If you didn't enter your house once in 45 days you might aswell be without it and let someone else enjoy the plot.
There are several notifications by mail. When i let my house auto demolish i got like 4-5 mails about it. In-game timer i believe shows you aswell.
There is plenty of information about how you need to ENTER the house to reset it and to check you junk folder for emails.
This was nobody's fault but your own. Might aswell start an uproar about "I got a job and got fired when it turned out I had to actually GO TO WORK to get paid"

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