it over the blatant aggressiveness and ism's I encountered in WoW for 16 years.

Also I would still say the game isn't toxic in such that people aren't rude in dungeons or just terrible towards you. If the rules are the only thing keeping it this way, then so be it. I'll take it.

[FoxyAreku]

Always been a believer that there really is no difference between game fandoms, all of them have people. And the average person is pretty unpleasant to be around.