Long story short... calling people out for playing badly is against ToS; it's harassment. And overall, I understand this sentiment.

This is why I've always tried to be as encouraging as possible. If we wipe, be like "Hey, it's okay, that caught us off guard, but we know for next time, we can do this!" I want players to grow and improve, not shrink inwards and suffer for negative experiences.

Here's the problem: As a healer, sometimes there's those players that just... can't be kept up with, you know? The players who stand in EVERYTHING, expecting to just be babysat through every mechanic?

What's the best way of dealing with those players as a mentor?

I had such an experience tonight. I forgot to turn off my mentor crown before going into Alliance Raids (As much as I WANT to offer advice, it's pointless since someone always pulls immediately and there's no time to type!) I had to start leaving two players (My alliance's tank, and a monk) dead whenever we could get away with it. The tank in particular was being a total smartass, sassing every comment everyone made. I had to apologize to the party for being less free with the revives due to limited resources, and the tank sassed me by saying "Resources are things like woods or metals, mana is a pool, you have enough." It was becoming very clear this guy had no intention of changing their ways. So I just grit my teeth and resolved to do my best to keep everyone else alive as best I could - and the tank if I had resources to spare.

We had some first timers I regrettably couldn't explain mechanics to, and they thought it was their fault, so I had to try to encourage them, like "No, no, it's okay, most of you are fine, especially you, other healer, promise!" When we finally won after several very sloppy wipes, I praised the people who were clearly being down on themselves, including two first timers and someone who hadn't done it in a long time. The tank jumped on this. "Saying the rest of us sucked, huh? How did you become a mentor when you're that toxic?" Flabbergasted at his aggression, I told him off for it, explaining that they stood in EVERYTHING and NO healer has enough resources to babysit that. I ended on "No offense, but I'm not the problem" and just left, when I had originally intended to stick around and offer more detailed advice to the others so they'd be better prepared for next time. And it feels bad. (And yes, I'm basically openly admitting to breaking ToS, because I admit my mistakes and learn from them. Case in point: coming here to ask for advice!)


How do the rest of you handle players like that? Is there some kind of community guideline, or is it on a case-by-case basis? In the event of a case-by-case basis, in this kind of scenario, what would YOU have personally done? How does one encourage the players who need encouragement without drawing the ire of people like this tank, and IF the tank gets on your case, how do you deal with it?