Suggestion: Mutual Unfriending or invisible status

[Tonburberry]

I'll give it a go, hope this is the right forum; it would be nice that, when unfriending someone, you are also removed from their friend list when you remove them from yours. Based on currently being in an awkward situation of having someone making a beeline for me whenever I log in and they notice, because they always know where I am. Sometimes the mutual random friending doesn't work and I just want to drop it and go on my way, instead of being stuck trying to explain boundaries to a borderline creep.

Alternately, being able to hide your online status, which could go halfway between unfriending them but still being on their friend list.

Props to the GM who politely answered my in game report though, even though they couldn't remove me from the problem player's list

[ADVSS]

Huh? This sounds really fishy. So now we're just forcing people to decide who they want/will be friends with? This is a bizarre request, and im glad the GM politely told you, you cant control another players friends list, ban list, or FC orientation.

[Naoki34]

Huh? This sounds really fishy. So now we're just forcing people to decide who they want/will be friends with? This is a bizarre request, and im glad the GM politely told you, you cant control another players friends list, ban list, or FC orientation.

You've never been stalked by an old friend of yours.

A person you thought was nice, but for one stupid thing, it goes wrong and the person turns out to be one of those sick people who want to ruin the in-game life and just smart enough not to get banned.

Well, he can know 24/7 where you are and come and spoil your fun.

What's the GM going to tell you?
"Things are not going well with this person and blacklisted and life is good."

But it's not that simple. You can remove it from your friend list and the blacklist in the meantime, that person can continue to piss you off in the game, with impunity.

Ignorance is beautiful...
The internet is full of psychos, you just can't possibly just quote a charter to defend it.

[ADVSS]

You've never been stalked by an old friend of yours.

A person you thought was nice, but for one stupid thing, it goes wrong and the person turns out to be one of those sick people who want to ruin the in-game life and just smart enough not to get banned.

Well, he can know 24/7 where you are and come and spoil your fun.

What's the GM going to tell you?
"Things are not going well with this person and blacklisted and life is good."

But it's not that simple. You can remove it from your friend list and the blacklist in the meantime, that person can continue to piss you off in the game, with impunity.

Ignorance is beautiful...
The internet is full of psychos, you just can't possibly just quote a charter to defend it.

Nope and ill never have that issue, because i dont lead people on or humor them, or make my intentions unknown, you have to agree/accept a friend request. Just because you erred is not anyone else's fault but your own. Blacklist is all you got. You cant just enter the cactpot and get your entry returned because it wasnt the winning ticket. Be a little more self conscious with your friends list. You dont make any person you see your friend irl, why would the "internet is full of psychos" be any different.

[Tonburberry]

Nope and ill never have that issue, because i dont lead people on or humor them, or make my intentions unknown, you have to agree/accept a friend request. Just because you erred is not anyone else's fault but your own. Blacklist is all you got. You cant just enter the cactpot and get your entry returned because it wasnt the winning ticket. Be a little more self conscious with your friends list. You dont make any person you see your friend irl, why would the "internet is full of psychos" be any different.

Erm, I suppose I see where you're coming from, but my dude, it's a game. Sometimes you have an awesome run in a dungeon with a random person and you exchange friend requests because hey, would be fun to do it again! And that's part of the fun of mmos. But friendships don't work out in real life irl either, and it's not leading anyone on when you have one idea and the other person promptly reveals they have totally different idea. Sometimes you give an inch and they'll take a mile. And I don't owe anyone a big adult conversation on why you shouldn't follow them around and expect someone to want to hang out all the time.

(This current problem I'm having also included this person dropping some intense personal happenings and generally not having great irl-game boundaries. I shouldn't have to shoulder that.)

Honestly my biggest misgiving is them knowing exactly where I am all the time, and, I would gladly blacklist and go my way if I didn't already know they'd be able to follow me around regardless. So what about the compromise? Being able to hide location status maybe? Then no one's feathers are too ruffled.

[ADVSS]

Erm, I suppose I see where you're coming from, but my dude, it's a game. Sometimes you have an awesome run in a dungeon with a random person and you exchange friend requests because hey, would be fun to do it again! And that's part of the fun of mmos. But friendships don't work out in real life irl either, and it's not leading anyone on when you have one idea and the other person promptly reveals they have totally different idea. Sometimes you give an inch and they'll take a mile. And I don't owe anyone a big adult conversation on why you shouldn't follow them around and expect someone to want to hang out all the time.

(This current problem I'm having also included this person dropping some intense personal happenings and generally not having great irl-game boundaries. I shouldn't have to shoulder that.)

Honestly my biggest misgiving is them knowing exactly where I am all the time, and, I would gladly blacklist and go my way if I didn't already know they'd be able to follow me around regardless. So what about the compromise? Being able to hide location status maybe? Then no one's feathers are too ruffled.

To be fair, you are right. Last login time, etc probably should be toned down from the list in general. I agree that an invisible mode is totally acceptable, but deleting yourself from a (ex)friends list is just going nowhere good south tbf. Invisible Mode I'll agree with.

[MOZZYSTAR]

There is absolutely NO reason unfriending someone shouldn't be mutual. If you remove a friend from your discord, skype, Hell even AIM back when it was a thing, it's mutual. FFXIV is literally the only thing I know of where unfriending isn't mutual. And quite frankly, it's kind of creepy. Being offline, there's no point because people can see you right on the game. But unfriending? Should be mutual 100%.


Unfortunately, I requested unfriending to be mutual ages ago and it got a number of likes (like 40-70+ or something like that) and it was never addressed. The best thing you can do until (or rather if) Square Enix fixes this issue is block them before you unfriend them. I'm not sure if they can see you online if you've blocked them, or if you still show up on their friend list, but they'll at least won't be able to contact you.


If an unwanted friend keeps harassing you, though, block them definitely and then send in a harassment ticket. A GM will investigate the situation for you. I had an FC actively harass me to join. I asked them to stop. When they wouldn't, I blocked the leader (who was the one who kept inviting me), and they bypassed that by having another member invite me a number of times. I blocked that person and reported promptly. A GM said they'd investigate it for me. I didn't get any word back from the GM after that, but I was never bothered by that FC again.

[SannaR]

If I remember correctly this was brought up during a LL Q&A and the response was a no at the time due to not wanting to hurt the other person's feelings. I think it was one of those things that is a cultural difference. I'd still want this to be a thing as I do have someone who I had on my friends list that I took off my friends list due to them switching names so often I wasn't able to keep track of. Who would also bug me to ask about a mutual friend who not only changed names but also servers due to harassment.

[Raikai]

OP, maybe just blacklisting the person isn't an option?