I think you need to fine the right server on Crystal. Diabolos here and from my experience Diabolos is relaxed. There is RP but from what I have seen it's minimal. If you want RP you go to one of the other servers like Balmung. Ul'dah on Diabolos verse Ul'dah on Balmung is greatly different. On Diabolos it is pretty calm with mostly ppl just chilling or going about their business while in Balmung it is crowded especially the Adventures Guild which is full of ppl RPing. Granted it has been months since I've visited so maybe it has died down or gotten worse.