What Your Character Is Really Thinking

[Kacho_Nacho]

FFXIV, we all love it. We meet NPCs, go on quests, defeat opponents, and explore the world.

Yet, our dialogue is pre-determined by the game. As the WoL/WoD, we just go along for the ride.

So, I thought it would be amusing to share what your character really was thinking or wanting to say. It can be any quest or cutscene. Have fun with it!

Just be sure to put **spoilers** so you don't accidently reveal something a new player wouldn't know yet about ShB.

I'll start.

[Latarma]

my char Latarma would mostly like first the first half of arr be like "fine whatever i'll help." but as she be came a hero and legend it would be more tot he tune of "so let me get this right so and so what to attack one of the 6 nations?Have they meet me?" mostly La would just go along and help her friends wile smarting off the villains and such escaply ones the knw of her strength

[HumanNinjaToo]

I’m fairly certain my guy would kicked Mnifilia (or wateva her name is) in the lady nuts for being a dingus, and probably just said F it after the umpteenth time of having to face a primal while the rest of the crew unfortunately arrives late :/

[TheMightyMollusk]

NPCs: Here's a super-vital quest necessary to save the world from chaos and destruction.
Iyami: What's it pay?

[Lunavi]

My character is still crying herself to sleep each night over the loss of her loved one, SPOILER WARNING: Ysayle. T_T

[Avidria]

My character probably just gets really exasperated and impatient with anyone who asks her to "prove herself" at this point. Just has a moment of "Do you know who I am?" And then "Ugh, of course not. Let's get this over with, I guess."

[Mistyregions]

Mine would be in the background and observe, say little to nothing and let people do what they want and figure out how to pick up the pieces after everyone tried doing it their way. Observe, gain knowledge, formulate plan, execute.

[SpiritedMare]

Three things I have learned about my character's personality:

1. She has some extreme form of ADHD and gets REALLY bored REALLY fast when a situation is all talking and no action.
2. The more bored she feels, the more likely she is to blurt out whatever random thing she's thinking, no matter how inappropriate
3. She has no interest in actual "relationships", but she has a ton of superficial crushes (she would be much more the "friends with benefits" type than the "girlfriend" type overall)

Ergo, the funniest thing (and the single most overall indicative thing regarding her personality) she has ever said to me happened on about my 12th Praetorium run, during the part where Gaius and Cid are blathering on and on about Cid's father (Cid and Gaius being two of the NPCs she finds most purely *physically* attractive regardless of personality, along with Estinien and Urianger)... right in the middle of their tedious back-and-forth, she just screamed:

"OMG, both of you need to stop talking and take your clothes off!!"

... I still occasionally think about that and chuckle, trying to imagine how those two very serious characters would have reacted to her doing that in such a heavy moment.

[Raltar]

Any time I was speaking with the Crystal Exarch, I wanted to punch him in the face. I was very disappointed I never got the chance.

[HWalsh]

There is a quest, right before the end of the first part of A Real Reborn, before the 100 quest slog...

It basically goes like this...

Quest Giver 1: "Our morale is low, we need to raise it before we can attack the Empire!"

Ameliana: "So you want me to give, like a rousing speech?"

Quest Giver 1: "Go see the cook! A good meal will perk them up!"

Ameliana: "Uh... Look, don't we have people for that? Like I'm the Warrior of Light, I mean what do I know about cooking? Fine sure. Whatever."

Cook: "Hi, you know what would perk the men up? A moose stew!"

Ameliana: "Uh, ok. You get on that then... I'll be..."

Cook: "So go out and kill a moose, clean it, and bring the meat back here!"

Ameliana: "W-what? D-do you know who I am!? I killed (censored)ing Ifrit for crying out loud, and you want me to kill a moose!? By the (censored)ing Twelve!"

*Ameliana goes out and kills a moose.*

Ameliana: "Here's your moose meat. Happy now?"

Cook: "Let me make the stew then."

*Cook makes the stew*

Cook: "Can you hand deliver this stew to the soldiers?"

Ameliana: "Listen here you piece of (censored). I'm the mother-(censored)ing Warrior of God(censored) Light. First you have me go hunting for something that is like, 40 yards away, that I can (censored)ing see from here. Then you want me to be your waitress? You know what? (Censored) you! I should just let the (censored)ing Empire come in and kill the lot of you! Ungrateful sons of (censored)."

*Ameliana grumbles, collects the plates to deliver the soup, but not before she spits into each and every bowl.*