Toxic healers

[Buumee]

Here's the issue: A tank who single pulls is doing 2 things: 1) they make a 15-20 minute dungeon take 30-40 minutes. 2) They are demonstrating that they have been carried through content up until that point. They're getting kicked for such selfishness. As someone who has to join a dungeon as a non-tank to level the job, and as someone who makes Savage alts for non-Tank classes, I don't have the luxury of going in as a tank and doing it properly.

That in itself is a toxic and elitist mentality. Unless they're intentionally slowing down a dungeon while knowing full well they can handle bigger pulls, I have to disagree with you.
By using Duty Finder you know full well and are accepting the risk of being in a party with people whom you may deemed lesser skilled than you and I would be more than happy to deny such an absurd request to kick the Tank.
I'd go far as to rebuttal that you yourself have the full right to queue premade so you don't have to subject yourself to anyone who is unlucky enough to be performing less than your expectations.

[Nestama]

Will you do this on a tank new to the dungeon? I personally like learning where things spawn my first time in, but I also do every new thing as a healer first.

If it's at level 71, I don't see why not. Unless they level skipped, the tank in a level 71 dungeon isn't new to tanking and most likely has experience in tanking 50,60 and 70 dungeons.

[Buumee]

It's ok. I'll be sure to have you kicked for wasting everyone's time if you single pull a late game dungeon. You refusing to get better on tank is directly harming my experience and is against my playstyle, so I have every right.

You'll get it eventually. <3

I don't necessarily disagree with the entirety of what you said. It is everyone's prerogative to learn their job, unfortunately not everyone learns at the same pace or as skilled as the next player.
As much as I like to vroom vroom through all the dungeons, I do believe that because it's team content, everyone deserves a say on the pace of which we're going.
If my tank isn't comfortable with room to room pulling, if my healer isn't comfortable healing my butt, or if the DPS is too low where it's affecting both the Tank and Healer - I'd rather clear it at a slower consistent pace than wasting more time on wipes and running back.
Lastly if it's someone's first time and they would like to experience it rather than it being another 11 minute dungeon, I'm going to respect that.

[Jojoya]

What is up with the phenomenon of healers being ego maniacs?

I tanked a lvl 71 dung last night where the healer was a male roe with no clothes on and a suggestive name who kept pulling ahead of me. The third pull I died followed by the dps and he finished the last 2 mobs remaining solo and then proceeded to say he was very skilled and pulled the boss while me and the 2 other dps were still running back.

The second boss, I had to afk (I think i was afk for 2 minutes) because I heard a loud bang downstairs, and when I got back they (I’m assuming the healer) had pulled the boss and kept everyone alive, and once the boss died he said “having a tank is useless LMFAO” and sprinted & pulled every single pack until the last boss where he miraculously waited.

At the end of the dungeon he did a squat & push-up emote and told me I need to learn how to pull faster with an air kiss emote

I just had to share that experience because it was probably the most toxic person I’ve ever encountered in this game.

How does one bad experience make all healer toxic ego maniacs?

Especially when there are examples of tanks and DPS behaving the same way/

[LittleImp]

I've been pugging raids since HW, and I'd probably agree that healers stand out as the role that generally has the most... problematic players. I think I've removed more healers from my parties than any other role by far, and in most cases they've had bad attitudes. Lots of "I control who lives or dies, now the whole party must cater to me while I underperform!" types.

I think the nature of the role tends to attract people who want to feel needed or important; It also certainly doesn't help that the FFXIV community creates a lot of content involving really exaggerated healer worship.

[Violet_Galaxy]

What is up with the phenomenon of healers being ego maniacs?

I tanked a lvl 71 dung last night where the healer was a male roe with no clothes on and a suggestive name who kept pulling ahead of me. The third pull I died followed by the dps and he finished the last 2 mobs remaining solo and then proceeded to say he was very skilled and pulled the boss while me and the 2 other dps were still running back.

The second boss, I had to afk (I think i was afk for 2 minutes) because I heard a loud bang downstairs, and when I got back they (I’m assuming the healer) had pulled the boss and kept everyone alive, and once the boss died he said “having a tank is useless LMFAO” and sprinted & pulled every single pack until the last boss where he miraculously waited.

At the end of the dungeon he did a squat & push-up emote and told me I need to learn how to pull faster with an air kiss emote

I just had to share that experience because it was probably the most toxic person I’ve ever encountered in this game.

You met a jerk. Congrats. Report and move on.

[Ursa_Vonfiebryd]

Last expac it was entitled tanks to the point that their jobs were gutted and a lot of other jobs homogenized so they could no longer enable this behavior. In Stormblood, tank optimization required the party to mitigate their own enmity and there are pages and pages in the Duty Finder thread of tanks going into God-Mode if you pulled aggro from them or refused to use your mitigation skills to enable that style of play.

Again, a lot of this is just...jerks but since that behavior was nominally supported the magical word of OPTIMIZATION, a lot of people viewed it as acceptable and even defended it; even when people were getting shirked or left for dead in duties if you stepped a toe out of line.

I feel like Green Healing has moved in to fill that spot but a lot of that is backlash over the stripping and/or redistribution of skills that had once made each healing job unique. Now it's meh. By pretty much everyone's admission.

That person might have been skilled but they were garbage socially and likely the reason why they ran from fight to fight was to prevent you from vote-kicking. As other have suggested, either report or blacklist that person and never have to worry about them again.

[Vahlnir]

The role isn't the blame, but the player is. I wouldn't assume that just because one healer said mean things to you that all of them are like that, because they aren't. Far from it, actually. In my experience, healers are ridiculously patient most of the time. Being a tank requires a certain amount of patience, but you have to be on another level to be a good healer.

[Buumee]

I'm sorry that you had such a horrific experience and dealt with someone that should be reported for toxicity, but the whole "I experienced this once" then grouping the healer role as "ego maniacs" is a little much lol.