RNG behind RNG with a side of waiting

[ItMe]

Wait, a thread with this title isn't about fishing?

As I type, I’m one of thirteen sitting in Bozja waiting for a handful of skirmishes to pop

That's part of your problem. To disincentivise players from camping the aetheryte and just watching the map they've made it so in Bozja you'll have a better time if you're out there doing things and spawning skirmishes.
Map watchers have worse odds at getting into engagements, and "rumor has it" that active players get better drops too.