I figured out why I stopped being a Healer. It was the harassment.

[NYCLouisGamer]

I used Duty Finder for a Level 50 Dungeon PUG as a Scholar. I had a tank that started getting pissed at me because I "wasn't healing". Nobody was dying and in fact, nobody's health dipped below 40% at any time. He started complaining that he wasn't being healed.

Not being healed?! EOS was busy overhealing like crazy. Essentially, he wanted to be topped off at all times. I did casually notice (but didn't say it out loud) that once my DPS started being higher than his, the complaints magically appeared. But this is not the first time that a tank suddenly got pissy if their DPS was poor. And I have also seen other party members become toxic & bitchy if they didn't have full HP bars, even though they were in no danger of death.

In the last dungeon I did as a Healer, I started doing completely unnecessary AOE group heals & shields as PR. Then I knew I was done. If I have to overheal & play poorly to stop players from harassing me, that is the opposite of fun.

Toxicity is different from advice. I welcome helpful tips during an instance! "You should stand to the left side of the boss" or "It helps if you pop that steroid at the beginning of the pull so we can do more DPS" is genuinely helpful. I appreciate that.

On the other hand, "You need to heal!" and "Healer, do your job!" is not helpful. It creates a negative atmosphere & encourages total silence in an instance, even when communication would help.

So I switched to DPS and what a difference! I am having a lot of fun! Nobody compliments me (other than 1 group where a girl said that I was hot) but nobody bothers me either. I am never the target of toxicity. In return, I am constantly super-nice to the tank and healer because I remember what it was like to be in their position.


Disclaimer: None of this applies if you have a static. In that case, you are probably enjoying healing & tanking and that is a good thing!

[Sqwall]

Dungeons are a mixed bag of garbage players and nasty attitudes. Sometimes you get a pro group, and sometimes you get the paste eaters. It's a dice roll.

I suggest trying to heal again and just ignore the comments, but re-evaluate your healing if those people are getting all up in arms. 9 times out of 10 it's because that tank is garbage (not mitigating, standing in orange, thinking they can pull more then they should, undergeared, bad rotation, won't use skills given) and the blame falls ALWAYS on the healer. I have all my tanks to 80, and I can spot a tank just rick rolling their keyboard because they don't know how to tank in dungeons yet. Maybe they are new etc, etc.

I have healed some real stinkers that pull the entire dungeon and with my synced level 80 515 AST...NO amount of lightspeed and Benefic II's will keep their moronic character alive. They are just bad at tanking and think it's my fault.

DPS are on their own imo. If they die it's usually because they want to squeeze out that last GCD before getting out of the fire. If a DPS takes direct damage for the sake of their personnel damage it's on them. If it's raidwide AOE they get a pass as I know it's coming and I can shield or heal that. I can't shield or heal a dps being greedy.

Healing can be brutal, and it's made even worse when others don't realize they are making your job harder. That's why I say some can be cry babies "Why did you let me die? Why no heals?" to that I just reply "Why did you not get out that AOE? Why should I waste my MP on you because your greedy? Why did you get one shot when you knew where to stand? Is this your first time? Do you need advice? How can I help you from taking damage you don't need to take?"

I find healing extreme/savage much easier...as EVERYTHING is scripted and I know when the hits are coming. However I can't predict foolish behavior from greedy dps or tanks that don't use mitigation. Sometimes healing feels like baby sitting... the first scene of "Who Framed Rodger Rabbit" comes to mind when parties start to go off the rails as I try to keep everything together healing....seriously look it up....it's a perfect analogy.

[ItMe]

I'm sorry your time with healing has been so thankless.
I have a static so I didn't realize it was like this in PUGs.
To combat this attitude I'll try and be kinder to my rando healers.
Thanks for bringing this up, and I hope it hasn't hurt your enjoyment.

[NYCLouisGamer]

Thank you for being so kind. Honestly, the majority of the people on this message board are pretty nice. If you were the group that I played with, this game would be heaven!

That said, I am still really enjoying FFXIV now much more than before. I did not choose DPS to go on vacation. As DPS, I am concerned about my skill level than before but in a good way. I analyze my rotation, look up different openers, eat in-game food, pop Int potions beforehand to increase my DPS & use a DPS meter to make sure I am doing this correctly. In most dungeons, I am the top of the DPS chart as BLM but these are only lowbie dungeons! I hit 50% of total DPS yesterday and it really felt like I had accomplished something. I keep trying to squeeze a bit more out of my DPS.

But how do people make it to the next level of DPS superstar? It feels like some of the online guides are written in a different language! lol

[IceBlueNinja]

Thank you for being so kind. Honestly, the majority of the people on this message board are pretty nice. If you were the group that I played with, this game would be heaven!

That said, I am still really enjoying FFXIV now much more than before. I did not choose DPS to go on vacation. As DPS, I am concerned about my skill level than before but in a good way. I analyze my rotation, look up different openers, eat in-game food, pop Int potions beforehand to increase my DPS & use a DPS meter to make sure I am doing this correctly. In most dungeons, I am the top of the DPS chart as BLM but these are only lowbie dungeons! I hit 50% of total DPS yesterday and it really felt like I had accomplished something. I keep trying to squeeze a bit more out of my DPS.

