How to give advice

[JohnSeal]

^ Like Jijifli said earlier, this is technically criticism, (and not constructive criticism). If going by your own advice, you shouldn\\'t have said this. So you in your own words were just "impolite,rude,unsettling and not appreciate".

By your earlier comments, I think you are getting criticism mixed up with Destructive Criticism, and example of destructive criticism is "Your dps is bad, you should uninstall the game." This is criticism that does not help the person it was given to in any way, shape or form.

Also, your comment sounded really patronizing, I don\\'t know if you know it, but I\\'ll assume that you didn\\'t mean it to be. For example, that "Lol" and dismissing what I said as fiction, could give the impression that you could be laughing at me/my comment. And assuming I only use it criticize others and I can\\'t take criticism /don\\'t criticize myself?
That kind of tone is really going to rub people the wrong way, and in the long run could be damaging to your discussion. People are not going to convert to your way of thinking if they think they are being insulted.


They also discussed in the paper how important neutral tones were in discussions, because accidentally offending someone is not the way you change their minds about something. Neutral tones can help prevent this. Neutral tones also tend to make it easier for people to read and understand a point. So I again, am going to offer my friendly advice to maybe have your tone more neutral, as I think it might help you in the long run. You are welcome to take the advice, or leave it.

Yes I was laughing at what you say.
Constructive criticism are not real, when people criticise others then justified themselves by saying: Oh no, mine was a CONSTRUCTIVE criticism!

I personally think criticise others is just wrong, not welcome and uncalled for!
Advices may be ok,but friendly and written in a nice way. For me this two words are the opposite things!

Anyway I personally try to improve myself in life and in game every day, auto-critic come from recognising our own mistakes. If in a content I made mistakes I recognised and try not to make it again.

Btw I try to express myself clearly and to make who I am talking too what I think and feel. Sometimes I get misunderstood, like earlier I was trying to give a healthy advice to the guy but he didn’t get it.
Sometimes I criticise and something I like to advice. I can be much more sarcastic but so avoid to. I am human not a saint but still I never criticise players in game becuse their level or perform doesn’t matter to me

[Jijifli]

Yes I was laughing at what you say.
Constructive criticism are not real, when people criticise others then justified themselves by saying: Oh no, mine was a CONSTRUCTIVE criticism!

I personally think criticise others is just wrong, not welcome and uncalled for!

But that's literally what you're doing.

And this is actually using "literally" correctly. The blue moon has risen.

[NessaWyvern]

Yes I was laughing at what you say.

Well, that's a bit rude and uncalled for in my opinion, when I was just trying to be serious and helpful.¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Sometimes I get misunderstood, like earlier I was trying to give a healthy advice to the guy but he didn’t get it.

I know this exact feeling all too well, as it has just happened to me very recently.

[Rymm]

Constructive criticism are not real, when people criticise others then justified themselves by saying: Oh no, mine was a CONSTRUCTIVE criticism!

Debating the merits of criticism (or lack thereof) with you is pointless if you refuse to acknowledge that not only are you using the wrong definition of the word, but you are the only person in the conversation using that particular definition. In doing so, you are willfully misunderstanding everyone who is trying to converse with you. Like I said previously, this kind of behavior makes it impossible communicate in any meaningful way.

[JohnSeal]

But that's literally what you're doing.

And this is actually using "literally" correctly. The blue moon has risen.

Hey I am human, not perfect and sometimes I criticise! I admit it, not lying, sometimes I give advices and others I criticise when I read something I feel like totally unrealistic.
Sometimes I give just a plain opinion.
Still I would never criticise someone for playing poorly.

Btw we should let this thread die lol

[JohnSeal]

Well, that's a bit rude and uncalled for in my opinion, when I was just trying to be serious and helpful.¯\_(ツ)_/¯




I know this exact feeling all too well, as it has just happened to me very recently.

Apologies if you felt offended!

Not condescending or being sarcastic I mean it.

[NessaWyvern]

Apologies if you felt offended!

Not condescending or being sarcastic I mean it.

"Apologies if you felt offended" means little, it's not a true apology. The correct apology someone could make would be "Sorry I offended you" as those kinds of apologies actually accepts the blame to a mistake that someone could be sorry for. The one you made puts the blame on the one you are supposed to be apologizing to.

My husband's first language isn't English either, and he has stated many times that English has certain intricacies that other languages don't have. I have tried to explain some of these, like the one above, and about the different forms of criticism.

[Nixxe]

Arguing semantics with someone who isn't a native speaker and clearly has only a rudimentary understanding of the language, yet feels confident enough to act as though they're an expert, is a truly pointless endeavor. Sometimes it's best to just wash your hands of it and walk away.

[NessaWyvern]

Arguing semantics with someone who isn't a native speaker and clearly has only a rudimentary understanding of the language, yet feels confident enough to act as though they're an expert, is a truly pointless endeavor. Sometimes it's best to just wash your hands of it and walk away.

Aye, this is good advice, and a conclusion I had also came to. I will take your advice (Sorry if this sounds a bit cheesy just going with the theme of advice :P)

You can only give advice, you can never make someone take it, no matter how much you try to explain to them as to why it is good advice.
A reoccurring theme in this thread.

[JohnSeal]

Debating the merits of criticism (or lack thereof) with you is pointless if you refuse to acknowledge that not only are you using the wrong definition of the word, but you are the only person in the conversation using that particular definition. In doing so, you are willfully misunderstanding everyone who is trying to converse with you. Like I said previously, this kind of behavior makes it impossible communicate in any meaningful way.

Omg it’s not only me!! I just take things to personal and I don’t let things go.... Many people agree that criticise and advice are different things! The thread was “How to advice “ and not became a big deal.
That’s my point and won’t change, I don’t want criticism of any kind, I try to defend the minority of players that feel disrespected by others and try to explain how the two things are different. If someone doesn’t agree that’s fine no hard feelings.
Please let’s try not to misunderstand other than my words my intention too.

I don’t want to debate I want to sensible the community, I want less sad or upset players, less reports and a more friendly community that’s all!
If some at least understood how to talk to others in a better and constructive way I probably got a result