Finally, maybe, got my internet sorted today. So get this, the new line they installed in the ground wasn't connected correctly. The line going into the house was bad, and there were issues at their hub. Somehow three different techs over the course of 5 months not only messed up in the installation, but failed to notice or, rather, didn't bother to fix the actual issues. Instead, all this time blaming it on something on my end.