I’m not sure how long I was down there. It must have been a long time though; it’s all that occupies my thoughts. My bags were stuffed beyond capacity - lined with exotic silks, spices, and materia that would fetch a small fortune on any market. But there are more profitable tasks than counting what you already have.

“So we’ve got two doors ahead of us.” The small popoto-shaped paladin barked. “They’re both locked, and we only have one key. So which will it be?”

“Either door is fine.” I answered, indifferent. We’d had this conversation many times.

“Why are you even asking?” Snapped the miqo’te to the right, resting with a slouch on her own sack of riches. “We know you’re just going to choose the left door no matter what we say.”

“And why wouldn’t you choose the left door? The left door was blessed by Hydaelyn herself, I’ll have you know.”

“We’ve been doing this for weeks.” The cat continued. “You have only ever picked the left door, and we’ve never found final chamber.”

“The final chamber is right here, behind this door! All of our faith and dedication to the left door is about to reward us with more treasure than your catbrain can even fathom. In the final chamber the paths are paved with gold, the walls are covered in gold… even the gold is plated with gold down there, I heard!” She waved her arms in dramatic fashion, eyes aglow as all lalafell are when profit sits on the horizon.

“But it’s not going to take us there. It’s going to trigger the alarms and we’ll be thrown out yet again with nothing to show for it. I think we should choose the right door this time.”

“I am choosing the right door. It's the one on the left one.”

“No, you- I mean positionally to the right.”

“We’ll put it to a vote. Slackers in the back! Do you want to pick the left door or do you want to live a life of regret?”

“Maybe it’s worth going right?” I stood up and grabbed my bag, inadvertently knocking over the au’ra nested amidst the valuables. “If we’ve never gotten to the bottom floor from the left door we could try mixing it up.”

“But we spent all this time on the left door! What if we swap now to the right door and it just throws us all out?! Wouldn’t that just eat you up inside?”

Before anyone could respond the scene was interrupted by a blaring klaxon and flashing red lights. Everyone’s gaze immediately turned to the right door where the au’ra stood, key in hand, her bleary eyes mesmerized by the cavalcade of doors smashing to a close in front of her face. “Sorry, I kind of zoned out for a second. I think I heard we’re picking the right door this time?”

The barrage of profanity emitted from the lalafell fell on muted ears as the whole room was sucked through yet another otherworldly portal that left us waterlogged on the shores of the Lochs.

“I think I’m done being a treasure hunter for today.” The lalafell whimpered, flopping onto her back.

“Same time next week?” The miqo’te asked.

“Of course.”

(Gaelicap)