Embarrassing confessions-

[GrumbleBeard]

When I started in late ARR, someone told me that it was better to skip using True Strike and just do Twin Snakes every time as monk to make sure it never fell off. It wasn't until mid Heavensward that I remembered it existed and started using it.

[Malmstrom]

I'll add another one to the mix. This is a bit of a hard one...

I have never cleared an Extreme or higher fight while it was current content. I did not do ARR Extremes until SB when I could solo them. I have only done a couple of Extreme HW fights because I was dragged kicking and screaming.

Why, though? It's a bit of an explanation...

I have tons of social anxiety issues. That's why a lot of my threads / posts on these forums end up as rude, thinly veiled b****ing, or straight up complaining for something like more open world content. More open world content means more solo play, so it's more I can do without other people being involved.

I have no friends in this game. I have only ever been in two directionless FCs in the entire time I have played this game (shortly before HW dropped), and those I was in only for maybe a couple months. I ignored the people or grew to despise them for stupid and trivial reasons, usually. I have an exceedingly difficult time making friends both in game and out. I'm the worst kind of introvert because I am acutely aware of it and how much I hate it but I don't know what to do fix it.

I do not use the Party Finder to do anything. I have this constant nagging doubt about my competence in this game. Sometimes I feel like I'm fine, and then I read a guide or something on a fight and it goes in a hundred directions and I feel lost. I read a job guide and they talk about optimal openers, rotations, what to do when at what time at what phase at what second at what cooldown interval at what attosecond (heck you, spell check, attosecond is a unit of time) and I immediately feel like if I tried to do anything with any sort of difficulty I would hinder groups.

I read the recruitment requirements on Party Finder and it's always gibberish to me. "TTDDHDQWTFBBQ NORTH TURN SOUTH BANANASPROCKET", and everyone else joins up knowing exactly what that means. I'm sitting here like "Welp, guess that excludes me!"

I use my job as a bit of an excuse. It's a decent excuse, but still an excuse. I wake up at 2 AM to go to work at a fairly physically demanding job. I go to bed before most people even start their raid nights. I'm not staying up until midnight. I go to bed at 1830-1930 on average. I could move to a server in a different time zone, but I can barely socialize with people now, there is no way I'm packing up and moving so I can do exactly that somewhere else.

Even in dungeon runs, my interaction is mostly limited to me pressing the "Yes" emote button I have hot-keyed so my character will nod in greeting. And then I "Yes" again at the end before I leave. That's it.

It's bad to the point where I recently found out a guy at work plays the game. YEAH! Someone I have things in common with! Same music! Same interests! Same video games! I made a character on his server and leveled GNB / AST / MNK to 80 so I could party up with him and the guys he plays with! I haven't played with him a single time.

And Discord? Pffft. I "don't have a mic" if it ever comes up.

Playing this game is difficult for me, sometimes. I enjoy it immensely, and I know I would enjoy it even more if I actively played with other people, but my own mental walls keep me secluded and lonely.

This is probably the most embarrassing thing for me in this game. Not the silly mistakes I've made, or the dumb things I did when I didn't know any better. This, right here.

Anyone that reads this entire thing that I have come off as snarky / jerkwad / sarcastic / or flat out whiny to, I apologize. I tend to get more so the unhappier I get while playing this game. Which isn't to say I'm unhappy because I'm playing, obviously, but because of everything stated above.

...

I'm totally rambling at this point.

Sorry.

Edit - Definitely rambling, it was too long for one post and I had to edit it to include all of it.

[Vidu]

I'll add another one to the mix. This is a bit of a hard one...

...I'm not sure if this really fits into this thread, but I suppose with some... definition bending it could (not that it matters to much, I guess...)

But after reading since post I wanted to apologise for being (hopefully only a bit?) harsh in some of my replies to some of your threads/posts. I didnt really try to put myself in the shoes of someone who might really enjoy this beautiful game but not so much the interaction with other people in it - specially because I used to be the same (doing dungeons to get through ARR MSQ back then would take me hours to muster the courage to queue up for them and I almost never spoke in FC-chat, being ashamed of my - back then - poor english skills and quite certain that no one would really like to chat with me anyways). Since that changed quite a bit over the years, I've adapted a playstyle thats more suited for MMOs - not minding doing stuff in DF, aswell as jumping into PFs, both with a bit of "aroogant confidence" in the form of the thought "Well, I might not be playing stellar, but theres a pretty good chance I'm still going to do better than half of those people, so lets go for it...".
But along with developing that I've seem to have forgotten how I started out here - and even the ability to consider that other people never developed such an attitude or found enjoyment in playing with others and that thats fine, too. Maybe not ideal in an MMO, but still fine.