But how do people make it to the next level of DPS superstar? It feels like some of the online guides are written in a different language! lol

tanks/dps who do this are LOL to me ofc I hate to throw them out there but sams=love eating oranges or blms just love to be on the opposite side of the map, now if a blm dears wonder asking me how they not being heal yet the heals/regens/shields is hitting everyone else hmm I wonder why, or yes you know sometimes tanks who never know the word migitate and I can light speed+benefic 2 till thy kingdom come and it may not be enough cause they eating all the oranges and not pressing not a single cool down, paladins at least may just clem themselves when they feel I cant keep up but still yeah ignore those types, Had a rdm in puppets telling me to use shields when everyone but him was close by to get em and he dying to every avoidable mech there is, one time he died he tells my whm co healer there is something cure 2. So am like umm and there is something call transcent that you get from death that you could have use that to block that mech by the timing I saw and not tip over again then maybe me or whmwas able to hit you with a heal after , like its not like your the only one thats probably damaged and well you didnt wanna follow me to avoid mechs when I marked myself. Ignore those people friend and do what makes you happy.

[Sqwall]

But how do people make it to the next level of DPS superstar? It feels like some of the online guides are written in a different language! lol

Oh boy.... this is a can of worms ain't it?

I'm no BLM expert by any means. RDM is my caster of choice as it's the least complex. BLM is about as bad as SMN in uptime.

The word you should roll your eyes at the most is "optimal".

I hate that word and you will hear it A LOT in extreme...even more in savage and down right required in ultimate. If you're not playing optimally you are wasting everyone's time by skirting with enrage timer. Unless you're being carried or your in a extreme/savage with a team full of thic boi's/grl's your going to have a tough time.

So...practice....practice...practice.... Use those target dummies to your advantage. I spend a lot of time testing at max level on the FC dummies. Repetition builds that muscle memory you need as a DPS.

You know your PRO...when you don't look at your hotkeys, and you know the high end fights are structured so well that you know when your next CD is supposed to be up just by the mechanics. Diamond Extreme I know when my next inner release should be up by the fight phases.

Don't worry about the online guides for now. Learn to play your job and the rotation. Once you understand the combos, potency buffs, positionals, burst phase, cooldowns of a job really well. THEN look at an optimal guide....and practice over a weekend.

The hard part is playing optimally under pressure, and understanding the mechanics of a fight always comes first....your optimal rotation doesn't mean anything if your dead or being forced to escape an AOE/Cleave.

Just be glad you're not a a SMN. I have a really hard time playing SMN in high end as I'm constantly losing my place in my rotation.

[Sqwall]

tanks/dps who do this are LOL to me ofc I hate to throw them out there but sams=love eating oranges or blms just love to be on the opposite side of the map, now if a blm dears wonder asking me how they not being heal yet the heals/regens/shields is hitting everyone else hmm I wonder why, or yes you know sometimes tanks who never know the word migitate and I can light speed+benefic 2 till thy kingdom come and it may not be enough cause they eating all the oranges and not pressing not a single cool down, paladins at least may just clem themselves when they feel I cant keep up but still yeah ignore those types, Had a rdm in puppets telling me to use shields when everyone but him was close by to get em and he dying to every avoidable mech there is, one time he died he tells my whm co healer there is something cure 2. So am like umm and there is something call transcent that you get from death that you could have use that to block that mech by the timing I saw and not tip over again then maybe me or whmwas able to hit you with a heal after , like its not like your the only one thats probably damaged and well you didnt wanna follow me to avoid mechs when I marked myself. Ignore those people friend and do what makes you happy.

Man you hit the nail on the head, and it's everything I hate about being a healer. It truly is the most thankless job, and I main tank.

[NYCLouisGamer]

Thank you. So I shouldn't be playing a bunch of DPS jobs at once. I noticed that at Level 50, BLM feels complete while SMN feels incomplete and the DPS is a bit low.

I will concentrate on BLM for now. Keep practicing, rather than hoping that a guide will magically improve my skill level: "Summoners & Samurai hate him! Use this one weird trick."

[Rilifane]

Thank you. So I shouldn't be playing a bunch of DPS jobs at once. I noticed that at Level 50, BLM feels complete while SMN feels incomplete and the DPS is a bit low.

I will concentrate on BLM for now. Keep practicing, rather than hoping that a guide will magically improve my skill level: "Summoners & Samurai hate him! Use this one weird trick."

Don't look at endgame guids, look at simple rotation guides for various level ranges. Escpecially BLM has very different ST/ aoe rotations that signifcantly change every couple of levels.
Escpecially balance guides are mostly for players that either already have a very good understanding of the game, rotations, uptime, weaving/ clipping etc., want to level a new class and play it with endgame gameplay in mind even while leveing or players that have been 80 for some time, did plenty of content on a class and want to tackle endgame content.
Simple rotation guides will prevent common mistakes born of misconceptions (or someone being really bad at math), they provide a good basis to work with but they're not in-depths nor do they try to be optimal at all times. Those are the ones for you.
The in-depths class guides are too detailed for now because they're trying to provide information on how to play optimally at all times, even tackling niche cases you will never ever see in DF.

[Keramory]

For some reason low to mid level dungeons has a bit of a problem with wannabe elites who usually end up quitting the game pretty quick. It's also almost always coming from some weirdo of a tank. Occasionally a healer too, but mostly the tanks. DPS are usually too busy hoping no one notices their mindless AOE spam all run to say anything XD

I'd suggest sticking through healer to 80. You'll quickly notice the change in tune to your average dungeon run once you hit 80.

If you run into it again, be firm or ignore them. I have no problem telling a tank I don't want to hear their nonsense unless they die. My job is to ensure the party lives and the vast majority of my time in a dungeon is to DPS when not curing. Can't say I ever get kicked as a reply to that. Just dont sit there not dps'ing if you're going to do that, because you'll come off as lazy and they might kick you.

Edit- Before this becomes a debate, I'm actually not a huge advocate for healers DPSing if their uncomfortable doing it. It's just something I prefer to do myself.