Change to the ban system.

[Penthea]

To take a break from this game would mean I take a break from life. This game is my only means to happiness and even that is not true happiness but it's better then nothing at all.

So happy that you get reported enough times to almost lose your account? I am not contesting the fact that the game gives you happiness, but it's clear it also gives you a great deal of unhappiness.

I understand the need for escapism but your mental state has almost robbed you of it. Unless you get some help this is going to repeat itself over and over again. You're ruining what little happiness you have by not facing the fact that change needs to come from you, not the game.

You fail to see what I'm really up against. All it's going to take is a simple miss tell and I'm ban on the spot. I've sent miss tells before and it was really embarrassing what was seen and I'll never forget it but that doesn't mean it will never happen again. What if something meant for someone close to me is MT and someone takes it out of context and reports me? I'm finished.

Sorry but this is an over exaggeration of the risk of mistells. You would have to be saying some very vulgar things for a random person to be able to take it out of context and get you in trouble over it. And you would have to be constantly doing it to be at great risk of an ill-fated mistell. This is not how normal conversation works.

Ah, then I guess I'm just doomed. I'll just give up on everything then. Thank you all for giving me the eyes to see that not a single person cares. Have a wonderful life. Lesson learn for me. Never bother to try and speak out. Always be pushed down and stepped on and laughed at. Got it.

You messed up multiple times and got multiple warnings, you didn't take them seriously and now you're regretting it. But instead of changing your behaviour you want SE to make the rules more lax to allow you to maintain it. It's pretty hard to pity someone who is a repeat offender and refuses to do anything but play the victim card.

"Never to try and speak out"? As far as this game is concerned you are not an oppressed individual. You're on the verge of losing your account due to your own poor behaviour. You're not a victim of prejudice or classism. You're a victim of your own actions. People would be far more compassionate if you showed a true inclination to want to improve your standing with the game. But you don't want to do that. You want the game to improve its standing with you. Sorry but this behaviour is entitled. This is why you're not getting the pity you seek.

[Aramina]

If you break the rules, you have to accept the punishment. Having poor impulse control is not an excuse any more than an addict getting pulled over for a DUI saying "but I am an addict, it's not my fault!" is.

[Gurney]

If there is a admin seeing this please lock the thread it is going nowhere fast. This is starting to remind me of something that was going on the BG forums back when I played 11. Player was playing the victim card, and things that had happened to them is why they acted the way they did. It caused a lot of drama between players from several linkshells and servers. In the end it blew up in the person face.

[TarynH]

What? I've never said that. They're only breaking it when they begin to talk badly to the others or myself in the party for not doing the fight perfect like they expect it to be done. For example If you're not perfectly on a way marker or perfectly beside someone they flip their lid on someone and begin going off on them, telling them how bad at the game they are..ect. Love how you twist my words and spin it in what ever direction fits YOUR narrative.

Okay, I have an idea that might help you. (Since you say you can't help but respond.) Next time someone acts toxic, roleplay as someone that asks them NICELY to please stop. Do not swear at them, or insult their mother. Tell them that they are ruining your enjoyment of the game. And if they don't stop, LEAVE. This is considered a social norm. This is how normal adults handle situations. They don't mouth off like a middle school child trying to win a bus fight. They don't bottle their rage and release it like the Hulk in public.

Someone else being toxic does not give you an excuse to in-turn be toxic. No matter what you want to label yourself as, you will always be seen as toxic when doing this. Also, stop white knighting for others. If the so-called "victim" in your scenario doesn't say anything about it, it usually means they're beyond caring about what the person is saying. They possibly care even less about what you might say to that abusive player in response. In fact, if anyone did this for me, I'd want them both to be quiet; and would most likely leave myself.

As for your plight: Stop breaking the rules. You got plenty of warnings to stop. So just stop. No excuses. You either want to keep your account, or you don't. What's it worth to you? People have given you good advice on this thread. Instead of jumping to respond with your victim card in hand, try reading a few posts. There is some empathy if you really look. But people are also trying to convey to you that changing the rules will not matter, if you first don't change yourself. You have to want that. They probably already read your suggestion. Maybe they'll change the rule. Maybe they won't. So leave it at that. Now get to work on changing yourself so you don't screw it up the next time.

[Transient_Shadow]

OP this sounds like an anger management issue. I struggle with the same thing all be it not to the severity that you do. In the past I was an incredibly salty jerk. I would whine and complain about the smallest thing and I was easily provoked. But one day in overwatch I made a cutesy mercy persona ironically. The double irony is that this persona made me realize I wasn't happy being a salty jerk.

After that day I've tried little by little to become a better person and control my anger. I sometimes relapse but I've been getting better at catching myself. I wish you the best in finding the help you need. As others have posted before its easy to follow the rules. I agree that good behavior should help clean up a persons record but I don't make the rules.

[Jojoya]

Not everyone is as quick as you are. But yes, punish the slower and the less intelligent. Kick us when we're done and looking for salvation.

You're not looking for salvation. Salvation comes from getting help from someone who can teach you to control your impulses. It doesn't come from making excuses for your behavior and asking to avoid the consequences for that behavior.

If they make their penalty system more lenient for your sake, it opens the door for abuse by others. It's not something that benefits the game.

If you have that much of a problem with how you react to others, there's really a simple solution. Disable chat when you're around strangers that you feel might say something that will provoke you.

[Akonyl]

I'd just like to point out OP, that I don't think I've actually seen you tell someone to F off or SMD yet in this thread despite almost everyone disagreeing with you pretty harshly (only actually saying them in references to your in-game behavior). It's obviously easier to police your language on a forum than a game chat where conversation happens quickly, but the fact that you're doing it means that you definitely can control yourself with some effort. Just try harder in-game to practice the restraint you've shown in this thread.

[Lunalepsy]

*hugs* I think you need one. @.@

[Paladinleeds]

Look for professional support in order to deal with the issues that you are facing. There is support available. For example I have autism, and some pretty bad social skills. I am currently getting support from an organisation that specialises in helping people with autism. You remind me of a very toxic friend I used to have. She would be nasty and stuff. When she was called out, she blamed BPD for being toxic, and that it was just "who she is", rather than accepting that she needs to work on herself.

Sorry to say, but change comes from within. If you're willing to change yourself and improve, then we're more likely to be sympathetic. But it sounds like you want SE to burden all the responsibility, which even in legal terms would not be considered fair as it would not be a "Reasonable adjustment". So sorry, but as someone who has similar issues of communication problems, I cannot approve of this idea.

[KageTokage]

I'm going to be totally honest in saying that the way ToS is enforced does need some work.

The permanent strike system can be both overly punishing to minor offenders (Particularly because of how inconsistent the GMs can be with passing judgment, with a petty offense like standing on someone's lawn being considered actionable and stalking being ignored as some examples) and too lenient for long-time offenders who only get caught after years of misbehavior.

Not saying the TC wasn't at fault or anything, though.