So... I wanted to apologise for not seeing and/or understanding that - specially within my replies.

I have to say I was a bit disappointed when I checked - against my better knowledge - to see if I wasnt confusing Zalera and Zodiark and could invite you to play together sometimes. Thought it might sound like a hollow phrase considering the difference in datacenters, but should you ever feel like giving playing on european servers a try... poke me or my FC in Odin, if you feel like it!

...writing this felt awkward enough to count as almost embarrassing, I think?

[Liam_Harper]

I'll add another one to the mix. This is a bit of a hard one...

I have never cleared an Extreme or higher fight while it was current content. I did not do ARR Extremes until SB when I could solo them. I have only done a couple of Extreme HW fights because I was dragged kicking and screaming.

Why, though? It's a bit of an explanation...

I have tons of social anxiety issues.

Nothing embarrassing or to be ashamed of at all. You'd be surprised how many people are in the same boat. I was very fortunate myself to stumble across a guild purely for players with social anxiety 9 years ago in WoW which made all the difference and is a big reason I still play MMO's and have come as far as I have. We're still around and branched out into ff14 a few years back, have beaten every EX and are dipping into Savage next week.
I'd give FC's another go, even just having company can break the loneliness. It's quite possible there are FC's aimed towards those with anxiety on your data-center, or even just a friendly group you find you click with.

Can understand what you mean with openers on guides or Party Finder descriptions. It makes little sense to me first time too. Guides in particular are aimed towards experienced Savage players who are optimizing their gameplay. The majority of players are not glancing at a class guide, seeing a 30 step opener, going "cool, got it" and pulling it off flawlessly on every boss after. Most players rotations are all over the place. It's normal, we aren't machines.
Party Finder ...well, PF is PF. A lot of people turn up and don't know what the description means exactly and just try to wing it and pick it up along the way. A nice FC group is a much better place to start out though. Some practice groups will explain, but Party Finder is often a mess where no one wants to discuss strats or work as a team.

I'd recommend working up the courage to give the guy at work a poke ingame. It's scary, but who knows where it might lead. You have to take that first step to get there.

Hope things work out though, take care.

[DBriggs304]

So I have been trying to use between the line more to get me out of tough spots. I use it with Quetzalcoatl keeping key lines in the back in case I need to grab some of the far to reach orbs ge drops.

Well, I thought I would use it the same in Amararout. Right after Therion casts Apokalypsis when you run off to the side, I dropped the ley line in the mid area so I can use it in the proximity mechanic to quicken running to the back.

Well...it didnt go so well. I pulled myself to my death as the fancy mage couldn't traverse the gaping opening between where I was off to the side and the location of my key line.

I hoped no one had noticed...
I was wrong.
Laughter was had by all.

[Kobalos]

Ran a lvling roulette as a WAR and my boyfriend as WHM and went and mass pulled everything in the first room only to realise I had forgotten to pop tank stance and caused my boyfriend to die twice >.<

[Anienai]

Ran a lvling roulette as a WAR and my boyfriend as WHM and went and mass pulled everything in the first room only to realise I had forgotten to pop tank stance and caused my boyfriend to die twice >.<

Curious Gorge forgives you.


Spent a decent amount of time crafting the wrong gear for the levequest.

[Leyza]

I've played since 2011 and still have yet to feel sure in when to pop buffs on DRG and BLM. Both of which I've played since 1.0.

[Meillquei]

I get kind of jealous when I see a character with all jobs at max level because it's something I feel I will never achieve.

There's some jobs and roles that just don't click with me even after reading guides, which for me is mainly healers and black mage.

So I do not use these jobs in group content and level them via FATEs because I'm scared of failing and holding my group back.

[Esmoire]

I get kind of jealous when I see a character with all jobs at max level because it's something I feel I will never achieve.

There's some jobs and roles that just don't click with me even after reading guides, which for me is mainly healers and black mage.

So I do not use these jobs in group content and level them via FATEs because I'm scared of failing and holding my group back.

Just do what I do and level them in PvP! After you join Frontline, you can change to a different job than the one you queued as, and still get XP for it. MSQ roulette as well I feel is almost like not playing the job at all since nothing there seems to be too interested in fighting the player.

I likewise couldn't get into BLM, and I'm glad I didn't actually have to play it to get it to 80. Also got GNB to 80 through PvP though I ended up playing it after-the-fact.