How to give advice

[Melichoir]

Can't sympathize. I don't understand the people with your mindset who think they are above criticism and that people need to sugarcoat every little word they say. You already admit you should work on that, so instead of getting upset take the good points and learn from the situation.

You dont pay my sub!!!

Joke aside though, you shouldnt go up to a person and be like "You suck, let me tell you how to not suck. Be grateful". I mention this for a few reasons:

1) If youre a stranger to them, who the heck are you to them? Sorry, but they dont know you. They dont know how much an expert you are, or anything. So any advice you want to give them can and usually does get lost on deaf ears because they dont know you. IF ANYTHING, you should be redirecting them to community sources that are widely agreed upon, like the discord server for all this stuff.

2) You dont have to be an jerk hole about things either. Ask them, and be polite about it. Its really surprising how many people do not get this: A little common courtesy goes a loooooong way. You think theyre doing it wrong, be like "Hey, Im a 'x' main and pretty good. I think you might be doing your rotation wrong. Ive some pointers if youd like." Or something like that. Going up to them and being like "You suck you scrub. Do this and this and maybe youll be able to git gud. Dur hur, be grateful cause Im sharing my expertise with you." isnt productive. IMAGINE, for a second, if you were doing something and you thought you were doing ok, and some random stranger walked up to you and was like "Hey, you suck. Let me show you how its done. You should be grateful Im taking time to show you how to not suck." Its off putting and comes off as offensive.

3) People learn at their own pace. Assuming theyre not trying to get better, and patronizing them by showing them how its 'done' is freaking annoying. You DONT know anything about that player unless youve been playing with them consistently. They may be trying to learn something. Again, being a jerk to them assuming they suck and youre super good isnt productive.

And to address the point you make about people hwo are above criticism: My experience is that those people are Few and Far between. They exist, but most people will be willing to give you an ear if you are pretty chill with them. But hey, that requires a touch of effort.

[alimdia]

I do agree that advice should be given respectfully, the sugarcoating part of my post referred more to asking before giving a tip, which IMO should not be necessary.

[ko_]

I do agree that advice should be given respectfully, the sugarcoating part of my post referred more to asking before giving a tip, which IMO should not be necessary.

Context is key tho. I know for a fact you wouldn't be too keen on some random coming to you in real life and flat out saying you are living your life wrong. I'm not saying advice giving is wrong but you cant come incorrect and expect them to correct themselves. Cause you're nothing but a stranger to them.

[alimdia]

Context is key tho. I know for a fact you wouldn't be too keen on some random coming to you in real life and flat out saying you are living your life wrong. I'm not saying advice giving is wrong but you cant come incorrect and expect them to correct themselves. Cause you're nothing but a stranger to them.

The context in this case is a team based MMO and doing group content, I'd say that warrants overriding asking for permission before giving tips.

[Melichoir]

If its savage, EX, ultimate or other content where a player can mess up real hard for everyone involved (causing wipes due to things like DPS checks, or failing mechanics, etc). Yeah, maknig a call out then mid fight isnt inherently unwarranted.

But if were talking about Dungeons, 24 mans on farm, basic and hard modes, etc. Things where a person could quite literally spam one DPS skill and probably still make the dps check, yeah, there is no reason why you shouldnt ask. Cause the general truth is simple: If youre doing Savage/EX/etc, thats high end content (more or less. People can debate that), and those involved should be aware of not only how to play their class but also fight mechanics. If they choose not to learn their class, thats on them. It matters then.

But in lower level stuff, no, being rude and shoving 'tips' into peoples face isnt warranted. It doesnt take you much effort to be like "Hey, would like some tips on how to play 'x'. I main that" or something. They can say no, and it sucks for you, cause MAYBE the run will go a touch slower, but its not hte end of hte world. Its a bit of push and pull. Standard content everyone goes through, youre going to have to put up with lower skilled people who may not want to get better. Save your advise for people who want it, or for content where it matters.

[alimdia]

If its savage, EX, ultimate or other content where a player can mess up real hard for everyone involved (causing wipes due to things like DPS checks, or failing mechanics, etc). Yeah, maknig a call out then mid fight isnt inherently unwarranted.

But if were talking about Dungeons, 24 mans on farm, basic and hard modes, etc. Things where a person could quite literally spam one DPS skill and probably still make the dps check, yeah, there is no reason why you shouldnt ask. Cause the general truth is simple: If youre doing Savage/EX/etc, thats high end content (more or less. People can debate that), and those involved should be aware of not only how to play their class but also fight mechanics. If they choose not to learn their class, thats on them. It matters then.

But in lower level stuff, no, being rude and shoving 'tips' into peoples face isnt warranted. It doesnt take you much effort to be like "Hey, would like some tips on how to play 'x'. I main that" or something. They can say no, and it sucks for you, cause MAYBE the run will go a touch slower, but its not hte end of hte world. Its a bit of push and pull. Standard content everyone goes through, youre going to have to put up with lower skilled people who may not want to get better. Save your advise for people who want it, or for content where it matters.

Giving tips isn't rude, and easy content is the most appropriate scenario for tips because that's where you practice and learn for the harder stuff, by the time you reach savage you're already supposed to know not to use an aoe rotation for single target.

Be more positive, if you're taking the goodwill of other people as a personal attack then the problem isn't them.