Also on a screw up I by very nature am most likely to have the whole group call me out. My death ratio, in the last few weeks due to mistakes has been less than any of the other dps or healers, so in short I KNOW its not me Fing up mechanics even close to most of the time. but a healers die and no one says a word but the healer who says My B. I die and literally at least 3 people (because they know i can take a beating and criticism well, and I've kinda become the group scapegoat for people to let frustrations out) always call me out "Oh the freaking ninja dies again, Where's my trick?!"

At first it was a funny joke cause I and everyone else knew SE had Fed me over, but now. Im getting real tired of it. to the point where I'm considering splitting the group and just sticking with the fun calmer people.

Yesterday I had a conversation with one of our reasonable members who finally convinced me to switch to monk, and insisted on Buying me a lvl skip to 70 for MNK. I am exceedingly grateful to this individual, and he listened with reason after i finally blew up and let what I was holding back as the other 4 PMed flow out. But its weird cause I now feel slightly indebted to him after trying to argue him out of it, but he insisted. Again I am super greatful, but if and when NIN comes back I will want to return to it, and TBH I dont really have a ton of free time right now to lvl MNK to 80 when I was hoping to finish lvling SMN to cap out my 5 role quests.