Lets talk about the FFXIV player base..

[Krotoan]

I'm sorry but this is an awful way to teach someone they are bad, if someone keeps getting kicked from parties then they're just going to quit, especially if no one offers any explanation and silent kicks them. It might not be your responsibility or right (why are you even saying it like that lol)

Because some see it as their "Right" as a "better" player to correct people not doing it their way. Content passed or not.
I agree if nothing is EVER said some will quit. But the problem being here that people jump down peoples throats pretty quickly for minor issues.

but it seems cruel to let a bad player flail about instead of helping them and SE has shown that outside of Hall of the Novice and SSS, they’re not really interested in helping players learn how to play their jobs.

I disagree. If you play the game and do the required content as it comes you are fed mechanics one by one with survivable, teachable examples.

If they choose to ignore the advice, that's a different conversation. Also, 'jumping on a sub-par player' that's a weird way to put it, the only people who do that are just as bad as the person they're lecturing and no one likes them either. Sub-par play is NOT ok unless the person is new to the game or the content itself.

Why is "sub-par" play your problem beyond that one run? Most of the time I see complaints about it is people not even doing the egregious "one" pull or the "no dps" healer. They're just not doing it optimally and someone starts with something like "do you even know what an AOE is?". As someone who wears the mentor mark with full intentions of explaining every mechanic if necessary, I see this offered so much more than a gentle suggestion or observation.

This is simply not true, the idea that people who are trying to offer advice in this game to other players have lofty standards that go beyond what is required is false and pushing it as the truth is facetious. I have never, ever seen someone ask a bad player or a new player to perform at Extreme/Savage/Ultimate levels. Asking someone to perform a rotation, actually press their buttons and contribute to whatever piece of content they willingly signed up for is nothing more than asking for basic decency. If this person doesn't want to actually play, they should not have signed up for content, it's as simple as that.

I wouldn't have said anything if I hadn't observed it multiple times in game and seen it quoted on these forums. "Basic decency".. unless that person has some sort of limitation you know nothing about. Everyone seems to have this standard of bare-minimum based on their own gameplay and ability with zero empathy for the likely thousands of others out there who simply cannot function on that level. Your bare-minimums are someone elses "hyper focus".

Sure, they can initiate a vote kick, but let me tell you what will happen. The PF leader will most likely take the party out of the content and remove the person pointing out an issue because they're rather protect their friends feelings than actually take the rightful criticism onboard, that or they'll just blow the PF up because people in this game cannot deal with problems being pointed out.

Also that goes both ways, those who do not do damage as healers and do not do big pulls when the party wants it, should make their own parties so as not to be detrimental to others.

Then do you really want to be part of that run? If you want optimal runs per minute or whatever, make your own parties. Those who use the DF should understand it's what you get and not "what you want". Clear that run, move on with your life. I wouldn't expect you to say nothing because sure I can get you might want to help, but again, try to be non-accusatory.

Sure, I got my farm done (no mount, very sad) but that's another bad experience for me to chalk up. It didn't really change my life, but every time something similar happens, it's just going to quietly build up in the back of my mind and eventually sour my attitude. You shouldn't so flippantly write off bad experiences, acting as if it didn't matter, because unfortunately it is a problem with this playerbase. If these bad experiences were few and far between, then sure I wouldn't really care and would just accept it as luck of the draw etc, however, we have an entire thread dedicated to the sheer ineptitude of this playerbase and it's probably the biggest thread on this board. I'm not stupid enough to expect that every single time I do content with people via DF and PF, that I'm going to get players of the same skill level with the same investment, however it shouldn't be filled with players who are half paying attention, don't know how to play their jobs, won't listen to advice and bring the party down.

Again, it is a game and if you're gonna let this kind of thing get to you then it's entirely within your power to make and run "optimal" parties. Otherwise you get what you get and antagonizing others is not going to help. I'm not "writing off" bad experiences.. I choose to not focus on them because they don't matter and ultimately either way I'm wasting my time playing a video game.

To finish up and to address your final point, why should I have to leave because of a bad player? That is a fantastic way to drive away all the good players from interacting with others in the playerbase because they'll just get flamed and told "if you don't like my bad play, leave". The playerbase needs to realise it's on them to assist others to get better at the game and to remove those who do not want to from play until they wake up and understand that no one wants to play with them unless they actually try and that's really all anyone is asking for, for others to try and not just run around the arena of a boss, pressing their gcds when they feel like it and dying to mechanics and then typing in chat "haha oops xD".

Because the only experience you truly have control over is your own. Leaving is the easiest and least antagonistic way of dealing with it. Heck I'd even consider "we need to fix something or you can just kick me" to be well within reason. The playerbase is made of a wide array of people , all of differing abilities and constitutions and not considering this before starting with "our tank is... " or "The dps isn't.. "is a deeper problem than people not being "up to snuff".

I get where Krotoan is coming from, but it seems odd to expect people to be content with just clearing a dungeon, that's kind of the minimum. The game isn't difficult, hate to break it to anyone. I also don't think the silent kicks or silence when a group wipe happens has the person who might've caused it reflect on what they could have done better. I do genuinely believe some people stumble through content.

Content? No. Tolerated, yes. I don't feel the game is difficult by any stretch but I do know people, personally, who find certain aspects stressful. Aspects that are not strictly necessary.

I could spend an hour in a dungeon, but it could also take 15 minutes. I derive no greater fun nor pleasure being in the dungeon longer. It's why some peeps get peeved at single pulling tanks. You CAN pull two groups, so it costs nothing to do so. As far as I can tell, people run roulettes to get their tomestones for gear, not for the joy of running Thousand Maws again.

Yes to get things done. However the expectation that every random you find will not only get it done but get it done within your personal parameters is setting yourself up for aggravation and disappointment. There is a wildly varying playerbase out there, I encourage people to realize this rather than expect everyone they come across to meet their standards.

I want to restate the validity of both ends again. If you're someone who wants to have a pizza in one hand and your hand on WASD with the other, I think that's fine. With the elaborate and relevant crafting system in FFXIV, Housing, Social, and Combat aspects of FFXIV it's normal to have an array of people from all mindsets to play the game.

But if we're going to be tolerant and accepting that some people aren't going to understand their rotations, use CDs, and frankly sometimes slow things down; I feel it's only fair you don't crucify someone who mentions they want you to double pull or potentially offers well meaning advice. Toxicity goes both ways, forcing someone to pull wall to wall if they're not sure they can is toxic, forcing the entire party to play your way is too.

Not just "mindsets" but ability. It's not a choice for some. Youtube pizza guy may just NOT be able to focus on the game as you or I can. I don't believe ANYONE should force someone else to play as they wish, but I know the only thing we have complete control over is our own experience, therefor in the case that someone isn't performing up to your standards the easiest and least antagonistic way of dealing with it is to remove yourself from the situation. This is my suggestion, not a command. Otherwise all you'll end up doing is making yourself and the other person madder. You MAY help some of those people out there who actually don't know whats going on or how to deal with something, totally possible, but the second someone balks at your suggestion it's in your hands to let it go and chalk this run up to their own problem.