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  1. #131
    Player Kolaina's Avatar
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    Sep 2013
    Posts
    1,070
    Character
    Hazy Dreams
    World
    Balmung
    Main Class
    Marauder Lv 90
    Quote Originally Posted by Illmaeran View Post
    Here's another real life example. I went through nearly a year of incredibly intense chemotherapy a couple of years ago. Due to that I've got cognitive impairment, as in my brain no longer works as quickly or as flexibly as before and my reflexes are shot. This means I can no longer play Dragoon in a group setting as I simply can't do the rotation, keep track of positionals, and stay out of the bad. In short; since coming back to the game I've had to stop playing the class I've mained since 2014 when in groups. This absolutely kills me as I LOVE Dragoon, but to avoid catching pushback from strangers, "being mediocre" or "passable", or, God Forbid, not be able to get through a boss encounter no matter how many times I try it, I've stopped.

    Now, tell me why in the world I should have had to make this choice. I'll tell you why, because people like you who hate on "casuals", "lessers", "noobs", etc complaining about people who aren't, and my never be, playing up to your expectations and ruining your enjoyment. You know what? Having to quit playing the class I love to avoid catching flak ruins my enjoyment. You will never know if the person on the other side of the screen is doing their best or completely slacking off so have some empathy and relax.
    People like me? And i would know if there was communication. People in general wont crap on someone with an impairment. Ive run into people myself at the very least claiming to play with one hand. What can i do? I sit back, take the run as it is. People are not talking about those with actual issues preventing them from doing certain things. People are talking, as i said in my post you are quoting, those who are “content” with mediocrity. Those who can do better but choose not to.
    Don’t try and villify me because you gave up a class you love. People with legitimate issues also don’t excuse those who lazily get by. Or again, those who enable bad play, excusing it because X reason. There are always exceptions to the rule. But people need to communicate and you’d be surprised how welcoming and accepting people generally are.
    Far more than those throwing around hateful terms such as “people like you”
    (14)

  2. #132
    Player
    Payadopa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    2,336
    Character
    Payadopa Astraya
    World
    Spriggan
    Main Class
    Conjurer Lv 71
    Quote Originally Posted by Kolaina View Post
    What else is silly is not striving to become better. Being content with mediocrity.
    Generally people won’t touch a comment with real life situations as you have included. But we are talking about a video game. Not the icu. In a video game you are given challenges to overcome. Overcoming challenges requires some form of progression, including personal skill level. Some people choose to get better. Strive to get better. Others are content as being passable, even if barely. Then there’s the enablers. The people who say “they’re doing fine” to healers that spam only medica 2 or yo tanks who pull a pack at a time. The 80 BLM doin a 50 rotation.
    Self righteousness. Lol. Coming from the side that stands against those who ask for people to look higher. To reach for just a little more
    Dude, it's DF. It's boring and not worth the effort to get worked up about it. For better or worse people outside the forums don't care. Make a PF and chill.
    (3)

  3. #133
    Player Kolaina's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    1,070
    Character
    Hazy Dreams
    World
    Balmung
    Main Class
    Marauder Lv 90
    Quote Originally Posted by Payadopa View Post
    Dude, it's DF. It's boring and not worth the effort to get worked up about it. For better or worse people outside the forums don't care. Make a PF and chill.
    Chill. People literally in here starting threads over duty finder experiences. Over differences of play. But chill. I see you replying as well. Taking a side. Speaking against those who disagree with you. Pot, meet kettle. The whole “make a party finder” argument as well goes both ways. I queue up for df and i take what i get. Doesn’t prevent me from having expectations that people put in some effort. Not like there’s people saying you need to be raid raid tier in expert roulette. But at least try a cohesive rotation with effort beyond potato.
    Also, I’m not worked up. I find the forums more entertains than the game itself. You want to see worked up, pull during cutscene. People will get worked up. What goes on in these threads is a minor reaction when compared to the actual event at times.
    One side says “try a bit”, or “get better”. The other side, the one you haven’t told to chill says “I’ll let people die”, along with “don’t like it, don’t play”.
    K bud
    (10)

  4. #134
    Player
    Nishira's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2021
    Posts
    144
    Character
    Ninuriel Elonir
    World
    Phoenix
    Main Class
    Conjurer Lv 68
    Quote Originally Posted by Kolaina View Post
    What else is silly is not striving to become better. Being content with mediocrity.
    Sincere question. Why is that bad?

    I get what you mean from a personal viewpoint. I enjoy learning. I like growing. I have fun figuring stuff out, seeing how things work together, understanding synergies. But if that’s not someone’s cup of tea it doesn’t bother me. We’re different there, ok. There’s more to people than whether they are driven to excel in a videogame, and out of all the characteristics someone can have I don’t find it a particularly interesting trait either.

