"Everyone's so open and friendly" is a lie

[Razdazim]

After having been here since June or July I can say this is the biggest lie that this game's player base tells and I am sick of it. This entire problem is promoted by the heavy handedness of this games harassment policies, making it impossible to have fights and arguments in a attempt to resolve problems that instead encourages passive aggressive behavior that is just as detrimental if not worse. At least when there is fights and arguments people know where another stands, what the problem is instead of attempting to ghost and being child like. If someone has done something wrong, no matter how petty one may perceive it no one is allowed to be critical.

I am absolutely disgusted, and I hate this concept of people wanting to talk, be social and make friends one minute but without warning having done nothing people suddenly refuse to speak. It's flat out hypocritical and disingenuous.

[Jeeqbit]

Most people are open and friendly, but it's true that some people are not. The heavy-handed harassment policies help to motivate the people who are not to be more polite.

Passive-aggressiveness is better than flat out saying something rude in my opinion.

[Nanchi]

I really don't think it's the policies fault for people to be passive aggressive, they will always be with or without policies. This goes for every community, rules help silence truly toxic people, but it won't stop the 70% less "toxic" people to behave like adults.
Been playing the game for 8 years and I had overwhelmingly positive experience but that is because I left every circle asap that seemed very immature and drama seeking. Trust me, changing the rules will not change peoples behaviors and personality. It's just a matter of being able to weed out the really dodgy ones in order to find normal folks to play with.

[Razdazim]

Most people are open and friendly, but it's true that some people are not. The heavy-handed harassment policies help to motivate the people who are not to be more polite.

Passive-aggressiveness is better than flat out saying something rude in my opinion.

Let me tell you something, I live in a family where passive aggressive behavior thrives. It creates the same problems as being rude, expect when people openly speak and get called out for being rude sometimes apologies happen. Apologies never happen with passive aggressive behavior as it makes things fester creating resentment on both sides. This attitude is a blight upon modern society because no one has enough guts to deal with problems like adults and sit down to discuss problems.

[Ozzmal]

Im sorry you've had a bad experience, but its important to remember that anecdotal evidence doesn't always reflect what everyone else experiences. My time has been very pleasant, I can count on one hand the number of times ive seen people being rude or even silent after a wipe that was my fault. Most of the time I simply explain my mistake and people seem to be perfectly fine with it. My experiences are anecdotal as well, clearly, but it does fall in line with the reputation that the game is known for. Ive seen very toxic games, I really dont mind them that much myself, but honestly that kind of thing makes a video game worse. Jerks being forced to remain silent in a game is quite a different situation than families who cant communicate. But regardless I hope your experience improves, and if you ever want a friendly party member who wont be passive aggressive, feel free to add me to your friends and we can run some content if your on Primal =)

[Avatre]

It's called have a civil discussion, or debate. You don't need a fight or argument to get our point across...if you do, you may want to revisit how you respond to different situations and adjust your attitude accordingly. Getting mad isn't the only option available to people.

[Liam_Harper]

Why be aggressive at all, either passive or argumentatively? People tend to react defensively to aggression anyway, which is counter-productive to achieving any sort of understanding. If you have a problem to resolve it's possible to simply discuss it like adults and work it out. If the person you have a problem with refuses to listen, there are no rules against kicking them and if they react aggressively, the ToS actually works against them.

Basically, you can do fine in life without having to argue or being rude.

[Lauront]

Most people are open and friendly, but it's true that some people are not. The heavy-handed harassment policies help to motivate the people who are not to be more polite.

Passive-aggressiveness is better than flat out saying something rude in my opinion.

I beg to differ.

[KizuyaKatogami]

After having been here since June or July I can say this is the biggest lie that this game's player base tells and I am sick of it. This entire problem is promoted by the heavy handedness of this games harassment policies, making it impossible to have fights and arguments in a attempt to resolve problems that instead encourages passive aggressive behavior that is just as detrimental if not worse. At least when there is fights and arguments people know where another stands, what the problem is instead of attempting to ghost and being child like. If someone has done something wrong, no matter how petty one may perceive it no one is allowed to be critical.

I am absolutely disgusted, and I hate this concept of people wanting to talk, be social and make friends one minute but without warning having done nothing people suddenly refuse to speak. It's flat out hypocritical and disingenuous.

I agree with this 100% in all the years i’ve been playing and it’s why i have a firm stance that this game is no less toxic than WoW is, it’s just a different breed. WoW toxicity is more blunt whereas 14’s toxicity is more with the passive aggressive behind your back kind of toxicity which is just as bad if not worse imo. It doesn’t help either that recent policies are just so strict in what you can say or do and that a lot of people in this community have paper thin skin and are incredibly sensitive as to the point if you even try to give any form of advice they take it as a personal attack and harassment. I don’t see it changing anytime soon sadly enough.

[Xaruko_Nexume]

I don't think the OP is wrong, having also started in June. But I also don't think it's a bad thing. There was this group of players I met that seemed like such good friends on the surface but underneath it was like an episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey meets the Tutors, or Mean Girls haha. The amount of backstabbing, fake smiles, cheating and lying is astonishing. I've witnessed two real life relationships end over drama in this game since June lol.

I STILL prefer it over the blatant aggressiveness and ism's I encountered in WoW for 16 years.

Also I would still say the game isn't toxic in such that people aren't rude in dungeons or just terrible towards you. If the rules are the only thing keeping it this way, then so be it. I'll take it.