I feel I've had a pretty similar experience with most of my FC's. I've strove to be positive and did my best to 'fit in' and help others out but no matter what I did people always seemed to ignore me. and the larger the fc the worst things usually are. I suffer from depression so I always need to ask my self "is this really happening or is it just the depression talking" but sadly more often than not it's usually the case.

Most FC's have the what I like to call the inner circle. If you're in the click you get loads of privileges and responsibilities. If you're not then you're typically not trusted with anything no matter how competent you are. And you're typically ignored unless the inner circle wants something from you.

Honestly once crystal hits I'm probably going to leave my fc and do some soul searching before ever considering joining another fc. If I ever do join another one it'll have to be a place that understands and accepts the struggle of mental illness. Every other Nerotypical group I join just doesn't understand the struggle.