    My personal experiences with people who lacked that particular drive have been extremely positive overall. They’d be generous with their time and help. They’d be social and kind. They had a great sense of humour and doing dungeons with them was a hoot. I felt blessed for knowing them, and spending time with them.

    If anything, I’d say they excelled in humanity. And that beats parses by a thousand, a million, an infinite amount of miles for me. I don’t excuse anything. To me it’s simply the sum of a person. And there is so much more to them than this one thing. With strangers I simply assume it may be the exact same thing.

    I fully understand that for you this is something that sits not well with you. We’re different there, ok. But perhaps you can see how people value things differently, and will draw different conclusions based on that.
    (3)

  5. #135
    Player
    Valkyrie_Lenneth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Limsa Lominsa
    Posts
    8,038
    Character
    Lynne Asteria
    World
    Jenova
    Main Class
    Viper Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by Nishira View Post
    Sincere question. Why is that bad?

    I get what you mean from a personal viewpoint. I enjoy learning. I like growing. I have fun figuring stuff out, seeing how things work together, understanding synergies. But if that’s not someone’s cup of tea it doesn’t bother me. We’re different there, ok. There’s more to people than whether they are driven to excel in a videogame, and out of all the characteristics someone can have I don’t find it a particularly interesting trait either.

    My personal experiences with people who lacked that particular drive have been extremely positive overall. They’d be generous with their time and help. They’d be social and kind. They had a great sense of humour and doing dungeons with them was a hoot. I felt blessed for knowing them, and spending time with them.

    If anything, I’d say they excelled in humanity. And that beats parses by a thousand, a million, an infinite amount of miles for me. I don’t excuse anything. To me it’s simply the sum of a person. And there is so much more to them than this one thing. With strangers I simply assume it may be the exact same thing.

    I fully understand that for you this is something that sits not well with you. We’re different there, ok. But perhaps you can see how people value things differently, and will draw different conclusions based on that.
    I guess a lot of people's problem here is, without any communication, it just seems like people are being lazy in a team game. You aren't playing with npcs, but other people.

    If a dps is doing 10% of the damage in a dungeon, that means 3 other people are picking up the slack. How is that fair to them?

    No one is saying you need to be try harding, but when you are clearly not even pushing buttons, then I have an issue.

    You can do more damage by just pressing your combo buttons in order than quite a percentage of df players.
    (8)
    Last edited by Valkyrie_Lenneth; 10-19-2021 at 07:47 AM.

  6. #136
    Player Kolaina's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    1,070
    Character
    Hazy Dreams
    World
    Balmung
    Main Class
    Marauder Lv 90
    Quote Originally Posted by Nishira View Post
    snip
    I’ll be honest. At first i scoffed at your question. But following your post history, I’ll take you seriously.
    There may be a point where every player is mediocre. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. There comes a point where many people are learning, whether it be a new duty, new mechanics or a new class. There may even be a certain level of comfort, or rather, lack there of. Especially when in learning phases. My personal problem, is those who do not try to get better. The far below average, going to barely attempt, because….. someone else will get me through it.
    The people who put in little to no effort are leeches. The ones who can try but don’t want to. This game, aside from raiding, (24 man content is not raiding), is design in such a way that the content can be cleared with 50% of the party being dead weight. While its possible, its not fair to the people who are putting in the effort dragging those people across the finish line. In fact, out right disrespectful.
    I’ll give an example. A tank, I forget which class exactly, in paradigm had decided its “more fun”, literally his words, to stand in aoes. To not use cool downs. To not even make an attempt. When i asked them why they would go out of their way to make it harder on their healers, i got cussed out because I don’t pay their sub. That i was an elitist. Simply for asking why no effort. 1 experience of many
    There comes a point where a person should be able to carry their weight. To contribute the same as they expect from the other party members. Not be dragged to their success off someone else’s effort. Off everybody’s effort but their own. And lately, I’ve seen a lot of that. 80 melees doing no more than their 1,2,3 single target rotation. Paired with whm co healers who only medica 2. Its ok for them to play that way means its ok for them to use others.
    The bar i set in expectation for others isn’t very high. I don’t parse (console) so I can’t get too into peoples numbers. But when a person is without question, not trying, there is an issue.
    (5)

  7. #137
    Player
    Nishira's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2021
    Posts
    144
    Character
    Ninuriel Elonir
    World
    Phoenix
    Main Class
    Conjurer Lv 68
    Quote Originally Posted by Valkyrie_Lenneth View Post
    If a dps is doing 10% of the damage in a dungeon, that means 3 other people are picking up the slack. How is that fair to them?
    I think fair or unfair is just a really alien concept to me in this sense. If someone is afk, or obviously trolling, sure I don’t appreciate that. In all other cases I’ll assume they’re trying, and when it’s great, wonderful, and when it’s not, we’ll be alright anyway. I understand the necessity of gatekeeping actually hard content, and expecting a certain amount of competence there. But if it’s not hard, if it’s laughably easy as so many suggest with DF, why worry so much about carrying someone?

