How it used to be...

[Theodric]

FFXIV's community has always appeared as being more friendly on the surface compared to certain other MMO's but ultimately the exact same issues as elsewhere are in abundance. I've found that a lot of 'friendly' players are actually very passive aggressive and manipulative beneath their pleasant exterior. It has always been that way.

The best you can do is carve yourself a niche of players to your personal tastes and stick with them. That's what I do.

[Maneesha]

post..

I appreciate that you take your time and read through longer post and also encouraging others to take their take to write longer texts or expressing themselves.

For me its not only the part of writing longer texts and taking more time, its true i dislike receiving a "tl;dr" which then feels like i wasted my time expressing my thoughts/opinion, but also i try not to "ramble" and try to stay on topic, not saying you did any of those (just to be clear). Yes i could have gone into more detail about some stuff, but decided not to in fear of going off-topic and giving the impression of rambling. Some of those would have included the change in perception regarding gaming. It was always seen as something for the younger folks and had, and still has to a certain degree, the stigmata of being for people without work or real life, the nerds and so on. Since gaming is not anymore a niche thing to do, but more mainstream, it brings also more people to it,which can also mean more "bad apples", also a lot of those not having much time due to real life obligations and responsibilities, but still wanting to progress and reach the same "highs" as those who actually have more time and invest much more to pursue their in-game goal or fame.

Of course developers/publishers would actually want to satisfy them, especially if those people are also the ones holding more "buyers" power then a school kid or a student.So games become more "casual", which is good and bad, like everything and depend on the point of view. Remember when everyone knew mmorpgs are a huge time investment and you simply could not play them for an hour or two and expect any real progression, when people were aware they will have to invest hundreds if not thousands of hours to only reach the max level and that this was only a small portion of the game? Yes gone are those days, simply because the targeted audience and the costs to develop and expected profits for a game have gone way up, at least the "AAA" quality stuff, indies are a different topic, but since i rarely play any of those i have no opinion on those.

Another reason why i try to not write long texts is simply because english is a foreign language for me and i am not very confident in my proficiency in it, it takes a long time to write a text with whom i am satisfied and think i expressed my self clearly.


PS:I share a lot of your views regarding social media, the "lack of time" people always express and so on.

[Feidam]

To me all boils down player responsibility. You can control your own actions. Raging and being rude are not exceptions just because it is the internet. Especially when doing an activity with random people as they will not always share the same dedication, wants or skill level. If someone can’t step back and self soothe without pissing all over someone else they need to run with a perfect static 24/7. I hate the it’s the internet deal with it or grow a grow a thicker skin excuse just so someone can behave badly.

Of course, sometimes people get offended over nothing and the above applies to them too.

[AlphaFox]

Think it really depends on the situation. If its a newbie dungeon or someone with a sprout, I am always willing to forgive or let things slide or offer up advice. Its when they are in an 80 dungeon and still don't even know the basic of rotation (BLM I had in Mt Gulg >.>) to the point even a level 60 would go "That ain't right even by our rotation" or doing the obvious mechanics completely wrong. The giant circle with arrows pointing in has not changed meaning just cus you are in a new dungeon. That is when I feel rage building, though I usually will just vent to FC over discord, more so making fun of them as I am usually met with hostility or sarcasm no matter how sweet I try to phrase or offer help, or in the case mentioned I was greeted with silence.
My post obviously meaning to be for things that should be common sense by now, not to be applied for say learning parties or newbies.

[Zazay]

It's the current age of gaming and shift in gaming culture and to a big extend the current state of media cunsumption in general ...






Sincerely,

Thank you. What you have written is something I also experienced, not only tied to gaming behaviour in general. Everyone's lives became so hectic, so haywire, so 'want-on' validating, that I too sometimes wonder, if people are still able to enjoy things without complaining about it or something else.

[DarkMasamune]

I understand what you mean, thought I wouldn't go blaming 'WoW refugees' for that. I remember being asked if I was dropped as a baby just because I mistakenly used a DoT on a Lakshmi Ex add, which killed it, ruining the run. It was a sincere mistake but someone lashed out at me for that. And that was way before the big WoW exode.
Some people may think it's silly to feel upset because "someone insulted you on a video game, get over it", but it's still real human beings insulting you, despite it being 'over a video game'. I remember wanting to cry back then, I felt awful.

Today I learned to take it on the chin and remember I probably never will come across these persons again, but still, sometimes, it hurts and it's stressful.

Now, whenever I want to do something throught PF, like clearing an EX trial, I just open a PF that sounds silly, like "Oh we all suck anyway, let's try to do this!" It might sound weird, but it tends to bring happier people and/or less salty players (in my experience at least). And if you come across someone insulting, welp, just remind yourself that at least, you're not like them and you won't see them again.

Of course, there are people getting offended over the slightess thing, but that's something else lol

[Connor]

Honestly I feel the same, but I think the problem goes a bit further than the game itself. There’s very much a social climate now where you’re thin skinned and weak willed for taking offence or being upset by something, but also can’t do anything without offending someone yourself. You’ll see it on any forum, people talking about how ‘snowflakes’ (just one example) are ruining ‘X’ because they get upset or offended by something, but then get extremely offended at themselves.

I really do wish people would be more empathetic towards others in general. Just because something doesn’t offend one person doesn’t mean everyone is ok with it. And it’s not fair to try and act like a person needs to legitimise their own emotions (which by definition aren’t controllable unless you’re on medication lol).

People are going to feel stressed, angry, happy, sad. No amount of ‘thick skin’ is going to stop us from feeling the way we do about the things that we do. All we truly can do is accept that everyone has the right to feel upset or hurt about something you did, just as they have a right to feel annoyed or stressed about it. And what’s most important is finding a healthy way to resolve these feelings without taking them out on others and causing a vicious cycle

[SturmChurro]

I can't find the post. I don't know if it was in this thread, I read it on my phone. A lot of the times people put up PF groups with specific "requirements" in the details, and a lot of these players complaining about "toxicity" join parties and have literally no clue what they are doing. There is a certain amount of expectations for a player, especially when it comes to party finder. In dungeon content, I expect people to play their role at least semi-efficiently. I don't even ask for them to be an amazing player, just play it well enough that you aren't a complete detriment to your group. These players always say "There's a player behind that screen", but we are players too. We don't always have the time to be wasting carrying somebody who lacks the initiative to learn how to play properly (To an extent), or straight up has no idea what they are doing when they join farm parties or clear parties in PF.

It is completely understandable that players will get frustrated at others like this.

[van_arn]

This is the natural reaction of a playerbase that has too many bad elements expecting a free ride.

Be worth playing with.

[CazzT]

I empathize with you. Someone suggested to me that one reason for the increase in rude people could be because of all the WoW refugees that are coming over to XIV. They told me that WoW's community isn't exactly known for being the nicest.

This a major contributer, though not the only one. Many of the toxic members of this community were here before the WoW Exodus began, but with the influx of more toxic players, they've become emboldened to behave in their toxic ways because there are more of their own kind around.

And polite, decent, friendly part of the community remaining silent and letting them get away with it only allows the plague to spread.