Is there a place for me?

[Keddera_StormMoon]

Ah yes, all the mundanes remarking how it must be the OP's fault.

The boring will never understand the odd and weird. It's okay, we're used to it.

[Crystal_Raven]

Look at me i'm so weird and quirky! I'm not like other people!

Fixed that for you. That's how you sound.

[Keddera_StormMoon]

*chuckles* Yup, about the reaction I expected.

[Violet_Galaxy]

My goodness. OP you need a /hug. In-game and in real life.

[Barraind]

I'm a misfit. A completely socially retarded freak. I have autism. I don't harmonize with normal people. I end up alone and bitter. I will never be able to behave the way others want

Selling yourself pretty high there...

Those terms are just ways of trying to explain, reject, control, humiliate etc people who don't function well with most others.

To even suggest I should seek psychiatric "care" to "help change my behaviour" is one of the greatest insults imaginable.

Not only are those absolutely ignorant statements, but are only ever parroted by those who KNOW they are the toxic kind of person a great majority of people, other "freaks" included want absolutely nothing to do with, but are unwilling to do anything to change their behavior because god forbid they be forced to have any sort of personal responsibility when "BUT MUH DISEASE!!!" should work. "I'm not an awful person, its muh disease!" "I'm not someone you wouldnt ever chose to spend time with, its muh disease". "I'm not someone you have to explain to every other person whose never met me that they have to either pre-emptively mute me or just never speak at, to or around me, ITS MUH DISEASE!"

I feel like groups that are going for first week/world first clears don't care that much about feelings between each other.

As someone who has raced for world firsts in multiple MMO's over the years, and with people of all personality types and abnormalities, you have to be extremely problematic for anyone to care enough. As I said before, we made it a couple years with several people who could only carry on a normal conversation if they did nothing else, and even that was a struggle. Years.

When raid sizes arent 72 / 40 / 36 you get a LOT more freedom about the kinds of people you dont have to endure because they might be good at video gaming,

[guardin]

I'm a misfit. A completely socially retarded freak. I have autism. I've been kicked from raid groups, bullied and blocked from what I really want to do in this game, which is PvE, simply because I don't harmonize with normal people.

I end up alone and bitter.

I will never be able to behave the way others want but I'm not a low performing player on average and I do have a server 3rd on O4S before my raid group told me I was AIDS and kicked me.

I play FFXIV everyday and want to find other freaks and misfits, people who are genuinely retarded and hated by others but with some level of skill in this game, to do content with. I've grown allergic to normal people. I can't stand them and they can't stand me. I need to be with people who are super excentric.

I'm not looking for normal people to have pity on me. I've given up trying to adapt to what others want. I can't change who I am. I'm looking for people as weird and deviant as me to actually enjoy the game with.

well... dont worry if about "finding people" play alone with trust and just meet people and leave. Dont find a place just wonder meet and move on to the next group. If you keep searching for friends online you're gonna depress yourself. IF you happen to meet some cool peeps THEN become their friends. dont force it