    If it’d be someone you like, you’d probably do it in a heartbeat and just accept that ok, they’re not the best player but no sweat, I got this. Fair or unfair doesn’t apply then. To me it seems a great deal more enjoyable to extend the same sort of friendly goodwill to strangers because you can, than denying them because they don’t pull their weight. In the first thing there is a shared joy, in the other judgement. This is obviously from my perspective, and you may experience this entirely differently
    (1)

  8. #138
    Player
    ForteNightshade's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Limsa Lominsa
    Posts
    3,613
    Character
    Kurenai Tenshi
    World
    Cactuar
    Main Class
    Paladin Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by Nishira View Post
    I think fair or unfair is just a really alien concept to me in this sense. If someone is afk, or obviously trolling, sure I don’t appreciate that. In all other cases I’ll assume they’re trying, and when it’s great, wonderful, and when it’s not, we’ll be alright anyway. I understand the necessity of gatekeeping actually hard content, and expecting a certain amount of competence there. But if it’s not hard, if it’s laughably easy as so many suggest with DF, why worry so much about carrying someone?

    If it’d be someone you like, you’d probably do it in a heartbeat and just accept that ok, they’re not the best player but no sweat, I got this. Fair or unfair doesn’t apply then. To me it seems a great deal more enjoyable to extend the same sort of friendly goodwill to strangers because you can, than denying them because they don’t pull their weight. In the first thing there is a shared joy, in the other judgement. This is obviously from my perspective, and you may experience this entirely differently
    Because people don't like having their time wasted due to someone else's laziness. The fact dungeons are laughably easy only makes the lack of willingness some people have to give a damn stand out even more. It's simply disrespectful, especially when it's blatantly obvious. For example sake, I recently had a freestyle Samurai in Doma Castle. He literally never touched Midare; never even put up Shifu and stopped to just auto-attack on occasion. When I happened to go AFK as the loot timer ticked down, he ran ahead, pulled the last boss and then chimed in he hadn't been paying attention because he'd been chatting with friends on discord. So here we have someone that made the dungeon needlessly long because he kept alt-tabbing to his discord friends and couldn't give a damn we carried what was essentially deadweight though the whole dungeon.

    Can't say I wasn't satisfied to see that Vote Dismiss go through.
    (9)
    "Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls and ask the ghosts if honor matters."
    "The silence is your answer."


  9. #139
    Player Rinhi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2020
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    938
    Character
    Rinh Neftereh
    World
    Excalibur
    Main Class
    Monk Lv 90
    Quote Originally Posted by Nishira View Post
    But if it’s not hard, if it’s laughably easy as so many suggest with DF, why worry so much about carrying someone?
    because it adds a considerable amount of time to things as dungeons, trials or raids
    because it means that player will most likely continue to get carried through content and be a burden to others
    because it means that player does not want to put in a modicum of effort into learning their class (50+ content)

    toxic positivity isn't a good mindset to have. it downplays problems, it enables bad behaviour/habits and it invalidates the opinions, experiences and other things by people that think differently, as seen by the various proponents in this and other similar threads
    (8)

  10. #140
    Player
    Nishira's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2021
    Posts
    144
    Character
    Ninuriel Elonir
    World
    Phoenix
    Main Class
    Conjurer Lv 68
    Thank you for your answer Kolaina, and I do get your point. I think you may have experienced more (rightful) annoyance than I, simply because if I can’t be arsed to deal with the unpredictability of strangers I’ll stay far away from group content, and only sign up for it when I feel I can handle anything thrown my way lightheartedly

    I still find it tricky tho, because how does one come to the conclusion someone is just really not even trying? Not so great play doesn’t automically imply that. It can but there may be perfectly understandable reasons. And while I understand your point with Illmaeran, I also understand if someone doesn’t want to state at the start of each run: this is my issue. In a way a videogame is also an escape from rl issues, or it may feel like asking for a pity carry each time.

    I’d cry a bit on the inside if another whm only used Medica II, I really would haha. All these beautiful, amazing abilities… And I’m not denying you, and others who look at this the same way, are fully justified in it at times. But sometimes these discussions feel like a lot of people who don’t play optimally would be looked at that way. And I think that would not be fair on both sides tbh, it would paint both sides in too dark a light and not do anyone justice.
    (1)

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